Flusterclux With Lynn Lyons: For Parents Who Worry

Do you wish your child could hear about worry directly from Lynn? Here you go! In previous episodes Lynn has spoken directly to teens; this episode is for the youngsters. She describes how worry works, what makes it better and worse, and how to externalize and talk to worry. Listen with your child!  Get 20% off your first order when you go to LIQUIDIV.com and use code FLUSTER at checkout. Go to zo...

We’ve talked about kids and phones before, but it deserves another deeper look. What’s the impact of younger and younger children having smartphones? The research shows big shifts on mental health after 2010? It’s time to talk about the consequences of smartphones seriously.  Here is the article by Jonathan Haidt which we discuss in this episode: https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2024...

Death is a part of life, but it still scares most of us. When children experience death and other types of loss, they grieve in different ways, depending on age, family culture, and personality. How can you help your child deal with loss and grief, especially when you yourself are grieving? What can parents do and say to help children navigate a painful but universal human experience? And can we d...

Every once in a while, teens need a pep talk that is based on accurate information and hopeful language about their moods, their relationships and their mental health. Anxiety and depression are common and powerful but not inevitable and certainly not permanent. Listen to this with your teen. Then, have a talk and listen more.  UPDATED: WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURC...

It’s a fact: some kids need more social coaching than others. And if your child (or you!) struggle with anxiety, practicing social skills is both more challenging and more vital. How do we enhance our kids’ ability to make good friends? The research offers some interesting do’s and don’ts that will be helpful to all parents!  UPDATED: WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES...

Lynn often says that the hardest people to work with in her practice are the ones that don’t own their own stuff. In this episode, we talk about owning patterns in your marriage. Both Robin and Lynn work with their husbands and both are consistently working on owning and breaking patterns. Do you get defensive? Of course you do! We’ll get specific in this episode.  UPDATED: WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF...

A global cognitive style, to use the fancy terminology, means that your perceptions of the world or yourself are broad and overly general: “All dogs are mean” or “I never get anything right.” Because this pattern is a solid predictor for depression and anxiety, it’s one to recognize and interrupt. We’ll talk about how to make helpful shifts in your family.  UPDATED: WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPI...

As college acceptance letters arrive, it 's timely to revisit this popular episode from Season 4! Parents and students are focusing on college admissions earlier and earlier, hoping to get a head start on what has become an increasingly competitive race through high school. They say they want their kids to be “happy” and “successful” in college, but if parents are obsessed with the "getting in," a...

Adults often wonder why the “plan” they have in place for their anxious child doesn’t work. In this episode, Lynn explains why this happens (your goals and hopes aren’t enough) and what to do instead (it’s all about the skills to manage worry when it arrives.)  UPDATED: WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, S...

Lynn often refers to anxiety as a cult leader: powerful, demanding compliance, and full of rigid rules. What happens when one family member wants out? Or when a long generational pattern of worry resists any change? In this episode, we break down the pull of the anxiety cult and how to change the rules for you and your family, even when others refuse. UPDATED: WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES...

Lately listeners have been asking about performance anxiety, particularly when it shows up in sports. Should we push our child to compete? What if they love to practice but don’t perform during games? The truth is that very few children will actually become pro athletes, so sports and other activities become opportunities to learn valuable anxiety and emotional management skills.  Here is the Toda...

What happens when children are the absolute focus of a family? Marriages suffer, says Michele Weiner-Davis, a renowned relationship expert who pulls couples back from the brink. We asked Michele to bust some couple myths and set us straight. Boy, she knows her stuff.  Books by Michelle Weiner-Davis: Divorce Busting, The Divorce Remedy, Healing from Infidelity, The Sex-Starved Marriage, The Sex-Sta...

Dating and doubt go together like peanut butter and jelly. Anxiety and worry love to invade, looking for certainty in every text, post, and conversation. And what about parenting teens through this stage? Teens are (developmentally) driving full speed while we’d like them to pump the brakes. In this episode, what you need to know about worry, dating, ruminating and relationships.  UPDATED: WE'VE M...

Seeking therapy for you or your child can feel like a big step for many reasons. Combined with busy schedules and long waiting lists, and affordability getting help can be unobtainable. In this episode, we talk about how to overcome some of those barriers, with DIY ideas and great resources available right now. Books, podcast & websites referenced in this episode: ADHD Expert Dr. Sharon Saline How...

Categories and labels are appealing because they help us make sense of a complex world. And there are definitely times when a label can help. But labels can also be limiting. When we label our kids—and when teens label themselves—we risk permanent and global identities that get in the way of growth and malleability.  WE'RE MAKING PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOP...

In this recast of a popular episode, we talk about the parenting phrases we love, how they help with emotional management, and why you need to have a few of these in your back pocket, ready to use when needed. These help for your kids whether they are 3 or 33. WE'RE MAKING PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, Start Her...

In this recast of a popular Season 5 episode, we discuss how positive connection is the goal... but is there such a thing as too connected? Yup, and it’s called enmeshment. In this episode, Lynn and Robin talk privacy, autonomy, and boundaries. If your goal is to be “best friends” with your child, have a listen.  WE'RE MAKING PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS....

Are you afraid of your anxious child’s outbursts? Are you allowing those big tantrums to rule the house and dictate your parenting? Sparked by a listener question, this episode dives into a common problem: how do we change the family patterns caused by a rigid, anxious child’s explosive behavior?  WE'RE MAKING PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our fir...

Two (really) stressed gals show up for this episode to talk about injecting fun and playfulness into holiday events. Robin and Lynn share lots of ideas wrapped up in a little encouragement, and by the end, they both feel better. We think you will, too!  WE'RE MAKING PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, Start Here For...

Not disappointing others seems like a good thing, right? But when make it your global goal, you will decrease your credibility and increase your own feelings of resentment. In this mini episode we talk about the benefits of knowing how and when to say no. WE'RE MAKING PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, Start Here For...

In this not-to-be missed episode, Lynn and Robin talk to the expert Lynn values most, Dr. Michael Yapko. Dr. Yapko is one of the world’s foremost experts on depression, how it moves through families, and what parents need to do about prevention. He knows the research and shares it, busting myths and offering advice we guarantee you haven’t heard before.  WE'RE MAKING PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO H...

Many parents struggle with the question of how to help a child who feels overwhelmed in an unfamiliar situation, by loud noises, or the start of a new activity. When do we gently push them forward, when do we let them avoid, and how do we handle our own worry so it doesn’t add to the problem?   CHECK OUT OUR PLAYLISTS ON SPECIFIC MENTAL HEALTH & PARENTING TOPICS Here is our first: Parents of Anxio...

Families will often avoid game night or other family competitions if a child has difficulty losing. Or they require the game to be “fixed” so the bad loser doesn’t lose. Games (and winning and losing) offer great opportunities to practice flexibility and emotional management, and in this mini-episode, we’ll tell you how. NEW! WE'RE MAKING PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPE...

In this recast of a popular episode from last year, we tackle the statements our friends and families use when they're staying stuck in their anxiety patterns. If you hear them or use them, listen up. We have responses ready to go. WE'RE MAKING PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, Start Here For those brand new to the...

Although the holidays can be special, the patterns that show up in people are predictable, even if it is Thanksgiving or Christmas. Critical parent? Passive aggressive sibling? Catastrophic you? In this episode, we talk about the most common and stressful holiday traps and how you and your family can disrupt them. NEW! WE'RE MAKING PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC T...