It’s Not About the Sex

In this up close and personal episode, Andrew and Sue explore the challenges associated with asking for help. Andrew reviews his 30-year journey of not only learning how to ask for help but becoming more and more comfortable seeking consultation from trusted friends, colleagues and mentors. To contact Andrew please do so through his website: https://westsidetherapist.com

As a certified life and recovery coach, Linda works extensively with couples interested in revitalizing their intimate, sexual connection. With a focus on deeper contact to self and to one another, Linda shares her respectful approach to couples in recovery including somatic tools, mindfulness and “homeplay” that she suggests for practice between sessions. With many years of personal and professio...

 Andrew and Sue discuss their recent experience on Santa Monica Beach entitled “MindTravel”. In this episode, they re-visit the theme of forgiveness which was the focal point of this multi-sensory experience. Spiritual? Metaphysical? Psychological? All of the above were present during this highly-creative experiential evening.

In this episode we discuss sexual integrity based on Dr. Davidson’s book of the same name. We also take a fresh look at the depathologizing language of compulsive sexual behavior rather than sex addiction. Dr. Davidson shares his direct, psycho-educational approach to working with couples to help them expand their capacity for discussing and exploring sex in safe and productive ways.

Did you know that the term Positive Psychology was coined less than twenty-five years ago? Although it’s one of the newer additions to the mental health field, it has taken its place as a refreshing, optimistic approach to life fulfillment. In today’s episode we take a look at its connection to coaching as well as a comparison with the Twelve Steps and psychotherapy.

Mindful self-compassion has taken the world by storm as a power tool for wellness and self-acceptance. Borrowing from the Self-Compassion. Break developed by Chris Germer and Kristin Neff, Andrew walks you through this exercise which provides a valuable way to speak to yourself kindly and mindfully.

To celebrate our 75th episode, we turn the tables on our podcast producer, Sue Merlino as we discuss her career which has involved several twists and turns but always comes back to both storytelling and connection. As a close friend and collaborator for the past 37 years, Sue and Andrew take a stroll down memory lane as well as a mindful chat about purpose and direction.

Dr. Edison DeMello, an integrative physician and author of the recent groundbreaking book Bloated ? joins us for an informative, mind-body-spirit discussion about how addictive, compulsive behaviors can be related to the gut.  He normalizes the shame often attached to painful gastrointestinal issues while offering practical healing strategies. Listen to Dr. DeMello’s depth of expertise and refresh...

Today’s episode entitled Brainspotting: A Step by Step Approach goes behind the scenes and into an actual session. Although it’s a worldwide phenomenon utilized in more than 70 countries, Brainspotting remains a mystery to many. In this episode Andrew and Sue offer a step by step demonstration of the standard sequence used in this healing process.

Today we welcome Dr. Eva Altobelli, a Santa Monica-based addiction psychiatrist and psychedelics expert who speaks openly about the therapeutic use of psilocybin, ketamine and MDMA. This discussion clarifies both the controversy and the research-based direction the clinical community is moving.

Dual Diagnosis? Co-occurring Disorders? Today we explore how these terms originated and how they are commonly used within the medical model. Because they don’t take into account the complexities of trauma, nervous system regulation and attachment ruptures, these terms are limited in their scope and relevance. Tune in to this honest conversation about the multi-faceted, multi-layered approach to tr...

In this episode we welcome Dr. Mel Pohl, a seasoned addiction and chronic pain physician in the field for more than forty years. He is the Senior Medical Consultant at the Pointe Malibu Recovery Center, Clinical Assistant Professor at the University of Nevada and author of two valuable books focusing on pain management. Together we discuss the challenges and opportunities related to chronic pain r...

Today Andrew offers a short, guided imagery called A Day at the Beach. Take this opportunity to give yourself a few minutes to visit a favorite place from your past—a mini-vacation of relaxation.

In this episode Andrew and Sue travel behind the scenes of group therapy to take a closer look at the opportunity to learn about oneself side-by- side with others invested in growing together. Group therapy is one of the most  cost-effective and underutilized forms of deeper healing. Join this vital conversation to get a glimpse into this often-misunderstood therapeutic experience. GPALA.org    AG...

Today we welcome Mellissa McCracken who brings an elegant combination of experience, expertise, compassion, and clarity to this complicated subject with a focus on men who have sex with men. Utilizing a practical, harm-reduction approach, clients benefit from an open-minded, holistic method to establishing longer-term recovery and healing.

Today’s episode features Dr. Lucy Postolov who discusses how trauma is treated through Chinese Medicine. Lucy talks about the art and science of Chinese Medicine and acupuncture and how she conceptualizes and treats both physical and emotional trauma. With thirty-five years of experience, Lucy brings an extraordinary depth of experience to this episode as well as to her colleagues and patients. 

Today Andrew offers a short, guided visualization traditionally called A Safe Place which he renamed A Peaceful Place. Take this opportunity to give yourself a few minutes to visit a favorite place from your past—a mini-vacation of relaxation.

On today’s episode psychotherapist Bill Herring joins us from Atlanta as he introduces us to the Problematic Sexual Behavior (PSB) framework he developed. Bill explores a non-pathologizing, refreshing perspective he applies to all sexual behaviors that have become problematic. Tune in to understand the five concise components often related to compulsive sexual behavior, porn struggles and chronic...

Today’s episode features Dr. Shane Kraus, a clinical psychologist and Assistant Professor at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas. Shane was instrumental in the development of the World Health Organization’s recent classification of Compulsive Sexual Behavior Disorder (CSBD). In this conversation he also shares his perspective on “moral incongruence”. Tune in to hear a research-based, grounded view...

Another Valentine’s Day, another opportunity to re-visit our blueprints of giving and receiving love. In this intimate conversation, Andrew and Sue examine their love languages derived from the bestselling book, The Five Love Languages. Take the brief quiz at www.5lovelanguages.com which reveals how you feel most loved and desired. Keep in mind that these languages not only apply to romantic partn...

Nowadays you hear more and more about gratitude, but how do you integrate it into your daily life? In this episode Andrew leads you through a 5-minute guided imagery focusing on appreciation of life, yourself and loved ones. This may be a valuable reminder or possibly a kickstart for a gratitude practice.

Today we welcome Robyn Goldberg, RDN, CEDRD-S, registered dietician and author who helps us understand eating disorders and disordered eating in a friendly, easy-to-digest manner. With more than two decades of experience, Robyn brings a rare depth of experience as she discusses the profound suffering sometimes associated with food, body image and intimacy issues. Robyn can be reached on her websit...

Loneliness is everywhere. It’s a form of invisible suffering that is a universal part of being human. It’s also a trigger toward compulsive sex and possibly the fantasy to be rescued. We’re all lonely at one time or another, but how we respond to the loneliness is the key. Responding with acceptance, understanding and compassion will ease the pain inside. Cultivate emotionally-dependable connectio...

Today, Duane talks with Andrew Susskind about his book, It's Not About the Sex: Moving from Isolation to Intimacy after Sexual Addiction. They go into depth about attachment, emotional regulation, the need for reliable people to heal your traumatic wounds, and how we can do that when we're in recovery and still struggling with internal chaos.

Scratch the surface of compulsive sexual behavior and you’ll find intimacy avoidance. Andrew and Sue take a closer look at what is often referred to as love avoidance (aka avoidant attachment pattern) which acts as a survival strategy but eventually outlasts its purpose. Tune in to discover how this attachment style may apply to you.