Football Ramble

Jim Campbell is happy with a point at Anfield. However, he’s not so happy with Zinchenko attempting to do the Stanky Legg when faced up against Mohamed Salah in the box. He and Luke tuck into the festive feast served up by Liverpool and Arsenal, before enjoying Robbie Fowler sticking the boot into Michael Owen for dessert. Plus, Jim admits he would move in with Peter Drury for the rest of the year...

Our listener Christian has a theory: could a European Super League actually improve English football? Marcus, Luke and Andy debate the merits of that suggestion on today’s Mailbag. Elsewhere, Luke explains why someone should make a biopic all about Paolo Maldini’s tennis career and there's agreement that humiliation is the key to improving players' conduct in football! Follow us on  Twitter ,...

What reason would Roy Hodgson have to incubate Pep Guardiola? I don’t know. It’s cold outside, but Marcus, Luke, Andy and Jim are here to warm your footballing hearts with tales of Hodgson looking after his owl eggs, Ross County’s manager having a full-blown rant about the standard of Scottish football, and Gary O’Neil almost certainly getting a contentious penalty decision against him and his tea...

Marcus needs consoling. Again. That’s because Fulham have been drawn against Liverpool in a two-legged semi-final. Oh no... Luke joins Marcus to react to Liverpool dishing out yet another defeat to poor old David Moyes, who made history by becoming the first manager to try and play a Carabao Cup quarter-final via email. Plus, why Santa has been dragged into the middle of the Celtic-Rangers rivalry...

The Carabao’s back! Today, Jim and Andy have to console Marcus after Kieran Trippier - aka one of Gareth Southgate's brave boys - suffered a difficult night at Stamford Bridge. At least Fulham won! Speaking of Southgate, Marcus touts Steve Cooper as the next England manager now that he’s been sacked by Nottingham Forest. Plus, we hear from a cockney parrot and learn about some West Ham fans that c...

The sound of laughter, the sun appearing while you’re out for a walk, scoring a late penalty to draw 2-2 at the Etihad, these are just a few of the things guaranteed to bring a friendly smile out of Roy Hodgson. Today, Marcus, Luke, Jim and Vish take a moment to enjoy that before settling into their seats to watch the next chapter of the Martínez Cinematic Universe. Surely, Neal Maupay is the stor...

“Football was better in the good old days!” But was it really? Today, Marcus, Luke and Vish state the case for why football is actually better off with fewer Vinnie Jones type characters. I am sure Gazza agrees… Marcus then plays the hits by reminiscing about the time a 35-year-old Gabriel Batistuta nearly signed for Fulham and shoehorning everyone's (no-one's) favourite British-Canadian tennis pl...

Join us for a bumper Barclays preview! Marcus, Luke, Jim and Vish settle in to write some Tom Cairney fan fiction and wonder if Steve McClaren will tear his hair island out should Man United get  punished  by Jürgen n’ co. Elsewhere, Stevey Cooper looks to save his skin Under The Lights™ and Chelsea vote to ban something they’ve been doing all season - very noble. Follow us on  Twit...

After Newcastle’s chaotic loss against Milan, Pete comes down from off the ceiling to commiserate Andy, who saw his dreams of some paid Europa League work at St James’ go up in smoke. Commiserations are also extended to fans of the Premier League’s UEFA coefficient and we catch up with results elsewhere, as the Champions League group stages rage against the dying of the light. Follow us on  T...

Is Man United’s season over? Marcus, Jim and Vish debate that on today’s Ramble after their Champions League exit has left Vish yearning for the haunted boy himself, Ole Gunnar Solskjær. Things must be really bad… Elsewhere, Jim explains why perhaps Arteta didn’t play the kids in their “big rubber” against PSV last night and we wonder whether Sevilla have a Europa League Black Card that will guara...

We see you, sitting there with that apple core in your hand, about to listen to this podcast. See that bin over there? Go for it. Be brave. Be like Michael Owen. Marcus, Luke and Andy react to one of the weirdest things anyone has ever said this year, while Man United revert to their painful norm. Plus, Andy explains how Aston Villa went full-blown Emery on Arsenal, Marcus inspires Fulham to score...

After a week where you could watch every Premier League game live, do we actually have... access to too much football? Today, Marcus, Luke, Andy and Pete are back for our (now weekly) Ramble Mailbag! On the show, the Ramblers are given the power to overturn one result from football history and Luke, nobly, decides to use his powers for good to overturn one of football’s great injustices. There's a...

We want to talk about the football. Marcus wants to talk about the fact that he watched Fulham on Wednesday with Stuart Broad and then convinced Roberto Martinez to take the England job at the urinals. Well, we’ve had one England manager resign from a toilet so why not… Marcus, Andy, Luke and Pete discuss Steve Cooper’s last chance saloon at Wolves and a huge showdown at Villa Park! Pete also pond...

