ESSAY Magazine (An International Journal of Sexaholics Anonymous)

You are invited to read this "Editor's Corner" in your home group during announcements.   The August 2026 edition of ESSAY Magazine is a powerful theme that breaks open the topic of sharing in meetings. The hope that this topic brings is for the opportunity to grow in understanding and effectiveness in carrying the message in meetings. One member shares how moving away from cussing removed his sel...

Time Out Sponsor by mail helped him to address what was buried and oozing out. All my life, I looked like I had it together—married, seven children, active in serving others, and a belief in a Higher Power. But for 27 years, I lived a double life, trapped in pornography and secrets.

A Letter of Concern to Us All This is a portion of the SA Trustees’ letter to us all regarding the crisis of the Seventh Tradition.  June, 2026 Greetings SA Groups, We give thanks for you, your Group, and for the hope of recovery from sexual addiction you represent in your community. We all unite around the Fifth Tradition: “Each group has but one primary purpose – to carry its message to the sexa...

Recovery shows him the damage that swearing and sarcasm cause to others and to himself. I most often raise my hand during SA meetings when a member’s share includes successive instances of swearing. I feel and see the pain in the speaker, and that pain projected at others in the room. I hear their self-hate and feel the words burying into my similarly wounded soul. I raise my hand and often take t...

The Program taught her how to embrace every healing aspect of Recovery, Unity, and Service. “What happened to you?” my grandmother asked. I was eight years old. Silence. I had been raped by my father. He told me if I told my mother, I would kill her; did that apply to my grandmother too? I took no chances and stayed silent. My fantasy world began, and I gained 30 pounds that year. The weight gain...

He learned boundaries that allowed him to share safely and listen attentively.  There is a time to speak and a time to listen. I had to relearn how to talk and listen in the rooms in order to stay in the Fellowship and keep working the Steps. When I first came to the rooms, I was brash and egotistical. My unhelpful shares were full of platitudes of SA sayings and advice to think positively. Afterw...

She is so grateful that the Steps taught her how to connect using safe, healthy sharing.  When I built a wall between me and those I loved, I severed connection to God and others.  I completely separated myself when I was four years old because I was raging at everyone. 

Recovery was not something to observe on the sidelines of life, but rather something to be lived.  When I first came into the Fellowship, I was confounded and confused. I had no idea how to recover and definitely no recovery experience to share. So, I simply sat in meetings and absorbed the knowledge, information, and, most importantly, the experience, strength, and hope (ESH) that others had and...

The literature on sharing in meetings helped her apply boundaries to protect her sobriety. One of the earliest pieces my sponsor recommended I read and journal my thoughts on was the section in the White Book called “Meetings—How They Work” (SA 185).  In particular, the “Meeting Guidelines” (SA 188-189). These pages set me up wonderfully for a lifetime of appropriate sharing and listening in SA me...

90 days in Nashville for a breakthrough in recovery from lust Yesterday, I got in my apartment and spent my first night in my twin bed… a bit sleepless in the beginning. My first thought when I saw the beautiful twin bed was, of course, “Who will I get in here?” 

She is grateful that instead of acting out, she is working the Program. I am Mirsha, a sexaholic. I have been in the Program for nine months, with three months of sobriety and two relapses. A few days ago, I received a friend request on Facebook. I asked myself why I liked him and whether it was a good idea to add him, since I am committed to respecting and valuing him as a human being.

Bringing the inside out has taught her how to connect with members in the Fellowship. My name is Margot. I am a sexaholic. My sobriety date, through God’s grace and the grace of the Program, is March 14, 1986. My history is that I acted out, first with myself and then with others, for about 30 years before I found this Program. 

Sharing responsibly allows him to thrive in healthy connections. What is “Healthy”? For me, being healthy means letting go of the need to see everything as good or bad, right or wrong. Instead, it is about viewing life organically—focusing on functionality and balance, and asking, “Am I thriving?” It means being at peace with the tension between my weaknesses and strengths, my failures and accompl...

Tradition Three allows her to stay in SA and receive a life of recovery and growth. I have been in SA for over eight years now. SA is my home. I’ve been told that I’m not a sexaholic and I don’t need this program. But I’m back today because I decided that Tradition Three states that the only requirement for membership is a desire to stop lusting and become sexually sober–and for that, I qualify. I...

Sharing only what happened before and after sobriety, he lets God reveal the degree of happiness through his shine. We carry the great message to all who have lost hope in coping with addiction to lust. There is the Great Fact for us, and that is nothing more than a “deep and powerful experience” changing everything in our lives.

