J & J People Are The Worst

Accountability! It's becoming a foreign concept these days. That heifer Alex from Netflix's "Maid", has NO idea what that word means. This asshole could have changed her whole life, with one trojan! Fuck all that though, let's pass the buck at every available opportunity. All I can do at this point, is sit back and watch the mayhem. I'm trying to warn as many as I can, but even if you lead a horse...

Speed comedy challenge: Write a funny description before you start turtling, because you've had to go to the bathroom for 30 minutes, but you couldn't stop watching "Maid" on Netflix to see just how creatively they would be able to absolve a single mom from all of her bad life decisions. And, GO! So, this week we discuss bullying. Fat bitches that work in the front offices of schools, kids that co...

There are some sick bastards in this world. We know, because we've seen the tape! You may think we're messed up because of the things we talk about, bless your heart. Trust me, if you've never seen cartel videos, on the job accident videos, or crazy random ass murder videos, go ahead and skip it. You don't want that on your hard drive, because government watchlists and whatnot. You also don't want...

This week, we discuss a high-profile Olympic sprinter that missed her relationship window, and a Moroccan soccer star that dodged an expensive bullet thanks to his loving Mom. Tupac didn't sing "Dear Mama" for nothing! Let's talk about expectations for a second. Like our good friend LoLo, I'm sure we all hold ourselves in high esteem. I believe everybody should believe that they themselves are a 1...

A-S-S-H-O-L-E. That's how you spell Moon. There are lots of assholes in this world, and this week we get to cast our unique judgment on a handful of them. There will be thrills, chills, and general cunty behavior. If you ever question whether or not you're being an asshole in a certain situation, go ahead and give this a try next time. Head to the restroom, stand in front of the mirror, turn aroun...

This week, we start off with analysis of Rose's fuck-ery on the Titanic. Then, Piggy demands her weekly allotted attention during recording{Per her contract). Next, we have a little Below Deck drama, involving firing a total twat of a First Chief Stew, and a crazy jealous plastic hoe. Which in turn, leads to a "fuck around and find out" rant that was wonderfully navigated by Jenn. Lastly, a recap...

Men are creatures of habit and can easily find contentment. I have found that this fact can drive women absolutely crazy. The idea that men can be so happy with such simple things, along with the fact that it's almost an impossible concept for the female mind to grasp, can incite both confusion and rage for ladies. I've been criticized by at least 2 exes for ordering the exact same meals while din...

We all tease, with our wicked ways. Women tease in a much more brutal fashion. Sometimes knowingly, and sometimes they're oblivious to their tempting ways. Whatever the case may be, don't feel too bad about it. Just remember this shit ladies! Every man will chase that cookie. The only men that really deserve it are the ones that continue to put in the work, even after it's clear they won't be reac...

You see, if I got one of my wishes everybody would see the world like Shallow Hal, and none of this would be a problem. But NO! Everybody wants a fucking "hottie", or "baddie", Do you really deserve one though? Guys that shoot above their level, usually get brought back down to Earth fairly quickly. Hell, guys that shoot AT their level usually catch the wrath of a bitter heifer that can't wait to...

I'm on a boat motherfucker, take a look at me. Straight floatin' on a boat, on the deep blue sea. Busting five knots, wind whipping out my coat. You can't stop me motherfucker, 'cause I'm on a boat. Do you remember that song? Are you old like me? Autotune hit the mainstream, and blew eveybody's fucking minds. Talent was no longer a prerequisite for singing. Looking at you, every semi-cute girl but...

Happy Saint Patrick's Day! If you're a proud hoe, just make sure you drink enough to make this episode fade into the ether like a bad dream. I'm sure you'll find my guidelines completely ridiculous, which is kind of the point. I mean, it WOULD work. But, how many high body count ladies would really put in that kind of effort, when they could just continue to ride the cock carousel, and lie to them...

So young, so naive, and full of hope. The memories of my youth fade like dreams from a shallow sleep, as I awake to a fresh nightmare each day. There are two pieces of advice that have been bestowed upon me from every elder that I've ever been around for extended periods of time, during a tete-a-tete. Number one, "Don't ever get married.". Check, and check. Number two, "Never grow old.". A little...

I don't know why old people can't just be old? You're fucking old. BE OLD! I'm well on my way, and I know there's no going back. These old heifers seem to have lost their minds though. Once you hit those fifties, it's time to hang up the high heels and night club dresses, put on a frilly apron, and go bake some goddamn cookies. Don't be out there with a frozen botox face looking constantly surpris...

