Highly Sensitive, Happily Married

126  Is your significant other defensive? If so, you know how hard it can be on your communication as a couple, working through things that need to be addressed, and feeling connected. As I know from personal experience, it can really feel like a divisive wedge between you. And if you are anything like most of the highly sensitive women I work with, you’d love for that defensiveness to just disapp...

A special episode featuring 2 male guests, Casey Desharnais, a Men’s Depth Coach, and my husband Will– just a regular guy– for both you and your (willing) partner to listen to. To be the most successful partner and have a very connected and loving relationship, it requires the skill of being honest with oneself–of looking at what's going on inside yourself that may be leading to less-than-ski...

124  Feeling connected to your significant other is key to your marriage fulfillment as a highly sensitive woman, right? But with the very busy modern lives so many of have–with careers and homes to tend to, kids to care for, a social life to keep alive– we are likely to feel disconnection creeping in… And when we feel disconnected, we can start to feel resentful, and go about trying to feel more...

123  Feeling heard by your partner matters to most highly sensitive women in a big way–when it comes to the smaller daily interactions, or those bigger important conversations. We also tend to love it when our partner opens up to us and shares what's going on for them. In other words, we tend to really love having a culture of great listening and open sharing in our marriages. But it’s easy t...

122  If you feel stuck and in the same old patterns of pain, recurring situations or emotional reactions that never seem to improve your relationship–or you are just ready for faster positive change- this episode is for you. One of the hardest things for so many people is stopping patterns of interaction that hurt their relationship (like reacting super strongly, or being snippy with your partner)...

121 Our natural empathy as  HSPs can be a beautiful gift or big challenge in our relationships. I’ve heard from many a client that they feel their empathy is overwhelming and drags them down. I have seen how it can also lead to resentment and hard times in relationships. If you've ever had that experience,  the good news is your natural empathy can actually be used to build greater intimacy i...

#120 Today, we are re-visiting a foundational topic–one that many other marriage professionals do not address, but is essential to understand as an HSP–because it is the very SOURCE of so much that goes awry in our marriages--and the source of what makes them amazing, too. As humans we all come into this world having inherited a “set of equipment” that can make things really hard in love –if we do...

119  If you have been listening to this podcast and seeing only small improvements  (or none at all ) in your relationship, today’s topic is likely the crucial missing piece for you. Sadly, this really important topic tends to be MISSING from the conversation about having the kind of relationship we sensitive women really want with our partners–to our marriage’s detriment! We need to talk about an...

118  If you want to avoid falling into a “rut” – or are already in one in your relationship–this episode is for you.   We dive into a short review of why ruts (what I call "disenchantment") happen, and how they are actually just a phase that can, with your help,  propel you into something better than ever in your marriage: What I call "Real-Enchantment". This is a more mature,...

In this special bonus episode, you’ll hear directly from the mouths of past Treasured participants and clients (normal highly sensitive women just like you) about what things were like before coaching with me and how things changed in their marriages by working with me. Listen in to these inspiring stories and hear their words of encouragement to you! I hope you’ll leave this episode feeling a lot...

So many highly sensitive women fall into a habit of Overcare (see episode 93 to learn all about it), and it leads to a lot of annoyance, resentment and negativity in their relationships. Some months ago, my client Luanne was no different.  Until she came to work with me. Then she shifted it all , and is now truly enjoying her now husband and her life so much more–and feeling more peaceful than eve...

This is a special short episode about the best way to evolve your marriage as a HSP.  In it, you get to hear directly from 3 of my recent highly sensitive Treasured program graduates, Emma, Sonya, and Rockie about the power of healing our relationships in a community of supportive like-minded others.  They share what their experience in the Treasured group was like, how they felt nervous about a g...

116  If you feel like the love you once had in your relationship has faded (a little or a lot), and dissatisfaction and disappointment have  moved in,  you are in a phase of relationship I call disenchantment. And truth be told, finding yourself here is more the rule than the exception in modern relationships. But it doesn't have to be. Today you'll hear the 3 reasons why disenchantment...

