Jake Yapp presents: Not Today, Thank You

Sometimes a seeming disaster gives rise to something magical. Michael Rosen and I went to Salford to record Friday's Christmas edition of The Verb on BBC Radio 3. And on the way back, a fallen tree caused our train to stop, go to reduced power, and finally, to plunge us all into darkness. As we waited for around an hour and a half for another train to come, Michael Rosen charmed and cheered the 'Q...

In which I have a look at A Berry Royal Christmas, an offering from the BBC with a Christmassy blend of alcoholism, human despair and cake. Plus - I am off to Salford today, so have a jazzy musical take on BBC Breakfast... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which Gregg Wallace takes us inside the magical factory where dreams are made reality - TELEVISION - the Marvel of the Modern Age, allowing us to point at things and go 'wow!' Also, news that the alcohol in mince pies can put you over the limit, and all the foods YOU have been hoarding. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As the Labour Party tries to rebuild itself, Boris has to face the reality of how to Got Brexit Did. Plus, Sports Personality of the Year, and the return of a much-missed old friend. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The results of the General Election are in. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jake Yapp brings you a preview of tonight's election coverage, Amol Rajan explores the mysterious world of Facebook advertising, and we have some stupendous election audio from David Van Day. It's truly breathtaking. GOOD LUCK, EVERYONE. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which we draw back the velvet curtain and are briefly allowed a privileged glimpse into the world of PR, we hear an exclusive song from Billy Bragg, and Postman Pat gets a hell of a going over. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

After Boris Johnson attempts to trouser a journalist's mobile phone during an interview, I have some advice: Think BBC. Also: Elton John's Million Pound Piano, and Andrew Lloyd-Webber's Eurovision Entry. Plus your coach stories and confessions. Follow me on @nottodaypod on the Twitter. Morning! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

John McDonnell was on the Today programme this morning, discussing policylols with A Actual Billionaire. I applied my usual in-depth analysis to that. Incidentally, all the figures in the sketches are accurate, as far as I could research. Just saying. Plus we have some Andrew Marr fun. Plus Your Confessions, which are marvellous. If you have any more, or any fun stories about coach trips, email no...

Andrew Neil challenged Boris Johnson to come and debate him on TV last night - we have some exclusive audio. Also the politician-interview tango, a second Xmas Pressie Roundup - the #BOGBANTZ continue, I'm afraid - and Geremy Wine trawls for calls... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Morning! Today we have an exclusive extract from Richard Dawkins new webinar series, 'Phallusies', a brief snatch of Jo Swinson, and your suggestions for which Christmas song to ban. If you'd like to get in touch, it's nottodaypod on twitter, or email nottoday at swanburst dot com. Thanks! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Radio 1 In Two Minutes, the absolute worst tat, I mean, most EXCELLENT Christmas Presents of the year, Modern Mr Men, and more horrific stories about defective Kates Bush. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Trump is at a NATO ceremony in Watford today, and Johnson is hoping he'll keep his mouth SHUT. We have an exclusive extract from Will Self's new Radio 4 Series 'Will Self Walks a Mile', and more of your mundane dreams, defective Kate Bushes, and unheeded warnings. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Andrew Marr interviews Boris Johnson, Nick Robinson And Garry Withersport behinds the scenes in the Today studio, and your stories about lousy bargains in #YoureTheExpert. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A senior edition of Top Gear for you, following on from Jeremy Clarkson blaming Greta Thunberg for killing the car show. Plus listener's stories about nearly exploding with irony, and a musical extravaganza from musical sensation The Lightfooters. Bon weekend! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Morning! Being a fun medley of Fraser Nelson's historically-important account of life in London in the Dark Ages (2019), and THAT John Lewis Christmas advert. We have a new email address - today we're asking: what's the last time you almost exploded with irony? Email Not Today at Swanburst dot com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today: A profile of your next Prime Minister, Jo Swinson, a review of last night's BBC3 on BBC1 offering: Plastic Surgery Undressed, and a hat tip to our hero of the last 24 hours, Green MEP Molly Scott-Cato... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Yes, we get all fun 'n' jazzy 'n' highly inappropriate with the most controversial film of the year, in order to try to bring the film's important message to the Frozen 2 audience. Plus we visit a parallel universe. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Morning! In which we find out Where Jacob Rees-Mogg Is, and a fabulous treat for your gran this Christmas - it can only be Xander... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ok so yesterday went absolutely bonkerlols and I am typing this well into my eighteenth hour of working, so I'll keep it brief. But I was joined by the wonderful Natt Tapley, we have a song about the G20, and the absolutely most hilarious #YoureTheExpert ever. Well done, everyone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I had no idea the American robin's latin name was Turdus Migratorius. Anyway. Priti Patel is our tweet, sorry, twit of the day. Also: Impeachment news, and assorted mucking about. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The leaders' debate last night - what do Actual People think? Plus Nigel Farage's Grandstand, and Geremy Wine with the coolest phone-in on the radio. I'll get more sleep tonight, I promise. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Looking ahead to tonight's leaders' debate on ITV, and sadly reflecting on the end of KPMG's partnership with Pitch@Palace. Maybe Andrew should set up Pitch@Putt@Palace. Or maybe getting up at 5.45 is really starting to kick in. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Good MORNING! And welcome to episode one of Not Today, Thank You. Today, Jake Yapp looks at the fallout from Prince Andrew's fabulous Newsnight interview, and we have some Top Media Insight from Amol. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We launch properly on November 18th at 8am... Make sure you subscribe, so you don't miss out when you forget all about this because PEOPLE'S MENTAL LOADS THESE DAYS ARE RIDICULOUS. You work too hard. Maybe book a spa day or something. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.