Highly Sensitive, Happily Married

119  If you have been listening to this podcast and seeing only small improvements  (or none at all ) in your relationship, today’s topic is likely the crucial missing piece for you. Sadly, this really important topic tends to be MISSING from the conversation about having the kind of relationship we sensitive women really want with our partners–to our marriage’s detriment! We need to talk about an...

118  If you want to avoid falling into a “rut” – or are already in one in your relationship–this episode is for you.   We dive into a short review of why ruts (what I call "disenchantment") happen, and how they are actually just a phase that can, with your help,  propel you into something better than ever in your marriage: What I call "Real-Enchantment". This is a more mature,...

In this special bonus episode, you’ll hear directly from the mouths of past Treasured participants and clients (normal highly sensitive women just like you) about what things were like before coaching with me and how things changed in their marriages by working with me. Listen in to these inspiring stories and hear their words of encouragement to you! I hope you’ll leave this episode feeling a lot...

So many highly sensitive women fall into a habit of Overcare (see episode 93 to learn all about it), and it leads to a lot of annoyance, resentment and negativity in their relationships. Some months ago, my client Luanne was no different.  Until she came to work with me. Then she shifted it all , and is now truly enjoying her now husband and her life so much more–and feeling more peaceful than eve...

This is a special short episode about the best way to evolve your marriage as a HSP.  In it, you get to hear directly from 3 of my recent highly sensitive Treasured program graduates, Emma, Sonya, and Rockie about the power of healing our relationships in a community of supportive like-minded others.  They share what their experience in the Treasured group was like, how they felt nervous about a g...

116  If you feel like the love you once had in your relationship has faded (a little or a lot), and dissatisfaction and disappointment have  moved in,  you are in a phase of relationship I call disenchantment. And truth be told, finding yourself here is more the rule than the exception in modern relationships. But it doesn't have to be. Today you'll hear the 3 reasons why disenchantment...

115  Attraction. One of the funnest, most vitalizing, magical parts of love relationships. If you are like most women, you WANT to keep it alive in your marriage–or bring it back if it's faded. And you want it to go both wa ys: you want to feel attracted to your partner–and feel their attraction to you, too. Unfortunately, it is very common for feelings of attraction to seemingly fade over ti...

114  Are you making excuses for your significant other? Or are you genuinely accepting them and meeting them with understanding? Find out in this episode. You’ve heard me say it a lot: it IS important to accept our partner for who they are. But, if  accepting them feels to you more like you're resigning yourself to things not feeling good between you, or you feel like you’re having to tolerat...

113    If you find yourself asking, “ Did I marry the wrong person ?”, wondering if maybe there is someone better out there for you, or noticing a lot of what is not so great about your partner—or generally feeling dissatisfied with your marriage— this episode is for you. This is so common as highly sensitive people, not just because our partner's faults tend to loom large to us, but  because...

112   Many highly sensitive people tend towards perfectionism. Although perfectionism can make us feel successful in certain ways, it actually fuels an exhausting, self-worth-depleting cycle that does more harm than good in our lives and relationships. Today we dive into the whats, whys and hows of it. We look at WHY we fall into perfectionism (hint–it’s a protective strategy developed early on in...

111  Anger is not a bad emotion. It can be a useful fuel for positive change in our relationships. But in our modern relationships, it most often isn't… That’s because we tend to over-indulge in it, and react out of it. So it ends up doing more harm than good in our marriages. If you find yourself annoyed, frustrated, resentful, or angry somewhat often at your partner–and you think you may sh...

110  If you don't feel as appreciated in your relationship as you want to, you are not alone. Lots of highly sensitive women have shared with me that they feel the same. I want to help you turn that around. Because there's SO much to appreciate in all that you do and all that you are. And I want you to FEEL that. So today I share 5 tips to start shifting the very culture of your marriage...

