Intelligent Intoxication

When we PRESSURE ourselves to have or express an OPINION, we are forcing ourselves to form and share a deeply-rooted belief.  I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice pressuring yourself to have the same opinions as others? When do you notice hiding your real opinions? Which are your strongest opinions? What prevents you from considering the opinions of others? When do you pret...

When we PRESSURE ourselves to UNDERSTAND, we attempt to force or push meaning.  I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice putting pressure on yourself to understand something that’s happened in the past? When do you grasp for the reasons behind the circumstances in your life? When do you notice creating negative meanings for someone’s actions or words? What benefits do you get f...

Psychotherapist and best-selling author helps her students and clients manage these five types of Inner Critics: Restless Inadequate Perfectionist Guilty Victim We must be willing to identify and work with our Inner Critics or these voices and fear patterns will control your: thoughts feelings actions experiences relationships I invite you to consider these questions: What flavor (s) of Inner Crit...

Psychotherapist and best-selling author helps her students and clients manage these five types of Inner Critics: Restless Inadequate Perfectionist Guilty Victim “The VICTIM Inner Critic has a pervasive sense of helplessness and will convince you that life is really, really hard!  You can’t be happy or fulfilled until other people change or treat you better.  The Victim Inner Critic makes excuses f...

Psychotherapist and best-selling author helps her students and clients manage these five types of Inner Critics: Restless Inadequate Perfectionist Guilty Victim “The GUILTY Inner Critic makes you feel like everything is your fault.  You hold onto all the mistakes of your past, and all the times you have hurt or disappointed someone.  You  punish yourself for what your Guilty Inner Critic tells you...

Psychotherapist and best-selling author helps her students and clients manage these five types of Inner Critics: Restless Inadequate Perfectionist Guilty Victim “The PERFECTIONIST Inner Critic keeps you dependent on constant achievement in order for you to feel worthy and validated.  You believe if you don’t succeed, you are flawed, inferior, incompetent and inadequate.  Your Perfectionist Inner C...

Psychotherapist and best-selling author helps her students and clients manage these five types of Inner Critics: Restless Inadequate Perfectionist Guilty Victim “The INADEQUATE Inner Critic makes you feel like no matter how much effort you put into anything, you do it better. Even if your life is good, you feel that it isn't at the level that it could be. You are always looking at what you need to...

Psychotherapist and best-selling author helps her students and clients manage these five types of Inner Critics: Restless Inadequate Perfectionist Guilty Victim “The RESTLESS Inner Critic keeps you constantly in search of greater excitement in the next activity. You are rarely at peace or content with the activity you’re doing. You are easily distracted and scattered. You stay busy and are always...

Fear is part of the decision-making process. Fear does not mean to quit or that you’ve made a “bad” or “wrong” decision. Fear lets you know that your Inner Critic is triggered by your decision.  I invite you to consider these questions: How do you make decisions?  What is your Inner Critic trying to protect you from? What do the sensations of fear feel like in your body? Where in your body do you...

Just because others offer to help you, doesn’t mean that you’re obligated to accept the help.  I invite you to consider these questions: When do you say YES to help even when you don’t need it or want it? When do you accept help and feel resentful or frustrated? What prevents you from graciously declining unneeded or unwanted help? If you have something you’d really love to hear on the podcast, I...

I love to group my daily/weekly tasks into these categories: call/texts/emails errands home chores work tasks When I’m planning for an event, gathering, or party, I group my tasks into: things to get things to finish things to stage/prep things to clean I invite you to consider these questions: Which things do you need to “get”? Which tasks do you need to “finish”? Which things do you need to “cle...

There is a huge difference between tasks that “you can only do” and tasks that others can do for you.   I invite you to consider these questions: Which tasks can “only you only do”? Which tasks are genuinely enjoyable for you to do? Which tasks can others do for you? Which tasks can you hire someone to do? If you have something you’d really love to hear on the podcast, I would be giddy and gratefu...

