It's All My Fault

This one includes... moments that I will have to stand by. As do they all. This one also has some moments that I will choose to stand by. As do most. Any "aspire to stand astride" moments to be had in this one you naturally inquire??? Soooooo unlikely given my past data points that have assembled to create the very inquiry you're presenting in its current manifestation. With all that working as if...

As if from a dream, yesterday, combustible "pops-his-mouth-off-when-he-should't" John woke up to an issue with AT&T that led to an immediate divorce. Less than two hours of consicous time and BAM! No phone. No internet. No meaning as a white male American in the 21st century. BAM! BAM! BAM! Thank you Sir! May we never have another? BAM! And then the day got interesting... NëiNsensiCaL Episode...

Does looking into the past prevent one from taking full advantage of the future that's right in front of them? As with most of life's ponderings, this one is a little column A and even more column B, but knowing which column is which takes the wisdom gained in pursuit of both. With that much to sort out you'd think I'd have gotten around to the core argument I wanted to make when I started this re...

Two steps forward, one step back, one slip sideways before you trip on your ass... and then you turn yourself around to find out: "that's what it's all about"! Doing the hokey-pokey is about as apt a metaphor for the life I've got going on lately as is anything else pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey-ish. At least I'm no longer the pinata at a pinata party eh Juanito? Si. Si si si si mucho si senor. Okay....

Are you ready for some football? Presuming, of course, that we're speaking in American 21st century cultural sport slang... the one where football is played with a prolate spheroid and pits steroid-fueled madmen against each other in a gladiator-like setting as drunken Las Vegas visitors morph into rabid observers salivating over the violent action as well as their jalapeno poppers who join living...

This recording was an arduous process to complete. An extra day was required just to sort out my take on all of it. For now, this raw assessment will have to suffice. Refined analyses will, hopefully, be forthcoming. As my clarity evolves around these issues... muddy messes they create and all. No promise on that future clarity... just to be clear about potential clarity. In fact, I haven't even r...

How are things going for you these days? Befuddled by that question have I been for... something like 100 days. That gap harkens back to November 1st of last year. Which feels about right. I know this much: whatever lull of life I lollygagged my way into lately has come to an end. No more wound licking. There's too much to attend to around here to worry about the bruises life hands out with indisc...

So... whatcha up to? Wanna go to Ethiopia with me? We could dig up all the secrets to humanity's ancient mysteries while we're there...? Seriously. The cache of artifacts awaiting discovery in Ethiopia will certainly be hailed as the greatest leap forward in human understanding ever! So you're in? Awesome. More diggers more discoveries I always say. Wate wut? You're asking if we'll get phone cover...

I sometimes think "how different my life would be" if I had been born female. Then, I might even think how DRASTICALLY different my life would be if I had been born a minority female. Which could lead me to think how UNBELIEVABLY different my life would be if I had been born female and a minority and then discovered myself 2Be Condoleezza Rice . Not so much the part about being black now instead o...

In this recording: I crumble under the pressure of an imaginary red-wine-on-white-carpet-moment. I eventually slather my way through a mispronunciation of splatter. At some point I feel compelled to one-up my 15 year old virgin self. After which, on full display my terrible basketball skills are. And then it's all downhill. If I were to bottom-line this recording in no more than 19 characters (inc...

My personal (and totally unexpected) reckoning with angels of the guardian variety has never been comfortable territory for me to wander within. That's the f'n point you misguided boo-hoo-boy. Point taken. I figure that's why LME, my TGA , manifested in a full blown bout of delusional schizophrenia sprinkled with a healthy portion of oppositional defiance disorder. when she arrived to help me cour...

Happy Birthday Dad! Wishing my 84 year old father "good cheer" seems an appropriate place to start today... it being his birthday and all. Why, then, did I start this day's actual recording with a somewhat pathetic apology for the pile of hong kong phooey that ensues? Rather than paying recognition to the man who brought you into existence? Well... one factor might be how high I am. Ok. Obviously...

