Intimate Judaism

October 7 changed countless lives. But for many Jewish people across the world, the deeper challenge has been what came afterward: months and years of ongoing stress, uncertainty, grief, and vigilance. In this episode, Talli Rosenbaum and Rabbi Scott Kahn explore how chronic stress affects relationships, intimacy, and sexuality, and why connection remains one of our most important sources of resil...

How should Orthodox educators address masturbation with teenage boys—and what happens when the message is only about prohibition? Dr. Dan Jacobson offers a thoughtful, experience-based approach that balances halacha, mental health, and the lived reality of adolescents, focusing on reducing shame, fostering responsibility, and speaking about sexuality in a healthier, more honest way. To download a...

When observing the laws pertaining to niddah, women are often taught not to look at their bodily discharges, to avoid becoming niddah. With our guests Lisa Septimus and Malka Chana Amichai, we explore the halachic logic behind "don't look," the tension it creates with body awareness, and whether halacha undermines or advances body literacy.

In this Q&A episode of Intimate Judaism, we respond to honest questions about desire, restraint, identity, mental health, and intimacy within Jewish life. We touch on topics including bisexuality, workplace boundaries, what is permitted within marital intimacy, postpartum depression and low desire, shmirat einayim, and even whether leaving the lights on matters. Throughout, we focus on integrating...

In this episode, we explore the many reasons men may avoid sexual intimacy. Challenging the myth of the "always-ready" husband, this episode explores the physical, psychological, relational, and religious factors that shape male sexuality. We discuss she impact of sexual guilt, shame, performance anxiety and trauma on sexual motivation and function, and offer guidelines for reconnection with compa...

How can Jewish educators guide teens through questions about bodies, desire, and values without shame or fear? Talli and Scott sit down with Shuli Taubes to discuss why high school education about sex and sexual ethics matters, what healthy frameworks look like, and how schools can partner with parents to raise confident, thoughtful, and compassionate young adults.

In this premiere episode of the eighth season of Intimate Judaism, we collaborated with  Together in Happiness, an organization dedicated to helping couples navigate marriage. Together, we are releasing a recording of a lecture delivered by cohost Talli Rosenbaum. In this talk, Talli discusses how Jewish marriage mirrors the relationship of the Jewish people with God, and draws upon the concepts o...

Dr. Sara Glass, author of "Kissing Girls on Shabbat" was raised in the Hasidic community of Gur. Today, she is trauma therapist, identifies as queer, and though she is no longer religious herself,  works with women along the religious and LGBTQ spectrum.  We spoke to Sara about the risks and dangers of sexual experimentation when leaving religious life, and the complexities of integrating being ga...

How do we talk to our kids about sex in a way that's honest, healthy, and grounded in Jewish values? In this episode of Intimate Judaism, Talli and Scott speak with Yonina Rubinstein to explore how parents can approach conversations about sexuality with sensitivity, clarity, and confidence. We discuss practical strategies for different ages and stages, the importance of modeling a positive attitud...

Orthodox girls and women are traditionally taught to dress modestly in order to avoid attracting the male gaze and to keep men from sinful thoughts or behaviors. These messages, according to Rabbanit Oriya Mevorach, an educator and doctoral student of Gender and Philosophy, objectify and sexualize women and girls, and are actually influenced by Western society's sexuality discourse. Moreover, the...

If you are on the autism spectrum, or know or suspect your spouse may be, intimacy and communication may present challenges. In this episode, Talli and Rabbi Scott speak with Tzippora Price, an expert on neurodivergent couples, to learn more. They identify some of the behaviors associated with Autism Spectrum Disorder, as well as some challenges that may occur when one spouse is neurodivergent (an...

In this episode, Talli Rosenbaum and Rabbi Scott Kahn blend Jewish wisdom with modern psychology to explore marital doubt, intimacy challenges, and when to stay or go. Tune in for practical insights on transforming even the most challenging relationships.