Have you ever looked at a car on the road that is just as beat up as your last relationship, and wondered WHO LIVES LIKE THIS?? I get you're driving a 92 Honda P.O.S. but the booming system and Walmart "Rims" are a dead giveaway that you still live at home with your parents and call them your roommates. Anyway, We had a BLAST on our annual trip to Mardi Gras we caught all the beads, and had all th...

Have you ever wondered what else is out there? Me too, Like Lochness and chupacabra, UFO's ...ET.. Little long distance calling long neck bastard!! But in this instance, we're talking about dudes going overseas to find love, simply because females here are too independent, too self-assured, and honestly, we don't like to listen! Apparently, men still want that old fashion kind of girl who still gi...

Adam West could have definitely murdered more people than Dhamer, and Ted Bundy combined. He had the charisma, the car, and the Batusi. Plus, if he ever did get caught, he would have a great chance to get the insanity plea. Henry Cavill murders pussy with his accent alone. Leo DiCaprio murders the souls of old ladies {over 25 according to his standards}, because they know they'll never get on his...

Make a super advanced android that can perform all functions of a human being, but at a super precise and far superior level? "I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that." Do you want the end of mankind? Because, that's how you get the end of mankind. "Umm, it's PEOPLE-kind, thank you VERY much!!" Fuck off hardcore feminist, you're why a lot of guys would be happy to stick it in a terminator cover...

Cocaine in the butthole. It's the breakfast of champions! I haven't gotten a lot of compliments from the opposite sex in my time, strange or otherwise. I can only imagine the crazy shit you ladies get from guys. "Hey girls, I'll bet your nips are pink and tough like your weenus. Can I touch any of the three with my mouth meat?" "Yo Ma, I hope you have a W-2 in those pants, 'cause I'm 'bout to tax...

Let me ask you a question. If you saw a 400 pound man at McD's, and he ate a whole bunch of cheeseburgers, would you applaud him for being "stunning and brave"? Of course not, he's a gluttonous fat fuck! Same thing for women taking a whole bunch of dicks. It requires no effort, and shows a lack of self control. Now, I support a person's decision to do either one, as long as they realize that there...

I may not be great at geography, but I know that I'm exactly where I need to be if shit pops off. Zombies, hurricanes, floods, and cotton-headed ninny muggins who don't like guns hold no sway here. Enjoy Buc-ee's, grab some Whataburger, visit your own kind in Austin if you feel homesick, then get the fuck out! Unless, you decide to un-cunt yourself. In which case, pick up a new AR, enjoy some bris...

When you look at your Boyfriend, Girlfriend, Spouse, Partner, whatever. What was the moment you realized you were in love with them? Some people believe in love at first sight. BUT not Jay, he's under the impression that love doesn't really happen till the golden age. Me personally, I know better and think he's lucky he's so fucking cute, and that Piggums the Pitbull is obsessed with him. Email jn...

Email: jnj.peoplearetheworst@gmail.com Happy New Year, May 2023 bring you much prosperity and love, and most of all lots of hot dirty sexuals! Have you ever have someone say something so off the wall dumb that you wonder who walks around telling this person to blink every few seconds? This week we're going to go over some of the things we still can't believe some people say to us. When we say some...

They don't call him the King of Cunt-tree for nothing. George could have a whole national forest of one-hitter-quitter labia redwoods, some of them old enough to be petrified by now. He just had it like that, though. No tricks, nor no real strategy needed. Fast forward to modern times, and now we have Mr. Johnson displaying how the game has changed. These days, you need every advantage you can get...

Whats Yo Sign? Hu? Nevermind I don't give a Fu*k. It's the worst pick up line, it's also the worst thing to base someones piss poor personality on. Get your life together and stop telling people when you're late for everything it's because your Cancer is in murcury rising or in Aries fucking moon. If your Zodiac isn't a part of figuring out who the serial killer is I don't want it! Other than that...

Email jnj.peoplearetheworst@gmail.com I cross my heart, and promise you, that George laid pipe in the girl from "The Chair" that very night. He didn't even have to be that smooth to do it either. He could have walked over there and said, "Hey there, Darlin'. How are you?", and he's still getting a snail trail on his Captain Marvelous that night. Tell me I'm lying! On the flip side, us normal morta...