109  Does your partner try to “fix” you when you're sad, or quickly tell you that it will  all be okay, make a joke ( or even ignore you)–instead of holding you or sitting lovingly with you while you cry or spill it all out–like you want him to? This is so common! So, if you don’t feel very emotionally supported by your partner when you are having a hard day or are upset–or if you wish he was...

108   If you’re a classic highly sensitive woman, you love a good deep conversation. But you may find you have less of them than you want to with your significant other.  Today I will help you change that, so you can have more of that intimate connection –via conversation–that you love.  In this episode I share one simple– but powerful –key to engaging your partner in meaningful conversations more...

107  If you’ve ever experienced the wonky hormones of PMS or perimenopause, you know they can impact how you feel and act with your loved ones–especially your significant other.  And if you’re highly sensitive, the effect of these hormonal times can be extra hard. If, at certain times of month, you feel more irritable, snippy, and averse to your husband, if you tend to have more arguments, or feel...

106  Feel resentful towards your partner sometimes? Find it hard to let go of his small or large wrongdoings –or things he’s done in the past? If so, you’re holding onto grievance–and it’s like a poison that’s eating away at you and your emotional well being, and preventing true happiness in your long-term relationship.  So long as grievance and resentment are a regular part of your experience in...

105 The ESSENCE of what it takes to have a good–even amazing –marriage is not complex– it's actually very simple. So in this episode, I boil down EVERYTHING I teach my clients to do–and everything I have done to make my marriage the amazing loving thriving one it is– into the 3 things you must do to have the same. Just 3!  Because I want you to see how simple it really is.  That said, DOING t...

104   Being honest and authentic with your partner is important to intimacy–but being  transparent, authentic and open (TAO) with yourself is even more important if you want to  have a relationship you feel great in! I want this to be the year your marriage changes for the better forever . So let’s start it off on the right foot: with a TAO process that helps you take a clear-eyed look at yourself...

103  Ready to start the New Year off on the most love-empowering foot, for REAL positive change in your marriage?   The most powerful way to do that (actually the only way to do that) is by taking super-responsibility for all you can in your marriage–in particular the pain or unhappiness you are experiencing. Doesn’t sound like fun? I’ve heard that before from other sensitive people. And it’s the...

102   Ever felt that stinging (or punch-in-the-gut) feeling when your partner says or does something hurtful? Or maybe it’s something he doesn't do that leads to you feeling like he just doesn’t care. Like you don’t matter. Like you aren’t loved. For highly sensitive women, this is oh-so-common. It may very well be true that your partner could be more skillful in his interactions with you. At...

101  If you want more connection, love, and joy between you and your partner, but you're often disappointed, frustrated, resentful or irritated with your significant other, you're definitely going to want to listen to this episode. We are diving into what has been researched to be the #1 thing happy couples do to keep their marriage fulfilling, connected, and strong for life: Making regu...

It’s episode 100!!! And we are celebrating with a special conversation with my very own husband about what it takes for you, as a sensitive person, and your partner to have a marriage you LOVE for the long-haul . He and I dive into a few of our keys to keeping our marriage “real-enchanted” (fun, passionate, and loving despite being real–and flawed– humans living real, messy lives.) We cover: How w...

099  If you’re an HSP and your partner doesn't understand what High sensitivity is and how it impacts you and your relationship, it can make things between you harder. You’ve been listening and learning all about sensitivity and having a great marriage as a Highly Sensitive Person. But you still feel your partner doesn't understand you or your sensitivity sometimes. I made this episode t...

098  Your values are a huge factor in your marriage happiness and fulfillment.  Unfortunately, it's all too  easy to not be very conscious of what our values actually are, if the ones we live by currently are serving us, what we want our values to be, or if we ourselves are living out values that serve us well in our marriage (often, instead we can fall into noticing where our partner isn’t l...

097  Your wants and needs can be met in your relationship–even if they aren’t right now. Last episode we clarified the difference between want and a need– and it is required listening before diving into this one.  In this episode, we look more in depth at getting your WANTS met in your relationship (think of it as part 2 on fulfilling your wants and needs in your marriage). You’ll come away knowin...