Many contemporary how-to guides to Jewish marriage in the Orthodox world encourage husbands to shoulder full responsibility for their wives' happiness at the expense of their own. In the yeshiva world this is known as  "being mevater."  Though teaching young  men to be unconditionally kind and respectful to their wives sounds progressive, Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum discuss the potential...

Choosing a marriage partner is one of the most important decisions one makes in life. Yet the process of dating, building a relationship and deciding to marry requires time and good relational skills. Listen as Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum discuss dating and getting engaged.

In our latest Q&A episode, Talli and Scott address some of the many questions submitted by listeners regarding Judaism and intimacy. Among the issues they discuss are repairing sexuality after 15 years of "doing it wrong," consensual threesomes, sex therapy versus couples therapy, when a wife wants sex more than her husband, tubal ligation, looking at porn to get in the mood, and much more. To wat...

According to Rav Yoni Rosensweig,  founder of Maagalei Nefesh, an organization that confronts issues pertaining to mental health and halacha, "Jewish law is not meant to cause harm."  War, mental health concerns, and emotional and relational distress are factors that contribute to the need to seek leniencies in halachic practice in a way that reduces, rather than increases, potential harm. Listen...

The discourse on marital intimacy and sexuality in Judaism has become a normative topic of conversation. Rabbanit Shayna Goldberg, an educator and spiritual advisor at Migdal Oz, a Midrasha of higher learning for young women in Gush Etzion, believes that conversations about desire, sex and sexuality are relevant for unmarried women as well, and not just as part of premarital education after they h...

Losing one's spouse is one of life's most difficult and painful experiences. The process of grieving includes feelings of loneliness, abandonment, and isolation. While grieving the loss of a spouse, one also mourns the loss of identity as a member of an intimate partnership and acceptance of a new identity as a widow/er. Well-intentioned friends and family members may urge those who have lost a sp...

The infamous "Sex Strike" was recently spearheaded by influencer Adina Miles, AKA "Flatbush Girl,"  in order to apply communal pressure to men and their rabbis to free Malky Berkowitz, who has been refused a get for four years. This initiative has created a great deal of outrage in Jewish Orthodox communities, and the "responsa" on social media platforms has been passionate and robust. Some have e...

After October 7th, Jews around the world have felt besieged by some erstwhile allies, as some have been silent in the face of rampant antisemitism, and others have openly supported Hamas and its genocidal goals. While there have been many who openly support Jews and Israel, the war in Gaza has also provided a moment of reckoning as we discovered some unhappy surprises about people we thought were...

In many Orthodox communities, premarital sex education taught by Kallah teachers is limited to ensuring wedding night "success" and encouraging strict observance of Nidah laws in order to "guarantee" sexual satisfaction.  Join Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum as they interview two Kallah instructors, Dr. Hadassah Fromson and Dr. Yosefa Wruble, who discuss how they integrate discussions about s...

In last month's episode, we discussed many of the physical, psychological and social factors that can contribute to sexual desire discrepancy in couples. This month, we are taking a deep dive in to the role of emotional intimacy, attachment styles and relational dynamics on desire. Joining us is expert Dr. Laurie Watson, sex therapist, author, and co-host of the popular Foreplay Radio podcast.

When there are desire discrepancies between couples, women are often identified as the partner with less sexual desire. Yet the experience of desire may be different for men and women, and the expectation that desire should be equally matched can create feelings of frustration and rejection. The right question may not be "Why doesn't she want?" but rather, "What does she want and how does she want...

As Jews in Israel and worldwide absorb the realities of the horrors of threat, murder and violation, it seems surreal to think or talk about intimacy. Yet, in the face of threat, the safety and security of a committed partnership can be a comforting resource. And in the confrontation with death, people sometimes seek the vitality and life affirming energy that sexual relations provide. Join Rabbi...

A podcast hosted by an Orthodox comedian recently featured a controversial interview with a child sex offender.  In response, Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum created a panel to discuss whether there are potential benefits to learning more about people who struggle with attraction to minors and do not offend, as well as those who do. (This episode contains explicit material regarding sexual ab...