Intelligent Intoxication

When we “quit”, we unintentionally stop doing something in spite of NOT liking our reasons. If you stop or decide not to finish something AND you like your reasons, you aren’t quitting - you course-correcting, pivoting, or pausing.  I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice “quitting” when you get frustrated even when you don’t like your reasons? How willing are you to pause or...

When our children finally leave home, the best gift we can give them is the comfort of knowing we, too, are moving on with our next chapters by intentionally create meaningful, fulfilling lives.  I invite you to consider these questions: How willing are you to intentionally create a new chapter in your own life? What might prevent you from doing so? If you have something you’d really love to hear...

When you notice feeling stressed or overwhelmed about everything on your “to-do list”, try this: Make a list of everything you believe must be done.  Then, place each task under one of four categories: HAVE TO DO/DON’T WANT TO DO: If you can’t delegate these tasks, tackle these items when you’re most focused and rested.  HAVE TO DO/WANT TO DO: You can do these things any time because you’re motiva...

We will all experience “triggering” moments. Sometimes, we’re reacting to something that happened to us in the past now in the present moment.  When you’re triggered, ask yourself: What age of you is triggered right now? I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice reacting in the present moment because of something that happened in the past? How willing are you to have your own ba...

We all have dramatic thoughts regarding things happening TO us. You can’t control having these thoughts the first time, but you can control whether or not you keep thinking them or whether you react to them and speak or act dramatically.  I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice fixating on dramatic thoughts? What do you notice reacting to your thoughts by saying or doing somet...

Your brain is motivated to: seek pleasure avoid pain do what’s easy You won’t have the motivation to do anything that is devoid of pleasure, painful, or difficult.  I invite you to consider these questions: What if you don’t have to be motivated, just decisive? What might prevent you from starting or stopping something you’ve decided to do?   If you have something you’d really love to hear on the...

You won’t be able to make sustainable shifts and progress if you aren’t willing to identify and manage the Inner Critic chatter in your head.  The Inner Critic will chatter any time you feel unsafe because something is uncertain, unpredictable, or uncontrollable.  I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice your Inner Critic chatter? How willing are you to manage the chatter?   If...

You may be in the habit of taking on the emotions of others if you feel emotionally saturated after spending time with them. Get in the habit of asking yourself: “Is this mine?” I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice taking on the emotions of other people? How do you take care of yourself when you’re saturated? How willing are you to adjust the amount of time you spend with c...

There’s a huge difference between offering someone sympathy versus offering someone empathy. When we feel sympathy, we pity another person and feel sorry for them. When we feel empathy, we try to imagine what it’s like to be in their shoes and offer compassion to them.  I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice pitying other people? How willing are you to offer compassion, rathe...

There are many things I wish I had known when I was 25 that I do know as a 55-year-old woman.  It’s appropriate to feel guilty when our actions and words don’t match our values. When our outsides don’t match our insides, we are temporarily out of integrity. But when we’re IN integrity but not willing or able to meet the expectations of others, we will feel uncomfortable knowing that someone is dis...

There are many things I wish I had known when I was 25 that I do know as a 55-year-old woman.  I wish I would have known that it’s more important to subtract things, rather than add things, when we’re trying to improve our lives. Start by telling yourself the truth about what you do and don’t want, and then be willing to let go of anything you don’t want because it doesn’t align with who you reall...

When we feel “broken”, it is often because we’ve told ourselves that in some way we are “damaged, fractured, or not whole”. But, only things can be broken - people cannot. You were born and still are 100% whole and worthy. So, your goal is to remove any thought or belief that prevents you from remembering your inherent wholeness.  I invite you to consider these questions: What might prevent you fr...

When we feel “broken”, it is often because we’ve told ourselves that in some way we are “damaged, fractured, or not whole”. But, only things can be broken - people cannot. You were born and still are 100% whole and worthy. So, your goal is to remove any thought or belief that prevents you from remembering your inherent wholeness.  I invite you to consider these questions: How willing are you to he...

When we feel “broken”, it is often because we’ve told ourselves that in some way we are “damaged, fractured, or not whole”. But, only things can be broken - people cannot. You were born and still are 100% whole and worthy. So, your goal is to remove any thought or belief that prevents you from remembering your inherent wholeness.  I invite you to consider these questions: What weaknesses, flaws, o...

When we feel “broken”, it is often because we’ve told ourselves that in some way we are “damaged, fractured, or not whole”. But, only things can be broken - people cannot. You were born and still are 100% whole and worthy. So, your goal is to remove any thought or belief that prevents you from remembering your inherent wholeness.  I invite you to consider these questions: How do you define WHOLENE...

When we feel “broken”, it is often because we’ve told ourselves that in some way we are “damaged, fractured, or not whole”. But, only things can be broken - people cannot. You were born and still are 100% whole and worthy. So, your goal is to remove any thought or belief that prevents you from remembering your inherent wholeness.  I invite you to consider these questions: How do you define BROKEN?...

When we feel “broken”, it is often because we’ve told ourselves that in some way we are “damaged, fractured, or not whole”. But, only things can be broken - people cannot. You were born and still are 100% whole and worthy. So, our goal is to remove any thought or belief that prevents you from remembering your inherent wholeness.  I invite you to consider these questions: When have you noticed feel...

There will be times when you get triggered due to the words or actions of others. When anything feels too much, too fast, or too soon, your body will go into a stress response. We can’t avoid all triggers, nor can we avoid stress responses. However, it IS our responsibility to calm our bodies and close the stress cycles.  BEFORE you try to communicate in any manner with the other person, please pr...

When we are communicating a boundary to another person, we aren’t trying to get the other person to do what you want them to do - your intention is to meet your own needs.  I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice trying to “make” someone do what you want them to do? When do you notice trying to get your needs met?   If you have something you’d really love to hear on the podcas...

In Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life, author Byron Katie invites you to complete her “Judge Your Neighbor” exercise in order to get curious about a stressful situation with another person. There are 6 questions/prompts in her exercise.   Question #6: “What is it about this person and situation that you don’t ever want to experience again?” “I don’t ever want … “ "Judge Your...

In Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life, author Byron Katie invites you to complete her “Judge Your Neighbor” exercise in order to get curious about a stressful situation with another person. There are 6 questions/prompts in her exercise.   Question #5: “What did you really think of him/her in this situation?” “NAME is … “ "Judge Your Neighbor" Worksheet   If you have something...

In Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life, author Byron Katie invites you to complete her “Judge Your Neighbor” exercise in order to get curious about a stressful situation with another person. There are 6 questions/prompts in her exercise.   Question #4: “In order for you to be happy in this situation, what do you need him/her to think, say, feel, or do?” “I need NAME to … “ "Ju...

In Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life, author Byron Katie invites you to complete her “Judge Your Neighbor” exercise in order to get curious about a stressful situation with another person. There are 6 questions/prompts in her exercise.   Question #3: “In this situation, what advice would you offer him/her?” “He/she should/shouldn't … “ "Judge Your Neighbor" Worksheet   If yo...

In Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life, author Byron Katie invites you to complete her “Judge Your Neighbor” exercise in order to get curious about a stressful situation with another person. There are 6 questions/prompts in her exercise.   Question #2: “In this situation, how do you want him/her to change? What do you want him/her to do?” “I want NAME to … “ "Judge Your Neighb...

In Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life, author Byron Katie invites you to complete her “Judge Your Neighbor” exercise in order to get curious about a stressful situation with another person. There are 6 questions/prompts in her exercise.   Question #1: When you think of a stressful situation with someone, who angered, confused, hurt, saddened, or disappointed you, and why? “I...