Fit, Fat and Fluctuating

How are you going to capitalize on the virus? Novelty t-shirts? Bumper stickers? How about unlicensed therapy? We're thinking way, way outside the box and bringing you along for the ride.

What if this thing never goes away? We must adapt! Starting with our favorite sources of entertainment. Follow us as we navigate through TV, music, sports and other forms of entertainment in this odd new world of isolation and disaffection.

For most people, home is a temporary prison. Your wife (the warden), your kids (cell mates) and if you've ever been to prison, you'll find many other similarities to life in the slammer. You gonna eat that corn bread??

Money making schemes from the bozos who told you to baby-bird your kids to save on your grocery bills! Want to make fast cash in a financial crisis? Sell drugs, steal cars, start podcasting! What are you waiting for? Start hustling, baby!

It's easy to lose control when the economy is tanking but we're here to tell you "it's going to be okay". We've got some money-saving alternatives to toilet paper, showering and feeding your stupid kids. You may not WANT to listen to this episode but you NEED to!

Ever wonder why you like big boobs or why the ladies only like you for your money? There is one simple answer... Science! Specifically, biology and anthropology. We look at sex and what makes us bang.

As a parent you wear many hats. Why not add teacher, gym coach, lunch lady, principal, janitor and more! We're stuck at home with the kids and we'll be damned if they return to school even dumber than when they left!

What would you do with a time machine? Play the lotto? Change the course of history? Coach your mindless, adolescent self on how to get laid? ALL OF THE ABOVE!

Finding out that Brandon was a Boy Scout is funnier than Mel Gibson converting to Judaism. Also, emergency poop stories and the at-work masturbatory habits of your favorite two numbskulls.

Just because we don't take sides doesn't mean we don't encourage you to exercise your Fifteenth Amendment. It's Super Tuesday and these pandering nincompoops remind us of everything that is wrong with our despondent system and why it's important to vote.

SEX! The good, the bad, the bumping uglies. From losing our virginity to discovering new fetishes, we let it all hang out.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling joins us for Part 2 of Try Not To visit JokeLand. We discuss Jackie's gig as the former head writer for The Howard Stern Show, his relationships with the cast and what not to say... even for the sake of comedy.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling joins us for a two part episode filled with pant-crapping shenanigans (literally). For those of you who ride the comedy short bus, Jackie is a stand-up comedian, writer, radio personality, author, and actor. He is best known as the former head writer for The Howard Stern Show .  In this sidesplitting interview, Jackie shares some of his funniest, most profound e...

Do you find yourself wondering whether or not you should jerk the damn wheel into a river? Don't do it! We give you a reason to extend your Godforsaken existence another 49 minutes in this episode about mortality and the meaning of life. Furthermore, listen as Joe mercilessly defeats Andy in the new hit Game Show "How Did They Die?". Special Guest: Joe B. (Prompt & Circumstance Podcast)

WTF did they just say!? The CIA killed Kennedy over birds? Saved By The Bell was influenced by the illuminati? These are just a couple of the preposterous plots and conspiracies examined by these discerning "theorists".  Brandon, Andy and special guest Dave Wheeler (Wheeler in the Morning Podcast) discuss the kookiest mix of contemporary and older conspiracies.

These two jerks discuss trends in Culture, Music, Food & Business and boy do they have some bold predictions for the 2020's! Also, a rare look into the world of Madam Brandonia's Prediction Palace, Brothel and Chocolaterium . Special guest: Rich "The chain-smoking millennial" Ziegler

Are you pissed off about the current state of masculinity? Have you lost all faith in mankind? Fear not... Brandon and Andy are here to help! The guys figure out how we got ourselves into this mess and more importantly, how to get us out. The Godforsaken 2010's are over and it's time for our dismal, repressed gender to start acting like true, unapologetic men. 

Our New Year's resolution is for all our listeners to gain 10 pounds so we look skinnier. Check out this "best of 2019" episode and Subscribe, Share and Follow us into 2020!!!

What do you really know about Christmas? The guys delve into the history of Christmas and attempt to rebrand the marketing behemoth to make it brighter, louder and even more in your face! Also, let's not forget about the little guys. In a March-Madness style event, Christmas defends its title against Hanukkah, Diwali, Kwanzaa and other lesser-known festivals. Happy Holidays from Try Not To Laugh P...

If we were addicted to masturbation and then became addicted to sex, would it be safe to say that our addictions got "out of hand"? From cigarettes to gambling, the guys divulge their vices and discover fixations so peculiar, they'd need an exorcism rather than an intervention.

Check your seat cushions, empty the swear jar and get that advance on your next paycheck because the holidays have arrived! Retailers and social influencers are targeting us with flashy ads but we're too smart to fall for that! Right? Oh wait... 

MILFs, GILFs and naive babysitters. It's the XXX-rated episode we've all been waiting for! The guys discuss the evolution of pornography, create their own porn parodies and share humiliating (yet creative) tales of masturbatory mayhem.  W/special guest "Heavy Milk"

It's national sweatpants day... or as some of you may call it, Thanksgiving. The guys reveal their least favorite dinner guests, concoct food combinations and rebrand Thanksgiving to give it a sexy, marketable edge.

Desperate to break free from the confines of Cable TV, the guys explore some lesser-known streaming services to cure their boredom. Sadly, no cord-cutter is safe from these hyper critical couch potatoes. 

The guys honor our troops and convince one another just how utterly useless they would be in the military. However, that won’t stop these soulless, paunchy nincompoops from cherry-picking the highest ranking jobs and demonstrating their lack of military expertise.