Flying Free

Kathryn loved God and tried everything she could to be a good Christian wife. But no matter what she did, her husband made sure she believed she was the poison in the relationship. Here is an excerpt: "For me, I was constantly begging, “Give me the grace. Make me better. Help me to be pleasing to my husband. Help me to be a light to my family, to be something that brings life.”  You kind of feel l...

Rachel, Becky, and Natalie answer two listener questions: 1. “After successfully escaping abuse, how do you determine that the respect or positive treatment that you receive from any new relationships are not just another wave of wolves in sheep’s clothing, waiting for their opportunity to show their teeth? It doesn’t feel fair or trusting to look at every person that comes through your new life n...

What does it take to get free of a destructive relationship? Here are five new ways for Christian wives to think about their destructive marriage as well as all the other relationships they have that are unhealthy. I want to help you rewire your brain and transform the way you think about your relationships and yourself. They may even help you get free! Access the transcript, read the show notes,...

It seems like a simple question with a simple answer. But I think a lot of Christian women are confused about this. Many of us have been taught from childhood that it's rebellious for Christian women to say no. When religious people called Jesus the son of the devil, he didn’t suddenly have the thought “What if I AM the son of the devil?” Or “Why do they think that of me after all I’ve done for th...

Julie homeschooled seven children in a 900 square foot home with a man who pretended like she didn't exist. . Even though the Bible was used against her over and over again, she clung to her faith in God, and she eventually got out.  Here's her advice to others like her: "If you are a woman of faith, know in your heart that God is going to take care of you. If you are in an abusive marriage or rel...

In today's episode, Natalie, Rachel, and Becky tackle a common issue many survivors have when they begin to set boundaries. You'll also learn why taking all the responsibility in a relationship is never a win-win for anyone and what you can do instead! Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally...

"The fundamental bottom line of narcissism is that you are not a real person. You are only some other person or force that affects my life. As long as you affect my life, then I have to deal with you; but I don’t have to treat you as a real person because a narcissist literally does not see others as a real person – neither does the legalist: the legalist pastor, the legalist parent, the legalist...

Natalie interviews Pastor Dave Orrison, author of Narcissism in the Church, about how legalism breeds narcissism and vice versa. If you've been part of a religious organization that powers over and lays heavy burdens on its constituents, then you've experienced this pathological combination and the spiritual and emotional trauma it causes. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Nat...

What does the Bible mean when it tells Christian wives to “submit” to their husbands? Was this kind of submission only for that culture? Is this a free ticket for men to take power over their wives? Should a Christian wife submit to an abusive husband? What is submission, anyway? Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks...

In spite of numerous red flags, Kary married her abusive partner when she was very young. After 29 years, she was able to save some money and get out. Now she shares some insight into what made her stay for so long and what she would do differently if she had a do-over.  I asked Kary if she could go back and tell her younger self one thing, what would she say? This is what Kary said: "Stop second...

Emotional abuse tactics leave a target feeling confused and powerless. Learn some strategies to help you recognize the tactics when they happen as well as respond from a place of clarity and power. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfree...

Natalie interviews Gretchen Baskerville, author of the newly released book, The Life Saving Divorce, on the issues Christian women face when contemplating a divorce. Find out why most divorces are actually life-saving. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here Related Resources:   Connect with Gretchen on her website, Life-Saving Divorce .  Check out Gretchen's...

Learn the seven predictable things that happen when you set boundaries with an emotionally abusive partner. Knowing what to expect in advance will empower you to respond with emotional control and self-respect. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https...

After Lisa lost her husband of 23 years to death, she ended up marrying a man who abused her in every way possible. In spite of opposition from her church home, she got out of her abusive marriage and started Riverledge Farm in Vermont, a gorgeous place where she hosts wedding parties and healing retreats for survivors. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here...

This week Natalie, Becky, and Rachel answer two listener questions. I’m thinking about separating from my husband. How do I explain what’s going on to those on the outside? I’m afraid of their reactions. I was told I am “tearing down my house” when I stand up against my abusive husband and set boundaries. Is this true? Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here...

For people with trauma, the suffering doesn't end with the traumatic event. In this episode, Polly Hamp of Think Differently Counseling, Consulting, and Coaching, shares her inspiring journey of healing after trauma, including the moment she told God "hell no," but of course He won anyway. Discover new resources for overcoming your own trauma and why healing can't happen on a timetable. Access the...

Healing your faith after abuse is a long and painful process, but it's vital for true healing. Join Natalie for a lesson walking through steps that help you heal your relationship with God. Uncover the two errors that survivors often make during healing, and discover the prize for wrestling the truth from the lies you once believed. Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a...

Debby tried appeasing her abusive husband for decades, but nothing ever changed. It wasn't until she realized her health was deteriorating that she knew it was up to her to change something. Listen in to Debby's story of survival, how she got in and out of the abuse, and what happened when she went to counselors (with a twist!) Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a quest...

Learn how to talk to your children about divorce, and discover the four steps to rebuilding your life after leaving an abusive marriage. Discover one factor that is vital for healing after experiencing trauma. In this episode, Natalie interviews "Life Saving Divorce" author Gretchen Baskerville about how to cope and find healing after a life saving divorce. Access the transcript, read the show not...

Licensed clinical social worker and abuse survivor Megan Parocha shares about how to help your kids overcome trauma from abuse, divorce, and other difficult life circumstances. Hear the best way to respond when your ex-husband lies about you. Learn the parenting strategy that will help your children build up their inner world and break the generational cycle of narcissism. Access the transcript, r...

Jesus wants you to reclaim your SELF. And do you know how He helps you do that? By helping you understand the skills you already have within yourself - that HE PUT THERE - to rescue yourself. He didn’t create you to be a helpless princess in need of rescue. He created you to be Captain Marvel. In this podcast episode, Natalie will tell you about a tool with the potential to change the course of yo...

In today’s podcast episode, Natalie shares own story of how she got into an abusive marriage, why she stayed, and how she got out. Natalie kept journals throughout the course of her marriage, and in this episode she shares an inside look into her heart and belief system while she navigated the relentlessly painful circumstances of her emotionally and spiritually abusive marriage. Access the transc...

Join Natalie and Becky as they answer questions from followers of the Flying Free Facebook page, including: QUESTION ONE: Since a lot of abuse involves financial abuse, lots of us are short of cash. What are some good low-cost ways a survivor can move forward in the healing process? For example, they don’t have money for counselors, therapists, or even the Flying Free group. QUESTION TWO: When I w...

Join Natalie and Rachel as they answer two listener questions: Question One: My husband is an alcoholic and has a lot of anger toward the church and my religious beliefs. There’s also a lot of emotional abuse in our home. We have three toddlers, and I have been a stay-at-home mom. I find it hard in our marriage to raise three kids in a Christian way when my husband has a lot of anger towards my be...

When our faith is enmeshed with abuse, it's confusing to tell the two apart. That damages our connection with God. How can we untangle the lies of abuse from the truth of God? We have to do spiritual surgery on ourselves in order to remove the shrapnel of abuse from our hearts of faith--to separate the two so our hearts can beat again in a healthy, strong way in harmony with our Savior. Join Natal...