115  Attraction. One of the funnest, most vitalizing, magical parts of love relationships. If you are like most women, you WANT to keep it alive in your marriage–or bring it back if it's faded. And you want it to go both wa ys: you want to feel attracted to your partner–and feel their attraction to you, too. Unfortunately, it is very common for feelings of attraction to seemingly fade over ti...

114  Are you making excuses for your significant other? Or are you genuinely accepting them and meeting them with understanding? Find out in this episode. You’ve heard me say it a lot: it IS important to accept our partner for who they are. But, if  accepting them feels to you more like you're resigning yourself to things not feeling good between you, or you feel like you’re having to tolerat...

113    If you find yourself asking, “ Did I marry the wrong person ?”, wondering if maybe there is someone better out there for you, or noticing a lot of what is not so great about your partner—or generally feeling dissatisfied with your marriage— this episode is for you. This is so common as highly sensitive people, not just because our partner's faults tend to loom large to us, but  because...

112   Many highly sensitive people tend towards perfectionism. Although perfectionism can make us feel successful in certain ways, it actually fuels an exhausting, self-worth-depleting cycle that does more harm than good in our lives and relationships. Today we dive into the whats, whys and hows of it. We look at WHY we fall into perfectionism (hint–it’s a protective strategy developed early on in...

111  Anger is not a bad emotion. It can be a useful fuel for positive change in our relationships. But in our modern relationships, it most often isn't… That’s because we tend to over-indulge in it, and react out of it. So it ends up doing more harm than good in our marriages. If you find yourself annoyed, frustrated, resentful, or angry somewhat often at your partner–and you think you may sh...

110  If you don't feel as appreciated in your relationship as you want to, you are not alone. Lots of highly sensitive women have shared with me that they feel the same. I want to help you turn that around. Because there's SO much to appreciate in all that you do and all that you are. And I want you to FEEL that. So today I share 5 tips to start shifting the very culture of your marriage...

109  Does your partner try to “fix” you when you're sad, or quickly tell you that it will  all be okay, make a joke ( or even ignore you)–instead of holding you or sitting lovingly with you while you cry or spill it all out–like you want him to? This is so common! So, if you don’t feel very emotionally supported by your partner when you are having a hard day or are upset–or if you wish he was...

108   If you’re a classic highly sensitive woman, you love a good deep conversation. But you may find you have less of them than you want to with your significant other.  Today I will help you change that, so you can have more of that intimate connection –via conversation–that you love.  In this episode I share one simple– but powerful –key to engaging your partner in meaningful conversations more...

107  If you’ve ever experienced the wonky hormones of PMS or perimenopause, you know they can impact how you feel and act with your loved ones–especially your significant other.  And if you’re highly sensitive, the effect of these hormonal times can be extra hard. If, at certain times of month, you feel more irritable, snippy, and averse to your husband, if you tend to have more arguments, or feel...

106  Feel resentful towards your partner sometimes? Find it hard to let go of his small or large wrongdoings –or things he’s done in the past? If so, you’re holding onto grievance–and it’s like a poison that’s eating away at you and your emotional well being, and preventing true happiness in your long-term relationship.  So long as grievance and resentment are a regular part of your experience in...

105 The ESSENCE of what it takes to have a good–even amazing –marriage is not complex– it's actually very simple. So in this episode, I boil down EVERYTHING I teach my clients to do–and everything I have done to make my marriage the amazing loving thriving one it is– into the 3 things you must do to have the same. Just 3!  Because I want you to see how simple it really is.  That said, DOING t...

104   Being honest and authentic with your partner is important to intimacy–but being  transparent, authentic and open (TAO) with yourself is even more important if you want to  have a relationship you feel great in! I want this to be the year your marriage changes for the better forever . So let’s start it off on the right foot: with a TAO process that helps you take a clear-eyed look at yourself...