Jake Yapp presents: Not Today, Thank You

All of that. Plus everyone's exceedingly funny ideas for Harry and Meghan's show pitches to Netflix. Well done, all. See you tomorrow! Oh, and would you mind pressing that 'Subscribe' button, there? Just... Up a... Bit... Somewhere there. Anyway x Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A look ahead to this week's Davos summit, plus the beginnings of Johnsonian politics, and the real Project Fear, and who's really projecting it. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello from Somewhere In Wales. It has been quite a mission, getting this to you. Find out more in the podcast. PLUS: Monty Don Gets It On, and your chance to have your very own mouthful of Snoop Dogg... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

...which is a dressed-up way of telling you I had to whisper the whole thing from a very quiet AirBnB. But there's a lot of fun in here - Usher on Loose Women, Arnie having a marriage breakup, and dumbed-down Mastermind... I will be LOUDER TOMORROW x Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sorry it's late - I was a bit poorly* last night. Anyway, here it is! *splatty Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Morning! Featuring a royal conference call, global debt, Priti Patel's hot take on the racist press and how it relates to Lulu, and some #AltLoveHearts Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Yes, Love Island returns, and what's wrong with that, eh. Also: Royals News, the Festival of Brexit, and Jeff BOZOS MORE LIKE I ALWAYS SAY ok thanks. Plus: what you're drinking right now. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As the fallout continues over #Megxit, a roundup of the rabid pundits reacting to the news. Plus YOUR suggestions for who should serve as a government advisor. Have a good weekend! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle are off. Also, we have some Corrections, Clarifications and Omissions, and some frankly scandalous anonymous emails about How To Win Competitions... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Morning! Or afternoon or whatever. It all kicked off about Jaffa Cakes. Not the most pressing issue, but we also covered Brexit talks. But it was mainly Jaffa Cakes. I'll try to move on for tomorrow. But I'll fail. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which Emily Thornberry gives elocution lessons to Rebecca Long-Bailey, Radio 3 dumbs down, and we have some fun adverts from The Sun and Burger King and things and such ok fine this podcast is really late sorry I shall get on with uploading it now ok bye Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Happy New Year! It's great to be back MATE I TELL YOU WHAT THE BBC BIAS IT'S A JOKE MATE I WOULDN'T EVEN GO ON QUESTION TIME IF YOU OFFERED ME A MILLION QUID etc. Also: Trump on Iran, the Golden Globes, rail fare price hikes, and highly unbiased GEREMY WINE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Not-quite-the-concluding part of the Nick Knowles saga. I'll try to get the last bit done at SOME POINT over the weekend. Although somebody's chucked a big musical finish in there. HEROIC WORK. The normal podcast returns Monday 6th Jan! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Who has been behind the nefarious doings? All is about to be revealed, like a Changing Rooms Home Makeovers... 3-2-1... Open your eyes! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

**Special Guest Star: Paul Coia** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

More unexpurgated and spurious filth Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A mystery chopper, with a new man behind it. Continuing our crowd-written Nick Knowles fanfic... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It continues! Thanks to heroic efforts by the crowd-writing team, Nick Knowles' steamy, and edge-of-the-seat exploits are extended far beyond an appropriate length. Tuck in! There'll be more tomorrow. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The thrilling climax to our Nick Knowles erotica. Or IS IT? I literally don't know. I'll have to check the Google Doc later on, and see if anyone's written any more... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

More of our crowd-written adult novel concerning the fictionalised life and times of Nick Knowles. Today: Nick enlists the help of two hirsute motorcyclists... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The continuing, crowd-written adventures of TV's Nick Knowles. Today: Knowles finds himself bound to a trellis in Charlie Dimmock's basement... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Being a continuation of the seminal Nick Knowles adult fiction written entirely by listeners to this podcast. Merry Christmas! More tomorrow... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

After a perhaps long-overdue reappraisal of the original, I humbly offer a new interpretation of Fairytale of New York for the Modern Age. Also - Amol Rajan interviewed Ian Hislop last night - we have an exclusive clip. And more of the seminal erotic novel about Nick Knowles. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Featuring the ultimate one-size-fits all distillation of every Christmas into two-and-a-half minutes, a quick tour around the ITV Hub, and the thrilling premiere of Fifty Trades of Grey, the crowd-written erotic novel about Nick Knowles. If YOU would like to write a bit of it, then feel free to make your contribution. Here's the link to the google doc: https://tinyurl.com/yxxao63a Hosted on Acast....

Reviews of Cats - The Movie, Secret Lemonade Licking, and the beginning of what I hope will become a perpetual strand: Nick Knowles Fan Fiction. Have a lovely weekend! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.