Keeping it Real with Zulma The Swearing Therapist Podcast

Let’s get honest: are you actually happy , or are you just really, really comfortable? Because those two things are not the same, even though we love to pretend they are. Comfort is familiar, predictable, and cozy. Growth? Growth is awkward, unsettling, and makes you question your life choices at 2 a.m. In this episode, I talk about why the moments that stretch us the most are usually the ones tha...

I saw a reel on Instagram that stopped me in my tracks. It said that new beginnings are not just exciting, they also come with grief for what we are leaving behind. And wow… that hit me like a ton of bricks. Because while I am out here living on the beach, I found myself wondering why I was not farting rainbows and throwing confetti every five minutes. This episode is about that uncomfortable, hon...

New Year’s resolutions? Please. We both know half of them die faster than leftover champagne bubbles. And then there’s Quitters Day , that tragic second Friday in January when everyone quietly gives up and pretends they never promised a fucking thing. This year, I am not playing that game. Instead of setting myself up for failure with resolutions that feel like punishment, I am choosing intentions...

My adventures in Panama reminded me that growth does not happen in calm, curated moments, it happens in real life. I lost my phone in the middle of a Christmas parade with thousands of people. Total chaos. And then… I found it. A blessing, a miracle, and a reminder that not everything spirals just because it could . Next came the move to the beach. It’s beautiful: right on the ocean, with waves I...

Welcome to Panama… where the airline decided to ship one out of the five suitcases I paid for and confidently said, “Good luck.” At another point in my life, this would have felt like the end of the fucking world. This time? I shrugged, laughed, and called it part of the adventure. Growth, baby. What looked like chaos turned out to be a blessing in disguise. The airline delivered the other four su...

The magic of Christmas… might not be all that magical. At least not for me. I have never been a fan of the holiday hypocrisy: the forced cheer, the performative “joy,” and the obsession with buying mountains of gifts while completely skipping over the actual point of the holiday: Christ. Somewhere along the way, the season got louder, flashier, and more chaotic… and people forgot to slow the fuck...

Age is nothing but a fucking number, one we give way too much power to. After I told a client I am moving to Panama at 60 and watched her jaw hit the floor, I started thinking about my dad. This man got married the second time at 73. Seventy-three! My siblings panicked, disagreed, rolled their eyes... meanwhile I was over here like, “Go for it, Dad… how much longer can you possibly live?” Well, jo...

Let’s get one thing straight: you do not make mistakes, mistakes make you. Every spectacular fuck-up, questionable decision, ignored red flag, and “well… that escalated quickly” moment has been molding you into the badass sitting here today. Mistakes are not proof you are broken, they are proof you are learning, evolving, and refusing to stay stuck. When you know better, you do better… and until t...

This week, I’m sharing something deeply personal: my goodbye party, which I themed as a “funeral.” Not for shock value, not for drama, but because I wanted to be present at my own celebration. I wanted to hear the words, the stories, and the impact I have had on the people I love… while I am still alive to receive them. The truth is, funerals are for the living. When I am gone, I will not hear the...

This week, we are diving into one of the biggest relationship headaches ever: the way men and women’s brains are wired completely differently. Women want to vent, men want to fix... and boom, instant chaos. She is pissed he is not listening, he is confused why she is still mad when he just offered ten solutions. Sound familiar? Here is the deal: neither one is wrong, we are just built different. W...

I’m thrilled to finally get my hour back! The one that daylight savings stole from me back in March. But beyond that little victory, this week reminded me of something bigger: sometimes, you don’t have to do a damn thing. I had a situation that had me all fired up, ready to jump in and fix it, control it, manage it. But I didn’t. I stepped back. I let it breathe. And guess what? It took care of it...

I finally did it. That last fucking box? Unpacked. The one that sat there silently mocking me since I moved. What felt impossible when I first got here is now DONE! That little win reminded me of a big truth: when shit feels overwhelming, slow the hell down and take it one step at a time. In this episode, I talk about grounding, staying present, and why trying to tackle everything at once will onl...

Here’s the truth: the world doesn’t need another copy-paste version of someone else. It needs you . Your voice, your perspective, your messy brilliance inthe way only you can deliver it. Recently, a few of my clients told me my story inspired them to finally do their thing, and holy shit, that hit me right in the heart. It reminded me that showing up authentically (flaws, F-bombs, and all) actuall...