Unlike Trent Alexander-Arnold, Pete and Andy keep their bums very much covered on tonight’s Ramble Reacts! But there’s no hiding Pete’s secret… They discuss a hugely important win for Man United, Aston Villa’s masterclass to beat Man City, and why Evangelos Marinakis’s Craven Cottage ticket ended up in a hedge – and why ol’ Roy the Boy could be thrown in one soon, too! Follow us on Twitter , Insta...

Arsenal went to Kenilworth Road and stole the points! Just like Aaron Ramsdale’s dad stole Arsenal’s Christmas decorations... After a brilliant game of football Marcus, Jim, Vish and Andy are here to explain why chaos is the answer for Luton Town going forward. They then all agree that chaos is definitely NOT the answer for Man United ahead of a potentially season-defining clash with Chelsea tonig...

Just another normal weekend. And you haven’t even heard about Pete breaking up a fight between two horses yet.  Marcus, Luke, Pete and Vish are here to unpack the madness that was Man City vs Spurs, the madness that was Liverpool vs Fulham, and the madness of Old Trafford’s chicken prep. Plus, we pay our respects to Paul Heckingbottom waking up to find out he’s ‘going to be’ sacked later toda...

Is there a feeling in England that supporters of English clubs from other countries “aren’t true fans”? What Premier League rule change would you like to implement? What’s the best stadium atmosphere you have experienced live? Marcus, Luke, Jim and Vish are back answering your questions on today’s Mailbag, feat. some wonderfully heartwarming stories about how Premier League fan culture is thriving...

December is upon us! And what can be more festive than a snowball fight between Aberdeen fans and Helsinki’s goalkeeper in the Europa Conference League? Luke is back in the studio and joins Marcus, Vish and Jim to hear an update from Head Foreman Steve McManaman on the Anfield stadium extension, ponder on just how many Newcastle United players Erik Ten Hag will embrace after defeat this weekend, a...

Welcome to hell? Lads, I’ve already been in it. Those were the thoughts of a philosophical Vithushan Ehantharajah on tonight’s Ramble Reacts after Manchester United failed to beat the Hall of Fame of Your Favourite Players You Don’t Really Pay Attention To. Vish and Marcus reflect on a dramatic and chaotic Champions League night in Istanbul, mainly thanks to the slippery hands of one man: André On...

Newcastle were on the end of a stinking decision last night. Predictably, Pete seems the least outraged by the whole incident - but Marcus and Vish are angry about it, particularly because it robbed Nick Pope of his clean sheet bonus. Maybe not quite as angry as the Newcastle fan that had to turn on his Christmas lights to cheer himself up, mind... Elsewhere, we ask if Man City fans would be happi...

We witnessed one of the greatest ever Premier League goals on Sunday, but there are more urgent matters to attend to on today’s show. Like… is Sean Dyche actually bald? Marcus, Vish, Jim and Pete guide you through a chaotic Premier League weekend! We argue that Lewis Miley looks like a stretched out Furby, Steve Bull should be given an unlimited number of dogs by Wolverhampton City Council, and wh...

We’re finally back in the warm, comforting arms of our benign Premier League overlords. And do you know what that means? Protest planes. Pete, Vish, Andy and Jim discuss how Everton fans should make their protest heard, what it would be like to have your head in Jurgen Klopp’s armpit, and unconfirmed reports that Erling Haaland has a Viking longboat on its way to Liverpool full of special super fi...

Been wondering what you’re missing out on over on the Football Ramble Patreon? Well, here’s a taste… Every single Wednesday, we serve up our Friends of the Ramble with ‘Ramble Uncut’ – an extended edition of the show where we let you in behind the curtain for our unfiltered ramblings about football, life, and Alan Pardew’s presumably sickening taste in interior design. Today, you’ll hear some of o...

Is İlkay Gündoğan turning into the German Roy Keane? Can anyone stop Jim from turning into the God of Football? And will Kevin Keegan EVER stop hosting industry conferences? A listener has a fresh update for us... Marcus, Jim, Andy and Vish are here to look back on the final round of Euro 2024 qualifiers, where Wales fell short of automatic qualification and now face the play-offs. We wonder wheth...

England completed a statement 8-1 aggregate victory over North Macedonia. Marcus and Jim are on hand to send that message to the rest of Europe. They also remind us that there are no rebounds in a penalty shootout. Once that’s out of the way, the lads discuss if these two poor performances will have any effect on England going forward and whether Rico Lewis can make the squad for the Euros. Plus,...