There is a huge difference between tasks that we can complete quickly versus tasks that require a slow, consistent pace.   I invite you to consider these questions: Which tasks can you do quickly? Which tasks require more focus and a slower pace? When do you notice feeling frustrated that you can’t move more quickly? When do you notice feeling frustrated that you can’t move at a slower pace? Where...

There is a huge difference between tasks that we can do on “automatic pilot” versus tasks that require focus and decision-making.  I invite you to consider these questions: Which tasks can you do on auto-pilot? Which tasks require many decisions? Which tasks will require your full focus? If you have something you’d really love to hear on the podcast, I would be giddy and grateful to hear all about...

In order to enhance and empower your well-being, you must pay attention to and honor these four B’s: Borders: where you end and someone else begins.  Boundaries: what you are requesting others do or not do AND how you will respond if others aren’t willing or able to meet our requests.  Bright Lines: what you will or won’t do.  Baselines: the minimum amount you’re willing to commit to.  I invite yo...

In order to enhance and empower your well-being, you must pay attention to and honor these four B’s: Borders: where you end and someone else begins.  Boundaries: what you are requesting others do or not do AND how you will respond if others aren’t willing or able to meet our requests.  Bright Lines: what you will or won’t do.  Baselines: the minimum amount you’re willing to commit to.  I invite yo...

In order to enhance and empower your well-being, you must pay attention to and honor these four B’s: Borders: where you end and someone else begins.  Boundaries: what you are requesting others do or not do AND how you will respond if others aren’t willing or able to meet our requests.  Bright Lines: what you will or won’t do.  Baselines: the minimum amount you’re willing to commit to.  I invite yo...

In order to enhance and empower your well-being, you must pay attention to and honor these four B’s: Borders: where you end and someone else begins.  Boundaries: what you are requesting others do or not do AND how you will respond if others aren’t willing or able to meet our requests.  Bright Lines: what you will or won’t do.  Baselines: the minimum amount you’re willing to commit to.  I invite yo...

Our NEEDS are our requirements as human beings: certainty uncertainty significance love and connection growth contribution “If you have a need to contribute, you will likely make a big difference in your community. However, you can lose sight of the fact that giving begins at home and neglect those closest to you as you change the world.” Tony Robbins I invite you to consider these questions: How...

Our NEEDS are our requirements as human beings: certainty uncertainty significance love and connection growth contribution “Those whose foremost core need is growth are always striving to be better and learn more. They are very good at their jobs, but tend to move on quickly as soon as they believe they’ve reached their full potential. Though their constant striving for betterment ensures they wil...

Our NEEDS are our requirements as human beings: certainty uncertainty significance love and connection growth contribution “If connection/love is your top basic human need, you are constantly seeking out a close relationship with someone or something… people need love, and this can lead to some incredibly fulfilling relationships – but it can also cause you to sacrifice self-care in order to take...

Our NEEDS are our requirements as human beings: certainty uncertainty significance love and connection growth contribution “If significance is among the top two of your 6 human needs, then part of meeting that need includes receiving recognition. This translates into a desire to be seen, heard and listened to – in short, you want to be noticed. You measure significance by what you believe makes yo...

Our NEEDS are our requirements as human beings: certainty uncertainty significance love and connection growth contribution “Though it’s important to understand the beauty of uncertainty , those who experience this as one of their top basic human needs can take it to an extreme. They engage in frequent job or relationship changes for the sake of variety, or take unnecessary risks to achieve the adr...

Our NEEDS are our requirements as human beings: certainty uncertainty significance love and connection growth contribution “If certainty is one of your core needs, you need to feel secure and safe about the future.” We need certainty that we can avoid pain and seek pleasure.  I invite you to consider these questions: What type of pain do you strive to avoid? What type of pleasure are you desperate...

“Why do we do the things we do? Why is it that we measure success and value by attention and status, yet frown upon complacency? What force drives and shapes all of our emotions, actions, quality of life and, ultimately, our destinies? Did you know that the answers to these questions can all be explained by learning about the 6 human needs?” Tony Robbins Our NEEDS are our requirements as human bei...