Find love after 40 with Renée Suzanne

How soon should you be exclusive with a man and how on earth do you find out if he’s actually seeing other women? We ladies tie ourselves in knots over this because we want to be feminine and date men who pursue us and at the same time, if you really like him you want to know where you stand. I think the best way to get this to happen is for it to be the man’s idea. Men are like cats and tend to d...

Some guys go on dating sites and apps and message all the women and just see who will respond to them. Then they send messages on and on. Maybe you even exchange numbers hoping for a real connection, but all he does is text. And text and text and text. Maybe he checks in every few days, every day or even a few times a day. Or maybe he does that maddening thing where just when you get used to heari...

I was having a conversation with a friend the other day, and was sharing the story of how I made a promise to myself, when I was single, that I would do whatever it took to find the love of my life.  She said “I thought you were going to say how you decided you loved yourself and it was OK if you never found love.” I found that to be really interesting because we hear that message so often. There...

Do you hope you’ll find love without having to date? I used to and I totally get it. Dating can be a lot of work, especially when you find it overwhelming and don’t enjoy it. But if you really want to find someone to share your life with, dating is the best, fastest, easiest way to find him. Dating is simply a skill that you can learn, just like any other skill. Learning this skill actually prepar...

Today I’m going to talk about the worst dating advice I hear all the time. I bet you’re hearing it too, even from well-meaning friends who just want to help you. But I’m here to give it to you straight and this stuff just doesn’t work and I want you to stop believing this stuff immediately. Stop looking/It’ll happen when you least expect it Ugh. This is the best way to make finding a great guy to...

Today, I'm talking with my good friend Julie Danielson about the specific challenges women face when dating after a divorce. We chat about how to put yourself back out there and attract a quality man for a healthy relationship, even if you've never experienced that before. Julie and I made alllll the mistakes, so you can learn from us and avoid the heartache and missteps we experienced and just ge...

So many women are afraid to try dating sites and apps because they hear all the horror stories. Then they wait months or even years to “meet someone the old-fashioned way”. But dating sites and apps are the best, fastest and yes, cheapest way to meet your love and some statistics suggest that you’ll have a better relationship if you use them. They give you access to men you’d never meet in real li...

Having a thick skin is helpful for a lot of things in life and dating is no exception.  Having a thick skin means that you don’t take things too personally. You understand that everyone is doing the best they can in life and is just trying to make it through the day and get the things they want. Most people do not go through life, planning ways to break your heart.  They just don’t. When you have...

Breakups are awful. I used to be the queen of getting my heart broken and it never got easier. Even my very last breakup which took place a few weeks before I met my husband was devastating. I did learn a lot though, and I have some great pointers to help you get through this and come out of it stronger and more likely to get into a better relationship next time. It won’t be easy, but it will be w...

So many women are afraid to say that they want something serious, so they try to play it cool and act like they’re up for anything. Or maybe you really are up for anything at this time in your life. You may just be looking to date around and see how things go. Either way, how you word this in your dating profile and conversations with men is important, because men are pretty fixed in what they’re...

I see so many women miss connections with promising men all the time. Here’s how it often goes down. She meets a guy on a dating site/app and he very enthusiastically pursues her. He sends her messages, gets her number, texts, calls her and tries to schedule a date with her. She feels overwhelmed with the attention and shuts him down. She then goes on to complain that there’s no one good to date o...

I have 20 years of dating experience and another 9 years of coaching experience behind me, and experience has taught me that there are men you should stop seeing immediately if you want to get into a long term relationship. Here they are: Anyone who doesn’t share your relationship goals Anyone who issues you a disclaimer Anyone who doesn’t follow up within a day or 2 after a date Anyone who doesn’...

I get so many questions about how to go from chatting on dating sites and apps to actually going on dates. This can feel clunky and awkward, especially if you’re not used to online dating. Some women make the mistake of waiting way too long to give men their phone number and end up missing out on connecting with anyone. Because the truth is, men who are ready for a relationship aren’t going to mes...

