Hello Hayes

This week on the Hello Hayes pod, I'm reflecting on my beliefs about Botox. Why haven’t I done it yet? Is it moral superiority or genuine disinterest? No final answers here, just honest questions and an eyebrow or two (literally) raised. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What do you do when something doesn’t sit right, but addressing it feels risky? In this episode of Hello Hayes, I’m answering three advice letters that circle around one big question: Should I speak up, or move on? We’re talking about backhanded compliments, financial secrets, flaky friendships, and the moment you start to wonder if you’re asking too much — or just finally seeing things clearly. I...

Is therapy making everyone selfish? A friend asked me this question the other day...and I have thoughts. So in this episode of the Hello Hayes podcast, I’m sharing my personal journey with therapy and tackling your biggest therapy questions — from knowing when therapy is working to dealing with therapists who overshare, and the fear of facing what you might find out about yourself. Let's dive in :...

in this episode, I’m sharing 12 lessons I learned at 31 that helped me get to a happier place — from rethinking success and letting my friends show up for me, to embracing fear and finding joy in the little moments. Whether you’re in your 20s, 30s, or just navigating life, I hope these lessons help you find happiness, too. 💛 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's the Hello Hayes Guide to Giving Good Advice! If you’ve ever struggled with knowing what to say when a friend asks for guidance (or felt frustrated when someone gave you bad advice), this episode is for you. As an advice columnist (Hello Hayes), I’ve spent years answering your letters and helping people navigate life’s toughest situations. In this episode, I’m breaking down how to actually hel...

[Originally published on YouTube.] Introducing, the Hello Hayes Six Besties Theory. This friendship theory has changed my life and I’m so excited to share it with you. In this explainer video, we’re diving deep into the six essential bestie archetypes: The North Star, The Seasonal, The Good Time, The OG, The Dead Body, and The Work Bestie. But this isn’t just a list! By the end of the video, you'l...

We all have feelings we wish we didn’t. Jealousy, resentment, comparison...the kind of emotions that make us feel a little gross, even though they’re totally human. In this advice column episode, I’m answering three Hello Hayes advice letters about: 💔 A former friend struggling to let go of resentment toward their ex-best friend’s success 🤰 A woman grieving a miscarriage while navigating her cou...

Can my significant other or sibling be my best friend? Do North Star besties have to be reciprocal? Is there any type of friend who I can expect to text every day? In this episode, I’m answering your most frequently asked questions about my Six Besties Theory! If you're not familiar with the theory, you can watch my Six Besties, Explained video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CY5v2LreUrU&t=1...

this week we're talking about sibling relationships, age gaps, and growing up with divorce. I recently posted about the 8.5 year age gap between me and my younger brother, and how, as a kid, I often felt like a third parent to both of my siblings (can't forget my sister, the sweet middle child!). i wrote that this dynamic has definitely impacted our sibling relationship today, as well as my own fe...

my loves, welcome back! after taking a much-needed podcasting break, I’m back with a reimagined vision for the Hello Hayes pod. in this episode, I share why I almost walked away for good and the lessons I learned about failure, growth, and change. plus, I answer an advice submission about finding direction in life when you feel like you’re starting from square one. whether you’re navigating your o...

See you next year, Hayeselnuts! Hello Hayes survey: https://forms.gle/Jtv2BKr2Wafy75gh6 In the meantime, connect with me on Substack, YouTube, and Instagram. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of Hello Hayes, we're talking about long distance friendship: how to make friends when you move somewhere new, but also, how to maintain the friendships that are now separated by miles and miles and miles. Hayes invites one of her North Star besties Matt onto the show to discuss. References: Dear Noah: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dfAzhnguXBc 00:00 Cold open 00:42 Topic intro: L...

