Get Your Marriage On! with Dan Purcell

Have you ever been intimate with your spouse, but instead of enjoying the moment, you're stuck in your head? Wondering if they're enjoying it, worrying about your performance, or feeling pressure to make everything go just right? What if all that effort to make intimacy better is actually making it worse? In this episode, Dan shares a surprisingly vulnerable story from his own marriage about how h...

Has sex started to feel more like a responsibility than something you actually look forward to? Somewhere along the way, many couples stop playing together. Sex becomes serious, intimacy feels like work, and differences in desire create pressure instead of connection. In this episode, Dan sits down with returning guest and relationship coach Tammy Camp to talk about building an adult playground in...

Do Christians really have worse sex lives—or is that just a story we've been told? After seeing conflicting claims online, Dan went straight to the data. What he found was surprising: churchgoing couples are having slightly more sex than those who rarely attend religious services—but both groups are having significantly less sex than couples did a generation ago. So what's really going on? In this...

What if your sex life is good—but you still sense there could be something more? Sex therapist Dr. Emily Jamea kept hearing this question from couples who had overcome their sexual struggles but still longed for the passion and intensity they once felt. Her search for answers led her to study sexual flow —the experience of becoming so immersed in intimacy that distractions disappear and time seems...

Has sex in your marriage become a yes-or-no question: "Are we having sex tonight?" For one spouse, that question may bring hope and anticipation. For the other, it may feel like a test they're about to pass or fail. When every flirtation, touch, or attempt at closeness seems tied to one expected outcome, both spouses may eventually stop reaching for each other. In this episode, Dan shares how this...

Does sex in your marriage ever feel like a race toward intercourse or orgasm? Dr. Lisa Elieson calls this "baseball sex"—rushing around the bases instead of enjoying where you are. In this episode, she joins Dan to explore sexuality as a creative art: something two people build together, moment by moment, without knowing exactly where it has to lead. You'll learn how slowing down, letting go of a...

The more you pursue your spouse for emotional or sexual connection, the more they seem to pull away—and the harder you try, the worse it gets. Certified sex therapist Dr. Laurie Watson explains why couples get trapped in this pursue-withdraw cycle and how vulnerable, blame-free conversations can begin to change it. We also discuss why trading emotional connection for sex backfires, what women's bo...

Why does one spouse keep reaching for more sexually while the other feels responsible for keeping things safe? Dr. Roy Myers, author of Playful Practice , shares what his research with long-term couples revealed about this common dynamic. We explore the relationship between faith and sensuality, why many couples don't actually have a communication problem, and what Roy means when he tells couples...

If your marriage feels more like a roommate arrangement than a romantic relationship, the problem may not be that you've grown too far apart. It may be that you've become too merged, too careful, and too afraid to disagree. In this episode, Dan explains how avoiding differences to keep the peace slowly drains honesty, intimacy, and desire from a marriage. You'll learn how to recognize the pattern...

Welcome to Marriage Undressed—a live Q&A where Dan Purcell and marriage coach Tammy Camp answer real, anonymous questions about sex, intimacy, and marriage. In this bonus episode, they discuss what to do when one spouse wants more adventure in the bedroom, how to express a desire without creating pressure, and how to handle differences in physical affection without constantly feeling rejected. The...

Why does libido feel effortless during the honeymoon phase—and then seem to disappear? After experiencing this pattern in her own relationships, Hannah Johnson, known as The Libido Fairy , set out to understand what allows desire to grow in a long-term relationship. In this episode, she shares practical ways couples can make intimacy more pleasurable, collaborative, and genuinely connecting. You'l...

Is masturbation okay in a Christian marriage? It's a common question, but one many couples are afraid to ask—and few people answer directly. In this episode, Dan offers two practical tests to help you and your spouse decide what is right for your marriage. He also explores the difference between masturbation, lust, and fantasy; potential benefits for intimacy and body awareness; and how to navigat...

When one spouse wants sex more than the other, both partners can end up feeling hurt—the higher-desire spouse feels rejected, while the lower-desire spouse feels pressured or inadequate. In this episode, sex therapist Dr. Jennifer Litner explains what actually helps couples navigate desire differences. We discuss resentment and emotional repair, duty sex, hormonal and lifestyle factors, the pressu...