I Voted Today! buttons are not among my collection. Why you ask considering all the other buttons in my collection? Well... embarrassnigly or admirably - however it is that you want to perceive it - I've never voted in the United States of America. Or at least I don't think I have. Duh!!! That's why It's All My Fault . Or at least that's what I've heard... maybe there's more to the story. May. Be....

Wow have I been lazy to start this year or what? Seriously. I guess I needed a little of that "hibernation" routine. To see if I'm, in fact, a bear in "meat suit" clothing. It turns out, that I am not. Having come to this realization, well... I decided it was time to embrace my homo sapien sapien build v.8675309 Earth self again and get the f'k out of my bedroom. In doing so, I grabbed the notes I...

This recording is the very definition of an out of control junk drawer. And the worst part is that I knew I was muttering clutter and still couldn't help letting it turn into a full blown catastrophe . Boo!!!! And then in a little "me being me" moment, I end up assigning you the job of fixing all the stuff I messed up in getting us here. Well... assigning might be too strong... but encouraging you...

I admit I've had a rather frictionless ride through life thus far. As such I've been preparing for the losses we all inevitably suffer, at least as much as one can do something like that in any meaningful way. That certainly doesn't make the untimely passing of Ms. Lilly Mae Eaton any less impactful, nor any less devastating. But the wisdom and meaning available to mine in this condition... well i...

When one boasts openly that they can't recall the last time they experienced a "dark day" - well one should immediately locate all flashlights and any candles on hand because whoa buddy whoa - darkness is falling. Like now. Right now. Okay, maybe as late as tomorrow. But find those candles now. Making statements that come back and bite me in the ass is monkey buckets of fun. I know I've shown cons...

I planned on asking you to kindly overlook the mediocrity my current existence is determined to foist upon thee but that seemed like an offer you'd be savvy enough to refuse. So screw that plan! In fact, executing direct opposite maneuver now am I. Instead of pandering for your sympathy, how about you hold this recent string of lackluster lollipops against me. With prejudice. A free upgrade to EXT...

Are YOU kidding me ? Episode number 444??? ... ??? Is this as big a shock to you as it is to me? Bigger? Yeah! Totally. Toe. Tully. Which is why I didn't bother re-listening to this one. I figure arriving here as we have, at recording four hundred forty-four is enough of an accomplishment. It exceeds every expectation I had. Buy-A-Lot. So impressed am I with this overall effort of mine that I felt...

Usually I can claim, with honor, my scattershot approach to the recordings I'm laying down. This might be the rare exception to that bluster. I go so far as to preface it with a bit of tither/tather that likely does nothing to relate to my final message. Since I know not what that is, I'll just say - are you seriously going to proceed at this point? Seriously? ??? NëiNsensiCaL Episode 19 of 53

I don't know that I've fully emerged from my lethargic funk... but I'm certainly headed that direction. Not that the 30 minutes of useless blather contained herein will reflect this new found motivation... that is so not like me... as you likely already know. NëiNsensiCaL Episode 18 of 53

Still not settled on my new year's complacency motivations I decide to drill down the Guardian Angel's current influence in my life... and how that might just be the rootroute2reboot my laziness. And then I talk about some other stuff that probably isn't very interesting. And then it gets worse. So... yeah. Pretty, pretty, pretty easy choice ... on this one. NëiNsensiCaL Episode 17 of 53

My continued investigation into our ancient past continues - mostly unabated - but not completely. As per my usual abatements, well, those might be the only worthwhile elements herein - presuming worthwhile means to you the same that it does to me. Shall we presume?? Shall we? NëiNsensiCaL Episode 16 of 53

Apparently I needed a "shut-it-all-down" break from the universe for a few days. So I took one. Now however, that phase is over. On to bigger and better nonsense go I. And you too, if you're up for it! NëiNsensiCaL Episode 15 of 53

There is no excuse for me telling you, even a little bit, how to go about fulfilling your life. Not even a little bit. This recording is almost 55 minutes long. If I had to guess how much time I spend in this one telling you exactly how you should go about living your life... assuming you want it to be fulfilling? 31:41. Having admitted that I think I can just finish typing these words now. But be...