Helena Hickman

Escape the Paradox

Health EN ↓ 18 episodes

Covering: Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma | PTSD | C-PTSD | Trauma Recovery | Emotional and Psychological Abuse Welcome to Escape the Paradox, where I expose the hidden reality of coercive control and domestic violence including psychological, emotional and physical abuse. I’m Helena, a survivor of childhood abuse. I'm a mental health nursing student and advocate, here to support you in breaking free from the confusion, fear, and isolation that abuse creates. Home should be the safest place, but for many,...

Author

Helena Hickman

Episodes

Psychopathy - Diagnosis 30.06.2026 34:15

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma This will be a two-part episode on Psychopathy. I have used a lot of research on this episode, so this isn't as juicy as you might be hoping! It's very technical and focuses on the diagnostic criteria from a forensic psychiatry perspective. Hopefully you...

Borderline Personality Disorder - Diagnosis, Women, and Trauma 22.12.2025 48:23

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma I think you are worth the effort of healing. In this (long) episode, I examine the diagnostic criteria of Borderline Personality Disorder, focusing on how the diagnosis is disproportionately applied to women and deeply intertwined with histories of trauma. It exp...

Bonus! Poem by Helena Hickman - "Restoration" 12.09.2025 1:49

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma This bonus episode shares a poem I wrote on self-worth, confronting reality, and the work of restoring the mind from broken parts. Welcome to Escape the Paradox , a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and...

Challenge Negative Thoughts about your Worth | During and After Coercive Control, Abuse, Domestic Violence, Childhood Trauma 12.09.2025 24:18

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma I think you are worth the effort of healing. Worthlessness speaks in absolutes, but that doesn’t make it true. In this episode, I explore what happens when you stop taking the voice at face value and begin challenging the thoughts that try to define you. This e...

Choosing a Therapist or Counsellor | During and After Coercive Control, Abuse, Domestic Violence, Childhood Trauma 05.08.2025 16:42

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma Finding the right therapist or counsellor can feel overwhelming, especially after experiencing abuse or trauma (or maybe while you're still experiencing it). In this episode, I share practical tips for choosing a professional who truly understands coercive co...

Smear Campaigns | What They Are, How to Spot Them, and How to Cope 22.06.2025 26:00

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma When you leave an abusive relationship, especially one marked by coercive control, it’s not uncommon for the abuser to launch a smear campaign . This is a deliberate attempt to discredit you, isolate you, and control the narrative after you’ve left. In this episod...

Feelings of Guilt After Leaving Abusive, Coercive Relationships 18.05.2025 21:23

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma " I feel guilty" If you’ve escaped coercive control or domestic violence, you’re probably no stranger to guilt. Feeling responsible for the pain your abuser claims to suffer after you leave is common. In this episode, I explore what guilt is, why it&apo...

Using Children as Tools of Control in Relationships & Guest Kalesha Shares her Story 02.05.2025 40:06

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, I am joined by Kalesha, who bravely shares her personal story of surviving domestic abuse, and the current healing journey she is on. Together, we explore how children are often used as tools of manipulation and control in abusive relationships, which is a heartbreaking but critical aspect of coercive control that’s not discussed often enough. The interview is an...

Male Privilege and Entitlement within Coercive Control, Domestic Violence, Abuse, and Relationships 21.04.2025 24:28

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma In this episode, I’m talking about how male privilege is used as a tool for control in abusive relationships. This isn’t just about physical violence. I focus on the subtle, everyday ways power and entitlement show up and are reflected hugely in overrepresentation...

Gaslighting (Minimizing, Denying, Blaming) in Coercive Control, Domestic Violence, Abuse, and Relationships – Part 2: Continuing My Exploration of Manipulation in my Father’s Correspondence 01.04.2025 43:34

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma In this episode, I continue analyzing past correspondence between myself and the abuser, focusing on the tactics of minimizing, denying, and blaming. I break down how these strategies are used to distort reality, shift responsibility, and keep targets trapped in c...

Gaslighting (Minimizing, Denying, Blaming) in Coercive Control, Domestic Violence, Abuse, and Relationships – Part 1: My Exploration of Manipulation in my Father’s Correspondence 17.03.2025 35:39

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma In this episode, I explore a message I wrote to my father in 2023, and take you through his response with me. It’s a raw and honest conversation that highlights the tactics of minimizing, denying, and blaming, which are patterns that are reflected in the power and...

Isolation in Relationships: Understanding Abuse, Domestic Violence, and Coercive Control 28.02.2025 26:57

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma Isolation is one of the most powerful tools of coercive control, and it goes far beyond just cutting someone off from friends and family. In this episode, we explore how abusers use suspicion, false accusations, and emotional manipulation to make their targets fee...

Emotional and Psychological Abuse – Part 2: Impact of Emotional and Psychological Abuse on the Target within Relationships 14.02.2025 24:53

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma Emotional abuse doesn’t just wound in the moment—it rewires the way we see ourselves. Over time, the insults, gaslighting, and manipulation become our own inner voice, eroding self-trust and self-worth. In Part 2, let's dive into how abuse shapes our internal...

Emotional and Psychological Abuse – Part 1: Understanding Coercive Control and Domestic Violence in Relationships 08.02.2025 29:38

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma Emotional abuse leaves no visible scars, but its impact runs deep. In this episode of Escape the Paradox , I talk about how emotional abuse erodes self-worth, distorts reality, and keeps targets trapped in cycles of self-doubt. I’ll share how it manifests in both...

Intimidation in Relationships: Understanding Abuse, Domestic Violence, and Coercive Control 24.01.2025 28:10

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma In this episode, I delve into the element of intimidation in abusive relationships and how it oppresses the target, making escape incredibly challenging. I also share my personal experience with the very real tactics abusers use to discredit their targets, adding...

Coercion and Threats in Relationships: Understanding Abuse, Domestic Violence, and Coercive Control 17.01.2025 31:27

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma In this episode of Escape the Paradox , let's delve into the "Coercion and Threats" section of the Power and Control Wheel. Learn how abusers use coercive tactics to instill fear and maintain control over their targets. Learn to recognize these beha...

Abuse is Abuse: Why Labels Don't Help (even if they are a psychopath or narcissist) 10.01.2025 22:19

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma In this very first episode of Escape the Paradox, I explore a common misconception: the idea that labeling an abuser—whether as a narcissist, psychopath, or anything else—somehow explains, or excuses, their behavior. Abuse isn’t about a diagnosis; it’s about acti...

Introduction: Breaking My Paradox 07.01.2025 2:57

Send us Fan Mail Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma This podcast discusses sensitive topics, including coercive control and the emotional impact of abuse. In this introduction, I share why I believe it’s so important to learn how to verbalize the impact coercive control has. By sharing my truth, I hope to help othe...