For years, I asked my wife to initiate sex more often because I wanted to feel chosen and desired. Instead, my requests created pressure, scorekeeping, and a cycle that made genuine desire even harder. In this episode, I explain why I stopped asking, what I misunderstood about responsive desire, and how shifting from initiating sex to initiating connection transformed our intimate relationship. We...

When work, kids, meals, schedules, and the never-ending mental checklist take everything you have, intimacy can start to feel like one more task. Amy Nesbit knows that tension firsthand. After nearly 20 years as a working professional—including time at Apple—she has learned how making the invisible load visible, asking for help before resentment builds, and protecting the parts of herself that bri...

Most couples think they know what's hurting their marriage. Poor communication. Different sex drives. Parenting disagreements. Financial stress. Growing apart. That's exactly what one couple thought, too. After 18 years of marriage, they came to Dan convinced they knew what needed fixing. But as they peeled back the layers, they uncovered a deeper problem—one neither of them had recognized—and tha...

Shame thrives in secrecy—but healing doesn't. In this deeply honest conversation, Dan sits down with Craig Perra, a former attorney whose secret life of pornography, strip clubs, prostitution, and compulsive sexual behavior nearly destroyed everything he cared about. After years of trying therapy, recovery groups, and identifying himself as a "sex addict," Craig reached a breaking point. What happ...

What does the Constitutional Convention have to do with your marriage? More than you might think. As we celebrate Independence Day, Dan explores one of the greatest acts of collaboration in history—the creation of the U.S. Constitution—and uncovers surprising lessons for couples navigating differences in intimacy, communication, and connection. The delegates in Philadelphia didn't create unity by...

What if the key to better orgasms, less pain during sex, and greater confidence in intimacy isn't in your head—it's in your pelvic floor? In this episode, Dan sits down with pelvic floor physical therapist Kristin Damery to discuss the often-overlooked foundation of sexual wellness. Kristin explains how pelvic floor health affects arousal, orgasm, pain during intercourse, blood flow, muscle functi...

What happens when you realize your spouse still loves you—but doesn't really like you? After 20 years of marriage, that's the realization Matt Sallas faced. In this episode, Matt shares how addiction, obligation-based sex, and emotional disconnection nearly destroyed his marriage—and the framework that helped rebuild trust, attraction, and intimacy. We discuss emotional safety, emotional masculini...

Has your sex life become a little too predictable? In this episode, Dan shares 7 simple principles to help couples break out of routine, deepen connection, and bring more fun, playfulness, and excitement into their intimate relationship. From creating an intimacy menu to exploring new experiences together, you'll learn practical ways to stop having boring sex and start creating more meaningful con...

Most people think being a good spouse means being selfless, accommodating, and easygoing. But what if those same habits are quietly creating resentment, frustration, and disconnection? In this episode, we're joined by Stu Murray , a men's leadership coach, to discuss the "Nice Guy Pattern"—the tendency to suppress your own needs, avoid conflict, and hope your partner will magically figure out what...

Differences in sexual desire can feel deeply personal. One spouse feels rejected. The other feels pressured. And both end up wondering if something is wrong with their marriage. In this episode, Dan shares three principles that can completely change the way you think about desire differences in marriage. He talks honestly about the hidden power dynamics couples fall into, why conflict around sex i...

Better sex isn't just about what happens in the bedroom. In this episode, Dan sits down with Zach Watson to unpack the hidden emotional and mental work happening inside many marriages — and why it has such a powerful impact on intimacy. They talk about invisible labor, mental load, emotional safety, and the loneliness that can build when one partner feels like they're carrying everything alone. Za...

In this final session with Peggy and Steve, things feel different.  The wall Peggy used to feel during intimacy—the fear, tension, and resistance that would suddenly shut everything down—is starting to soften. And for the first time in a long time, both of them are beginning to relax. In this episode, you'll hear Peggy and Steve reflect on the progress they've made over the last few months, what s...