[Watch on YouTube.] This week on Hello Hayes, we're talking about flaky friends. Hayes answers three advice submissions about a distant childhood friend, feeling disconnected from your single besties, and how to deal with someone who always cancels. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

(Watch on YouTube.) This week on Hello Hayes, I'm answering an advice letter....from myself. After experiencing what I call a "grief explosion" last week, I needed to give myself some advice. Thanks for being here while I talk it out with you. Crying is OK. Grieving is OK. Trying new things is OK. Planning to protect yourself...is OK!!! Please let me know what you thought of this episode. If it go...

Content warning: Letter 2 includes a brief reference to SA, no details. It’s not the focus of the letter, but I do bring up the context of being a survivor. If this makes you uncomfortable, see the timestamps below to skip. This week on Hello Hayes, Hayes answers three advice submissions about how to balance two people's physical needs in a romantic relationship, advocating for our needs and fanta...

[Watch on YouTube.] In this episode, Hayes answers three letters from women who feel like they (and their feelings, boundaries, and bodies) are too much. We explore the question: is it selfish...or is it self-worth? Letter one features a man who insists on being besties with his exes. Letter two, from someone whose boyfriend told her he's losing attraction towards her because of her weight gain. (...

In this episode, Hayes is joined by recipe developer, food creator, and soon to be debut cookbook author Justine Doiron, aka Justine Snacks. For the first time on the show, Justine brings her own Hello Hayes letter to discuss with Hayes, focused on some of the pressures she feels around the success and promotion for her cookbook Justine Cooks. We also talk about dealing with imposter syndrome in o...

Hello! In today's episode, which is an audio exclusive, I'm reading three columns from the Hello Hayes archive...a read aloud, if you will! These pieces can all be read in their original form on my Substack, hellohayes.substack.com. This is where my writing lives and where you can support Hello Hayes financially, if you're able. Paid subscribers get a priority pass on submissions! Learn more about...

In today’s episode we’re talking about something that has one of the biggest impacts on our mental well-being, whether we’re happy or distressed….and that’s our living situations. Thinking back on my own life, some of the most tumultuous times for me were exacerbated by the fact that I was living in places I didn’t feel comfortable in. Whether it was living in my sorority, or trying to figure out...

In honor of our anniversary, Brob joins the pod to talk about 10 lessons we've learned over 10 years together. He's a little camera shy but I think he did great :) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

(Watch this episode on YouTube.) Today’s episode is all about the thrilling yet sometimes messy and confusing world of crushes. We’ve got three letters: "I have a pattern of falling for people who are unavailable. Should I tell my new friend that I have a crush on her, even though she's in a longterm relationship?" "I told my coworker I had feelings for him. I think he has feelings for me too but....

What do you do when you're invited to an event with a plus one...but you have no one to bring? Is it better to go alone or to bring a friend? On this week’s episode of the Hello Hayes podcast we’re chatting going to events solo, finding confidence in yourself, and doing the hard thing because you can. I also share the story of how I embarrassed myself in front of my work hero a couple of weeks ago...

Watch on YouTube. (9am EST) 0:00 - Introduction 1:04 - Overview of the 3 letters 1:46 - Letter 1: Estranged from family 3:50 - Response to letter 1 begins  5:02 - Why certain phrases trigger us 7:12 - What I’ve noticed making an internet advice column 9:37 - Ideas for the future 12:03 - Why it doesn’t feel sustainable to bite your tongue 16:05 - Being honest about your reaction 17:33 - Letter 2: D...

Watch on YouTube. 1:11 - Letter 1: “My friends are slut shaming me” 4:42 - Don’t call it a “hoe phase” 8:47 - Apologizing when you didn’t do anything wrong 10:37 - Should a man be ready to marry you after 1 year? 15:16- The 4 questions to ask before confronting someone 17:00 - Letter 2: “My sister makes me feel bad about my body” 19:00 - Sibling dynamics 20:32 - Pick your battles 22:24 - The pros/...

Watch this episode on YouTube. What do you do when your best friend's live in a different city than you and are always posting about how close they are? What about if most of your bridesmaids don't post pictures from your wedding, even though you posted pictures from theirs? How do you talk to a friend (who is also an influencer) who's always posting stuff on social media when you're together? In...