Habits for Your Happily Ever After: Relationship Communication Advice

How do you know when it's time to divorce? We all face relationship struggles. What’s the difference between struggles that will make your relationship stronger, and struggles that signal it’s time to divorce? My guest, Kate, talks about how long she considered leaving her marriage. She was concerned about the impact on her three sons. She wanted to make certain she’d tried everything in case the...

Is your relationship an "opposites attract" sort of thing? Today is my first interview on this podcast, and I'm thrilled to welcome Shannon Markland to talk about the yin and yang in her relationship. In this episode you'll hear: The story of how Shannon met her husband, Patrick, and how that first meeting set a template for their relationship How Chinese Medicine has practical applications in the...

When you ask your spouse a question, do you get one-word replies instead of a conversation? Today we’re talking about the role of friendship in your relationship and what happens when the friend doesn’t show up. Today I’ll introduce you to The Ghost who haunts your relationship You’ll understand why the Ghost makes it difficult to connect with your spouse And you’ll get some strategies to strength...

Is your spouse controlling or judgmental? Does your spouse keep score in your relationship? I’m Rebecca Mullen, a relationship coach living in Western Colorado. Today I’ll introduce you to The Saboteur: the shadow side of The Partner You’ll understand why the Saboteur is controlling and critical And you’ll get a magic question that tames The Saboteur so it doesn’t take over your relationship. Reme...

Vulnerability can leave you lonely even in a marriage relationship. Have you ever had a fabulous relationship exchange with your spouse, and then, an hour or a day later, you feel emptier, or lonelier than ever before? Today we’ll return to my marriage framework of Partner, Lover, and Friend. We’ll discuss What it means to consummate your marriage (hint: it’s not what you think). And you’ll get a...

How often do you say "thank you" to your partner? Today we explore the 4 magical ways two simple words will vastly improve your happily ever after: 1.    You’ll discover how thank you can be a door of permission for you to create the life of your dreams 2.    We’ll explore why thank you is often preferable to the word sorry 3.    And you’...

A workshop to help you avoid conflict when it comes to shared work or chores You share work in your relationship: cleaning the toilet and meal-prep. How can you share chores with more happiness and less conflict? We’ll identify 5 conversations you can have to create clarity between you and your spouse when it comes to chores. I’ll give you some sample scripts you can use. And I’ll give you the two...

What is better than the twitterpation feeling of dating? In this episode we'll discuss the invisible power of happily ever after and why comfort is so crucial to the longevity of your relationship. We’ll talk about why comfort is invisible until there’s a crisis What you can do to make comfort less invisible And I’ll give you a discussion prompt to help you clarify what makes your relationship mor...

Want to get your batch of date nights onto the calendar and into your memory bank? In this bonus episode, you can stop and start the podcast with your spouse. You'll be led through prompts to create unique dates for your Partner, Friend, and Lover. Want to see the show notes? Click here . Want to read a transcript? Click here .

Is it hard for you to think of creative dates? In today's episode you'll hear how I magically invited my husband to my favorite kind of date night, and why HE SUGGESTED the same kind of date later on. The way you invite to a date night is critical Today you'll learn the magic of the invitation to your date nights so you and your sweetheart have fun things to do that nourish your relationship. We’l...

Today we’ll talk about the toxic impact that a layer of shame has on your relationship and the intimacy you crave. 1.    We’ll look at the emotions that cause shame 2.    You’ll identify three culprits that are likely to breed shame, and thus hinder open, honest conversation 3.    And I’ll give you a habit and a discussion to wash shame o...

Today we’ll examine the secret power of listening. 1.    You’ll hear a story about how a sweaty stranger ended years of conflict in my marriage 2.    Why it’s the Friend in your relationship that has magical powers to negotiate between the Lover and the Partner 3.    And I’ll give you a habit that turns fear and embarrassment into a magic...

Today we’ll discover how a simple question like “What’s for dinner?” is hiding dreams for your relationship and causing conflict. 1.    What hidden dreams does your adventurous Lover hare? 2.   How do those dreams cause conflict for the Partnership element of your relationship? 3.   We’ll compare the Partner and the Lover inside your relationship a...