Electing leaders allows the Fellowship to keep authority, while elements of the service structure can decide according to informed conscience.  Concept 2 The leadership of SA, as represented by the General Delegate Assembly and the Board of Trustees, has become for nearly every practical purpose the active voice and the effective conscience of our whole society in its service matters. 

Catching recovery occurs when seeking continuous service and rather than seeking self-gratification. While attending May’s Pittsburgh retreat, I saw many forms of service essential to the SA Program. Service, one of SA’s Three Legacies, was the first opportunity the fellowship gave me to put others before myself without self-centered motives. It remains one of the primary ways I use the tools of t...

A day to have as much fun as possible. We had our first SA conference in a long time. It was different from most conferences because we tried something different. We had only a few meetings. A member from Melbourne spoke about how to build a strong Fellowship. A woman from Perth spoke about fear and resentment, and Jason told a powerful story of redemption in the SA prison space. A long-timer spok...

Celebrating our founder was a celebration of everyone. Remembering our founder, Roy K., and his courageous effort to establish Sexaholics Anonymous, we recall with immense gratitude the first SA meeting on February 4, 1979.

  הוא למד גבולות שאפשרו לו לשתף בבטחה ולהקשיב בתשומת לב יש זמן לדבר, ויש זמן להקשיב. אני הייתי חייב ללמוד מחדש איך לדבר ולהקשיב בחדרים כדי שאוכל להישאר בחברותא ולהמשיך את עבודת הצעדים. כשהגעתי לראשונה לחדרים, הייתי יהיר ואנוכי. השיתופים הלא מועילים שלי היו מלאים בסיסמאות נפוצות של SA, והייתי חוזר לעודד חשיבה חיובית. אחר כך הייתי ממתין לקבל את מחיאות הכפיים והחיוכים. כשלא קיבלתי אף תגובה, הייתי גול...

  היא אסירת תודה שהצעדים לימדו אותה איך להתחבר בעזרת שיתוף בריא ובטוח כשבניתי חומה בין עצמי ואלו שאהבתי, ניתקתי את החיבור שלי מאלהים ומאחרים. ניתקתי את עצמי לגמרי כשהייתי בת ארבע בגלל שזעמתי על כולם

  ההחלמה אינה דבר שצופים בו מן הצד, אלא דבר שצריך לחיות אותו כשהגעתי לראשונה לחברותא, הייתי נבוך ומבולבל. לא היה לי מושג כיצד מחלימים, ובוודאי שלא היה לי ניסיון בהחלמה שאותו אוכל לחלוק. לכן פשוט ישבתי במפגשים וספגתי את הידע, המידע, ובעיקר את הניסיון, הכוח והתקווה שאחרים צברו ושיתפו. כך נמשך הדבר במשך חודשים

ספרות על השיתוף בקבוצות עזרה לה ליישם גבולות ולשמור על פכחונה אחד החלקים הראשונים בספרות שעליו הספונסר שלי המליץ, שאותו קראתי וגם עליו כתבתי את מחשבות שלי היה החלק בספר הלבן שנקרא ''מפגשים - כיצד זה עובד'' (ע''מ 185) ובמיוחד החלק שנקרא ''הנחיות למפגשים'' (ע''מ 188-189). עמודים אלו הכינו אותי בצורה נפלאה לחיים שלמים של שיתוף והקשבה ראויים בפגישות SA

  ההחלמה מראה לו את הנזק שניבולי פה ועוקצנות גורמים לאחרים ולעצמו  לרוב אני מרים את היד במפגשי SA כאשר החלוקה של מישהו כוללת ניבולי פה חוזרים ונשנים. למה? אני מרגיש ורואה את הכאב האצור בתוך הדובר, והכאב הזה מושלך על אחרים בחדר. כאשר אני שומע חבר SA שמנבל את הפה, אני שומע את השנאה העצמית שלו, ואני מרגיש איך המילים האלו מתחפרות לתוך הנפש שלי שפגועה באופן דומה. באופן פיזי, רגשי ורוחני אני מרגיש את מש...

  התכנית לימדה אותה כיצד לאמץ כל היבט מרפא של החלמה, אחדות ושירות "מה קרה לך?" סבתי שאלה. הייתי בת שמונה. דממה. נאנסתי על ידי אבי. הוא אמר לי שאם אגיד לאמי, הוא יהרוג אותה; האם זה תקף גם לסבתי? לא לקחתי סיכונים ושתקתי. עולם הפנטזיה שלי התחיל, ועליתי 14 קילו באותה שנה. עליית המשקל היית הגנה מאבי – אולי הוא לא יחשוב יותר שאני מושכת. נהייתי מאוד מופנמת ומבודדת. עמיתיי ללימודים קראו לי 'הנזירה'. עברתי...