Good Grief

When a declining parent needs help, it creates a delicate balance of care and acceptance. Marsha Gray Hill thought she had found that balance, even as her mother began to show signs of dementia. But then, COVID ripped the rug out from under her, making it impossible to support her mother as she would have liked. In the end, the pandemic was what ended her mother's life. In the process, Marsha lear...

Darnell Lamont Walker makes it his life's mission to seed joy everywhere he is. How do his callings intersect? He is a children's television writer, a death doula, a filmmaker. In every case he hopes to inform, encourage and uplift his audience. In the end, all he does is about supporting everyone he encounters to heal, to make room for joy and to love ourselves. Join us as we talk about how he se...

The cause of anxiety and pain in our bodies can't be reduced to any one explanation. But in Jen Soriano's book, Nervous, she follows the threads of her own struggles to the personal, familial, cultural and intergenerational threads of her own physical pain and anxiety. Scientists are now recognizing that the traumas of our ancestors live on in us and can be felt for generations. How do we heal our...

Once, we were all children, incapable of protecting ourselves from the adults around us. If they were cruel and abusive, it laid tracks in us that made it hard to love and be loved, to see our own beauty and to become who we were meant to be. Wen Peetes knows this experience deeply, because it it her own. Recognizing what she needed to heal and speaking honestly about what has helped her find her...

Audrey is a fictional character who resembles her author, Gail Marlene Schwartz. They both suffer from anxiety. They have both lost friends to suicide when they were young. And they are both queer women constructing the families they dream of, with the nuanced questions that implies. In writing the book, what did Gail rely on from her own experience? Did writing it contribute to a better understan...

Glenn Hileman's parents lived a love story for the ages. Their story ended together when the East Troublesome fire in Colorado took their lives and the home they had built and loved together. Their son, Glenn, needed action to go forward with his grief. He mobilized the community to begin rebuilding and wrote a book telling their story. Although true, their lives feel almost like a novel! Sometime...

Through his experience coming to terms with the death of both his parents by murder when he was just fourteen, Scott Stabile grew to commit to a life led by love. His commitment extended not just to forgiveness and compassion for those who perpetrate acts of violence violence or damage, but even more primarily to himself. As a strong advocate for self acceptance and love, he works tirelessly to en...

When J.J. Duncan's son died of cancer at the age of eleven, she fell into a deep grief she was unable to find her way out of. But as an executive producer and story teller, she jumped at the chance to work on The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning, a series exploring the wonder of the Swedish custom. Unlike her own experience, the Swedish cast members were able to walk towards death unflinchingl...

Adoption is a loss that often lives in the shadows, both in the world and inside of adoptees. Losing everything you've ever known before there are even words to name it, when you are an absorbent, unformed human being can take a lifetime to understand. But it is only by recognizing the loss that adoptees can claim their birthright; a life of beauty and meaning. Michelle Madrid knows this territory...

Facing illness at a young age unravels every plan you had. When Jennifer Cramer-Miller was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease at 22, she had to rethink what life would look like. Through kidney transplants, dialysis and a never-ending need for medical care, Jennifer slowly learned to find the joy anyway. Refusing the be defined by illness, she nonetheless became an advocate for many other people...

Through her own losses and those of the patients she worked with as a palliative care doctor, Karen Wyatt learned the value of telling our stories. Writing became a meaningful and compelling practice for healing and now, she offers what she learned in her latest book, Stories From the Dark Night. she offers practical guidance to write about grief born of decades of experience with death, grief and...

After the death of her husband left her a young widow, Elaine Roth had no idea how she would make a new life for herself and her children. What would their lives look like now? She struggled to take care of herself, which led to a career as a Pilates instructor. And she struggled to envision love in her life, which led her to write a novel, The Midnight Garden. Her heroine's name, Hope, embodied t...