You can and should be asking questions when you’re dating. You cannot afford to assume anything. If you’re looking for a committed relationship, you need to find out if guys are on the same page on the very first date. Here’s why: You’ll never care less than you will then Neither will he, so he’s much more likely to tell you the truth As awkward as it may feel, it will never be easier to ask than...

Unpopular opinion: You can help who you're attracted to. And if you're attracted to men who don't treat you well or want to date you or call you back, it might be a good idea to start figuring out how to change that. Because you absolutely can. I help women do this all day long and I did it myself. Like many other wonderful things in life, good men can be an acquired taste. Here are some practical...

This might sound crazy, but I bought my wedding dress 15 years before my actual wedding. Back in the early 2000’s, I was a stressed out single mom and my daughter worked at a bridal shop. It was on my way home from work and I would often stop by to say hi to her. I’m a girly girl and the allure of all those beautiful gowns was irresistible. I’d never worn one before then. So it was absolutely into...

I don’t love long distance relationships because dating after 40 is hard enough without creating extra difficulties. In my opinion, “long distance” is anyone who is over 90 minutes away from you. Dating local men will save you so much trouble and drama. Here are my top reasons why I don’t recommend dating long distance: *It ties you up and keeps you unavailable to local men who may be better candi...

Your picture is so important. It's the first time a man sees you. Yes, men read the profiles. At least the kinds of men you want to date will. But he needs to click on your picture in order to read it. So, what makes a great profile picture? I'm glad you asked! Here are some sugestions: *You alone *Smiling no-weird duck/pouty face *Look straight at the camera *No filters *No hats/sunglasses *Not i...

Do you place impossible conditions on the kinds of men you’re willing to date? For example, does he have to be a member of your (very fringe) religion? Share every single one of your 117 very specific political views? Be a super fan of some band that only 9 people in the world have ever heard of? Share your passion for raising wild iguanas in Madagascar? If so, you’re literally keeping yourself fr...

If you’re worried about online scammers you really don’t need to be. Think about it logically. Scammers don’t just reach through your screen the minute you post your dating profile and drain your bank account. There are several things that need to happen before it comes to that. They’ll need to contact you, start a conversation, hook you and ask you for money. You will have choices about how you r...

This week I interviewed my fitness coach Jo of Couture Fitness. She shares how we can actually repair our metabolism, no matter how old we are or what we've done in the past, so that we can meet our health and fitness goals. I'm working with her personally and improving my body composition and feeling great. It's not a quick fix, but it is a game-changer. So many women tell me they'd love to feel...

I see this all the time; Someone has a dating disappointment or is just plain scared and says she’s going to wait on God or the Universe to bring her a good man. I get it. I spent many years doing this myself. I don’t recommend it. God and the Universe love you and want to help you, they really do. And they want you to help yourself. Finding love is a lot like your very own personal development pr...

Meet one of my fabulous mentors Bobbi Blum Palmer! I met her at a workshop I attended when I was in my 40's and trying to figure out how to date. She is a dating coach and became a first-time bride at age 47. I'm forever grateful to her for her work and influence in my life. She teaches her clients how to prioritze what's important in a mate when you're in your 40's and beyond so that you can actu...

Buckle up ladies, there’s a truth bomb coming here. So many women, including myself a few years back, need to take this to heart, so I’m going to spill the beans. If you haven’t found anyone you want to date for months or even years, I want you to perk up your ears. You might be an alpha widow. According to the googles, an “alpha widow'' is someone who compares the men who are available to her unf...

Do you believe any of these unhelpful things about dating? "I'm too {heavy, skinny, old, young, broke, successful, smart, etc.} to find love" These things are always a lie However {fill in the blank} you are, a quick Google search will most likely reveal someone with your exact situation who has indeed found love. So can you. But you must stop telling yourself how hopeless it is, how awful dating...