I'm Rebecca Mullen, a relationship coach living in Western Colorado. Today we’ll look at why you might feel taken for granted in your relationship: 1.    You’ll hear why cleaning the kitchen is sexy 2.    You’ll get a gold-star habit that will shine a spotlight on the invisible work you do 3.    And I’ll give you a discussion prompt that...

Are you a leech in bed? Today we’ll talk about how to practice RECEIVING what you want instead of TAKING. 1.    We’ll examine the link between wanting and receiving 2.    You’ll discover why you don’t want to be a leech in bed 3.    And you’ll get a habit to help you RECEIVE pleasure so you don’t have to be grabby and TAKE the pleasure th...

In episode we’ll talk about how to own the pleasure you want to feel. 1.    We’ll talk about why it’s critical to your relationship that you become responsible for your own orgasm. 2.    You’ll get two habits to practice to help you identify what brings you pleasure 3.    And I’ll offer you a quick-paced date night discussion that will ma...

In this episode we’ll uncover the pattern you and your sweetheart have when there’s conflict. 1.    We’ll look at how everyone has a typical rhythm to their misunderstandings 2.   You'll get a habit to help slow the spin of an argument that gets out of control 3.    And you'll get a date night discussion that will help you recognize what upset...

Who do you treat the worst when you've had a bad day? If you're like most people the person you love the most gets the worst of your bad mood. In this episode: We'll discuss why the shrapnel of relationship stress is romantic. You'll get a date night discussion prompt to remind you how your partner comforts you. And you'll get a habit that will lessen stress-shrapnel in your relationship.

In this episode we talk about why the way you say hello and goodbye to your sweetheart matters. You’ll get a hello and goodbye habit to practice. I’ll give you a date night discussion prompt that will make you feel welcomed by your sweetheart. And I’ll offer you a colorful present to make a game out of Hi & Goodbye. Visit my website: RebeccaMullenCoaching.com Text me @ 970-210-4480 and te...

In a long relationship, How do you keep WANTING each other? In this episode you’ll discover a way to keep your sex life thriving You’ll hear a story about a romance that was dead and was resuscitated You’ll get an adventurous habit And I’ll give you a date night discussion topic so you and your lover can explore ways to tend the fire between you. You’ll hear a story about dance class and why getti...

If you and your spouse only talk about the details of life, you're killing the friendship in your relationship. Is there time to just hang out in your relationship? Or are you always busy? In this episode we'll discuss the role of friend in your relationship: We’ll talk about why companionship builds trust between you and your sweetheart And I’ll give you a date night discussion prompt to make it...

Overview In this episode I introduce my relationship framework: Partner, Friend & Lover. 1.    We’ll talk about how you and your sweetheart can be strong teammates. 2.    And I’ll give you a date night discussion prompt that helps you notice how you and your partner help each other.   You want to feel like you have a teammate in your relationship. Y...

In this show we’ll discuss How you might be shoving in your relationship without realizing it You'll get a date night discussion prompt about what makes a good invitation How often do you use the word “should” in your relationship? Using the word “should” is a protective move. You’re trying to protect how vulnerable you feel. But your spouse experiences the word “should” as a shove, rather than as...

In this episode: You’ll hear a story about earned love vs love that’s freely given and why keeping score in your marriage also keeps love out of reach. You’ll get a laughter challenge And I’ll introduce a new segment–Communication Breakdowns/Breakthroughs–and ask for your participation. How do you keep score in your relationship? Do you give yourself a tally mark when you clean the kitchen? Do you...

Resistance is a joy thief. We resist what we don’t want. Things like doing the dirty dishes or a spouse who doesn’t initiate sex. One of the best strategies for resisting these things is blame. When you blame your spouse for the dishes or the lack of sex in your relationship you feel righteous. But you have no joy. I’ll give you a controversial strategy for why you shouldn’t rush yourself to stop...