How does an Arab-American girl, moving across the middle east as her father follows his career, find her identity? And how is that search impacted when personal tragedy rocks her family? Kathryn Abdul-Baki started her life in the United States but then lived in Iran, Jerusalem, Kuwait, aware that her mother was different from the Arab mothers and that she, too, was different. Her relationships wit...

When Kevin Campbell's beloved diead after 22 years together, he couldn't bring himself to create music from the experience. It felt too painful to express his grief, even in his comfort zone; music. But over time he realized that in order to move forward he needed to express through his art the aspects of his feelings after the loss. Stages, his latest album, is the result. Capturing all the feeli...

Kenya Aissa has had many careers that all have one thing in common; healing in the context of trauma. A thirty year career as a social worker in the child welfare system deepened her awareness of how responding to our traumas informs our lives going forward. She has since integrated her yoga and wellness practices into her healing work. Her book Sacred Girl: Spiritual Life Skills for Conscious You...

The Last Love Note tells the fictional story of a young widow trying to find a way to move forward. Its heroine, Kate, has continued to parent, work, and keep her sense of humor but has had very little time to give her grief the space it needs. How many others in these modern times are in the same situation? The author, Emma Grey, knows first hand what happens when loss drops into your life and no...

During the COVID pandemic Becky Wilkes moved her parents in with her rather than tolerate being unable to see them. In the final stages of their life together, she had the opportunity to witness first hand the love that had sustained them and how it showed itself until death, and after. Her photographic essay captured in poignant detail their physical decline and their love. It opened a door to th...

What holds us back? How do past unresolved traumas, small and large, continue to control our lives and responses? Melanie Smith set out to discover for herself what was holding HER back. In the process, she learned invaluable lessons about how to loosen the hold her past had on her. Freeing herself from a life that didn't fit her, she found a joy beyond her imagining. And now, she uses teh princip...

When dementia comes for someone we love, how do we maintain connection and relationship? For Suzanne Finnamore it takes accepting that her mother, in her final stage of dementia, lives in another country; Suzanne has needed to learn the customs and accept the differences. When she can accept, there is room for magic, including the magic of living as if there is no death; where everyone we ever lov...

Finding herself still restless after the death of her husband, Judy Reeves sold everything and set out on a one year voyage around the world. Only a few of her destinations were planned and most of them could be cancelled at a moment's notice. Thus unfolded an experience of discovery; who was she now, a single woman, a widow? What would the next phase of her life look like? In the solitude of her...

What is it that helps us discover ourselves? It is often the challenges, the losses and deep pains, that over time lead us to claim our own natures. For Roberta Kuriloff, a crushing breakup led her to do what she had wanted for a long time; build her own home and live in the Maine woods. Along the way, she explored the turning points of her life, including the death of her mother when she was six...

A diagnosis of MS affects more than just the person now struggling with life, unable to continuing living as they did. When Suzanne Marriott's husband was diagnosed, they faced a re-ordering of everything in their life together. Unable to work, walk well or count on his emotional stability, Suzanne found herself managing more and more of the business of their life together. Through, psychological...

Susan Hayden experienced three sudden losses that shaped her life; her childhood best friend, her father and her husband. How did she shape these losses into the creative voice she crafted over a lifetime? How did they change her? Going forward from loss, what do we take with us and what do we leave behind? Her first published memoir, Now You Are a Missing Person, makes poetry of loss, showing us...

Theo Boyd's idyllic farm upbringing led to a life she thought was perfect until a terrible accident killed her mother. In the space of a few years, her father also died traumatically and her marriage ended. What helped her to navigate these unexpected and crushing losses? Where did she end up after it all? And what kinds of advice does she have for others facing the worst sorts of losses?

The novelist Lynn Hightower approached her grief in a familiar way- through story. Her heroine has lost everything. And that is what makes her dangerous! Heroine Junie Lagarde's husband has died in a tragic plane wreck and her dog is missing. Wrapped in mystery, she will stop at nothing to know what happened and to do all she can to find her beloved dog. Those of us who have grieved deeply will re...