Florida Pod Men: A Florida Man Podcast

Turtle Mayor vs. Stay on Target. Our first contestant this week is a Florida Woman who wants to give a voice to nature by having a sea turtle run for mayor of her hometown (nobody has asked the turtle). She’s up against a jilted Florida Man with a 1.06% hit rate when taking vengeance on his lady’s new love. You’ll also hear the strangest sentence in Florida Pod Men history.

Canal Palindrome vs. Courtesy Flush. Water, water everywhere in this week's short episode. Our first hero tries to flee and evade police (in that order) by jumping in and out of a canal. He's up against a stinky stickler for prison toilet protocol. Chris blows the intro again.

Going to Bermuda vs. Florida Man the Vampire Slayer. This week’s contestants: A Florida man who tried to float his way to Bermuda in a giant ball vs. Another Florida man who decides to fight vampires with fire. Kevin does a bad Sting impersonation.

The Halloween special returns from the grave, kind of floats around dropping some ghoulish Florida Man stories all about town before returning to the depths of our beloved scary stupid state. It wouldn't be a complete PodMen episode without some drug use - not us by the way... for the majority of the time at least - But this time we've packed an episode full of ectoplasm (ahem!) including a doll w...

Trapped in a Closet vs. The Skelecaster. Two hapless Floridians who think they’re locked in a closet try to get out. They’re up against a Tampa musician who turns his dead uncle into a guitar. The guys decide to add a mouth trumpet and dramatic pauses to the intro.

Joey Two-Boats vs Hungry Trucker. The head of a large Florida Man family finds a strange way to dispose of a boat. He's competing against another Florida Man with poor taste (literally) in window decals for his truck. Kevin & Chris are dogsitting. 

Sock Ninja vs Deep-State Squirtgun. This week’s contest is a close one. First up we have a wannabe ninja who gets upset about socks. He’s up against a senior citizen with a golden gun. The guys struggle to choose a winner.

Dirty Roomba vs. The Chicken King This week's Florida Men: A dog owner who shoulda known better than to leave his Roomba running in a room full of dog poop. He's up against a vindictive ex-fast-food worker who (maybe) created a chicken shortage on his last day of work. Kevin has his sweariest story ever and Chris makes a delivery driver happy.

The Shoveller vs. Drug Test Trickery. Highlights from this week’s Florida Man stories: Chris reads a literary masterpiece of a restaurant review and Kevin introduces us to a drunk guy with fake bodily fluids in a bag.

Tiki Torch Mayor vs Hey Siri. This week’s competitors: A mayoral candidate armed with a tiki torch gets into a brawl with a drag queen. He is up against a Florida man who asks his digital assistant how to dispose of human remains…and it offers him advice. Kevin and Chris also hand out some restaurant tips, enjoy Siri having a virtual meltdown and discuss why the only graves ever mentioned are shal...

Mystery Egg vs. The Smuggler. Season 5 starts now! We dive into the stories behind our Headline Deathmatch Special. This week a Florida Woman does something with eggs and mailboxes and an inmate smuggles syringes in a body part that shouldn’t have syringes smuggled in. We’re finally in the same room together and Chris decides which Golden Girls actress should play him in the movie of his life.

Grab your protractors.  We're back with a special, Florida Man school-themed episode.  We have stories featuring school zone nudity, a farting gym teacher, prom-queen politics, a misspelled "scohol" zone, and more.  Chris almost introduces the wrong podcast and our loveable yet stupid digital assistant is back with an apology.  Let's get educated, Floridaman-style!

Dangerous Bookend vs GTA Florida. It’s the end of season 4. We go out with a bang when a Florida Man tries to use a live grenade as a bookend. We also meet a Florida Police Man who has trouble with his cars being stolen. Chris threatens to sit on a photocopier.

Serial Spitter vs The Burn Unit This week’s Florida Man contestants: First, a saliva launching non-flusher falls afoul of the law (and a plunger). Then, an impatient patient tries to get a nurse’s attention, with fiery consequences. Chris and Kevin continue to fail at getting a sponsor.

Hellboy vs The Unluckiest Guy in the World This weeks combatants: A Florida Man with the worst sunburn ever vs. Another Florida Man who falls afoul of sharks, monkeys, snakes, lightning…and car keys. Chris and Kevin also discuss a handy tip if you need to punch someone in the nose.

Toilet Destroyer vs. I Can See Your Brain This week combatants both feature things without lids.  One is a toilet, the other is a dude's skull. Who will win? Who will lose? Why is a man missing part of his skull? Only in Florida.

All Choked Up vs. Gator in My Pants This week’s combatants: A sexy choking mishap leads to a well-endowed Florida Man demanding a jury look at his privates so they’ll know it wasn’t his fault. That story is up against a bunch of smuggled turtles, a pant-gator and a bunch of ridiculous police charges. You probably shouldn't let the kids or grandparents listen to this episode.

It's a mid-season special! We fire up the barbecue and cook up some odds and ends of Florida Man Independence Day stories...kinda like illegal hotdogs! And, stretching the hotdog analogy too far, what toppings can we offer? Homemade fireworks, phantom gunshot wounds, Jeff Goldblum and missing genitals to name a few.

Trailer Park Full of Holograms vs. McRailing This week's competitors: A Florida Man who believes being tricked by holograms led to his wife (or girlfriend depending on who you ask) being abducted goes up against another Florida Man who gets frisky with a railing at McDonalds. At least it wasn't the ballpit.

Going 12 Rounds With Mom vs. Dr. Snip This week's competitors: A boxing glove glued to a hand leads to a controversial Florida Woman story.  She steps into the podcast ring with a DIY castration surgeon and a sheriffs department with a dumb sense of humor. Bad puns galore from the cops in this episode.

Bring Out Rambo vs Retrieve and Throw This week’s competing Florida man stories: Hilarity ensues (apparently) as police show up after reports of a domestic tussle, and a guy retrieves something from the front of his pants and throws it. We struggle to decide a winner.

Naked Taser Guy vs Swimming With Crocs Our competitors this week: A standoff between police and a Florida Man who gets increasingly naked, versus a croc-wearing Florida Man who goes for a late-night swim with a real croc. Spoiler Alert: One of them gets bitten.

Airport Security Nudity vs The Terrible Captain Our first Florida Man this week may or may not have nunchucks but definitely doesn’t have his clothes on at the airport. Then, a rum-soaked boat captain shows his lack of business sense when he threatens to throw his customers overboard. In this episode we meet our worst ever Florida Man human-being. 

IHOP Flasher vs. Pool Deck Poopers In our first story, we visit an IHOP where an outgoing Florida Man likes to introduce diners to his “little friend”. Then we meet our new hero journalist who reminds that it’s not cool to run next to the pool. Any by “run", we mean poop.  We also discuss Chris’ disguise as a famous TV artist. Come for the Florida Man stories, stay for the happy accidents.

Lamb in Your Pants vs. Shoulda Been a Foursome Hey! It’s episode 1 of a brand-new season of duelling Florida Man stories. This week’s competitors are: A Costco couple who decide to carry their groceries out of the store in unusual and illegal places, and a swingin’ Florida Woman who gets aggressive when questioned by her boyfriend about her alleged sexy group fun. Kevin and Chris plan al...