Let’s get one thing straight: I had cancer, cancer didn’t have me . It didn’t define me, control me, or get the last damn word. If anything, that diagnosis lit a fire under my ass and made me realize not only how badly I wanted to be a therapist, but also how much fight I had left in me. In Part 2 , I get real about what it means to take your power back when life tries to knock you down. Cancer ca...

In this episode, I share with you one of the hardest, most surreal moments of my life: the day I was told I had breast cancer. The surgeon who dropped the bomb had the empathy of a rock and the ego of a god. No compassion, no warmth... just cold, clinical words that shattered my world in seconds. Today in Part 1, I lay it all out: the shock, the disbelief, the anger, and the “what the actual fuck”...

Lately, my life has been one big project—moving parts everywhere, big transitions coming, and a to-do list that looks like a CVS receipt. Between preparing to take my practice fully virtual and planning the next chapter of my life, there have been plenty of moments where I’ve thought, “holy shit, this is too much.” So in this episode, I’m keeping it brutally real about how I deal when everything s...

A friend asked me what I’ll miss the most, and that question hit different. My first instinct? Not the house. Not the car. Not the shiny crap you can buy, sell, or shove in a moving truck. That stuff doesn’t matter. The real answer? Time. Time with my friends. Time laughing until our stomachs hurt. Time sitting around a table, talking about everything and nothing. Time just being seen and loved fo...

One year ago, I hit “post” on my very first video as The Swearing Therapist —and I was scared out of my damn mind. But I did it anyway. Shoutout to my therapist for telling me to quit overthinking, take my own advice, and just fucking do it. What started as one shaky, terrifying little video turned into a full-on expansion of who I am. Videos, this podcast, and a whole lot of growth I didn’t even...

I finally cracked open boxes I hadn’t touched in two decades—and damn, what a trip. I found newspapers and magazines from 9/11/01 (tried donating them to the library, and even they didn’t know what the hell to do with them). Buried in the pile were letters and cards from my parents, siblings, nieces, nephews, other family members, friends, and coworkers. And then came the surprise gem: a letter fr...

This isn’t just another episode. This is THE announcement—the kind that shakes the ground under your feet and changes everything moving forward. Personally. Professionally. Life as I know it. And the timing couldn’t be more fitting: this is Solo Episode 29 , which is the day I was born! Talk about alignment. In this episode, I’m pulling back the curtain on a decision that’s equal parts bold and el...

Sometimes life drops you smack in the middle of a situation you didn’t plan for—and suddenly, you’ve got a choice. Do you freeze, or do you step in? Recently, I found myself at the right place at the right time, and I ended up diffusing a situation before it could blow up. And you know what? It felt damn good. Not because I’m a superhero, but because I trusted my gut, stayed grounded, and showed u...

Part of the big reveal: my practice is going fully virtual this December. Hell yes. But here’s the kicker—I’ve been setting up all the new electronic crap (forms, platforms, systems) and instead of patting myself on the back for learning something brand new, I was roasting myself like a mean-ass drill sergeant. And then it hit me: I’d never talk to a client the way I was talking to myself. So why...

Change is a pain in the ass—and it’s also the only thing you can bank on. In this episode, I get brutally honest about two flavors of chaos: the kind you choose and the kind that steamrolls you. When you initiate change , you’re steering the bus—still scary, but you’ve got agency, intention, and a say in the speed. I’ll cover micro-moves that build momentum, how to keep your nervous system from fr...

Alright, dream chasers—this one’s for you. In this episode, we’re tearing down the myth that you need a PhD in Life Planning before you can start. Fueled by a fresh dive into Paulo Coelho’s The Alchemist , I’m here to tell you that your “calling” isn’t waiting for you at the end of a perfect, sparkling roadmap. Get ready to: Stop pussyfooting around your dreams—perfection is a shit sandwich, so ta...

Let’s get real: you don’t need to have it all figured out before you make a life-changing decision. Sometimes you leap—and the universe scrambles to catch up. In this episode, I talk about some major personal and professional changes coming in 2026 (yes, the kind that shake your whole damn foundation), and how clarity comes after the decision, not before it. I also spill the tea on a recent experi...