Dying to Tell You

Difficult situations can either harden our hearts or open them. And generosity is a choice that each of us can make to resist hardening ourselves, to instead soften and be a safe place for others who might be feeling vulnerable and in need. Join Cody for this week's reflection on generosity and softening our hearts in the face of difficulty, thoughts inspired by his conversation last week with Jod...

Jody Gelb had a calm, healthy pregnancy — and then, in the span of a single hospital stay, everything changed. A rushed delivery. Forceps. A baby who wasn't breathing. An emergency trip to the NICU before Jody had even held her daughter. Days later, a nurse handed her the poem "Welcome to Holland," a metaphor often given to parents of children with special needs. You planned a trip to Italy, you l...

Sometimes it takes the unexpected—even the unwanted—to remind us of the extraordinary experience of living.  In our first Reflection of Season 4, Cody shares his thoughts on his conversation with Keaton, a young father who was living what he called an "ordinary life" until his diagnosis of cancer. Listen to Keaton's full story here or on dttypodcast.com .  Be sure to join our community on Patreon...

At 35, Keaton was an "average guy" — husband, dad to a two-year-old, into cooking and woodworking — until a routine ER visit found tumors on his liver. Now living with intrahepatic cholangiocarcinoma , Keaton talks with Cody about what it took to get his doctors to listen, the loneliness of "cancer planet," and chasing a shot at a liver transplant — all while training to climb Mount Rainier for ca...

As we get ready to start Season 4 of Dying To Tell You (next week!), we wanted to share with you the first episode of each preceding season. Our final encore episode this week is Sue.  In this first episode from Season 3, Sue shares her beautiful story with us all the way from Melbourne, Australia. She found us through the podcast Chris produces for Sounds True, " Insights At The Edge ." (Thank yo...

As we get ready to start Season 4 of Dying To Tell You (can you believe it?), we wanted to share with you the first episode of each preceding season. This week is Aimee, who kicked off Season 2.  Aimee is the daughter of Linda, who was a guest of the show in Season 1. As Linda approached the end of her life, she chose M.A.I.D. (Medial Aid In Dying), which is legal in Colorado. With the approval of...

As we get ready to start Season 4 of Dying To Tell You (can you believe it?), we wanted to share with you the first episode of each preceding season, starting with the man who started it all—Aaron.  If you're not familiar with Aaron's story, we were connected with him before the pandemic as a possible first guest for this show. And of course, we had to put everything on hold while the planet shut...

Dying To Tell You is a weekly podcast about death, dying, and life. Palliative Care Chaplain Cody Hufstedler sits down with people living with terminal illness for intimate conversations exploring how facing our finish line brings clarity, wisdom, even joy. Join these people who are facing everything from cancer and ALS to Alzheimer’s and rare diseases to hear wonderfully insightful explorations o...

In our last reflection of the season, Cody looks back on his conversation with Clara as well as the entire congregation of guests we were honored to talk with over the past year. Clara's statement that cancer takes and takes and takes but it also gives inspired this meditation on flexibility, multiple truths, and staying open to whatever comes our way.  Thank you for listening to the stories of ou...

At age 31, Clara sits down with Cody to discuss a year that changed everything. What started as hip pain from running turned into a devastating diagnosis: Stage 4 Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer with metastases to her bones, liver, brain, and pelvis. Clara shares her journey through aggressive chemotherapy that nearly killed her, the difficult decision to stop treatment, and facing the loss of her abil...

Amanda returns to the podcast with a callback update after her 20-month scan revealed a tiny recurrence. Her second craniotomy was scheduled for 2/3/2026...yesterday. Cody and Amanda discuss her declining a pre-surgery clinical trial, weighing expensive treatment options abroad, and the emotional and financial challenges of deciding next steps, while leaning on the Glioblastoma (GBM) community for...

This week's reflection from Cody explores Emily Pearl Kingsley’s parable “Welcome to Holland” alongside Rachel’s real-life story: a young woman whose plans for a big-city life and long career are interrupted by cancer. It traces her grief, adjustment, and the ways she reframes her life. Through Rachel’s experience, this week's episode reflects on choosing how to live when plans change—acknowledgin...

“I kept expecting to die. But I haven’t died yet...there’s still time left and it's navigating how and what space do you live in every day.” At 26, Rachel was living her dream life in Chicago. She’d moved from her small town Texas roots and was young, independent, and thriving in the city. But mysterious symptoms that began in college refused to go away. After being dismissed by doctor after docto...

Amanda's mantra as she was entering brain surgery really stuck with Cody after last week's interview: "Stay awake. Stay alert. This is my life."  In this week's episode, Cody reflects on presence versus resignation, invoking Eckhart Tolle’s teaching and examining how often we try to merely get through life instead of fully living it. Amanda’s courage and focus become a model for noticing the prese...

“I kept saying...what is the best possible outcome right now?” Amanda is a 43-year-old ultra endurance athlete who began experiencing strange symptoms in 2024: pressure headaches, déjà vu, vision problems, and eventually bizarre behaviors like eating off an upside-down plate and walking out of her shoe without noticing. After an urgent care doctor dismissed her symptoms as TMJ (lockjaw?!), her leg...

In this week's reflection on his interview with Shutes—which, of course, you should go listen to—Cody discusses the recurring theme of loneliness among people living with chronic illness or experiencing grief. Or really, anyone. As some of you might know, this year Cody left his job and, more importantly, co-workers he cares deeply for. And so the theme of loneliness applies not just to those with...

“I’m part gargoyle is what I tell people. Because I’m turning to stone. I literally am.” Shutes was living the dream—college basketball national champion, Player of the Year, in the best shape of her life—when strange symptoms started appearing. Numbness in her hands. A sore that wouldn’t heal. She was initially misdiagnosed with lupus before a doctor recognized the signs and finally told her the...

"My main point here is how important it is for you to continue to be your own health advocate."   In this callback episode we check back in with Joe, whose interview aired a few weeks ago but was actually recorded nearly a year ago in December of 2024. Joe has had new developments with his cancer and is now facing the incredibly difficult choice of undergoing life-altering surgery...or not. There...

Cody gives us one more update on Joe's progress and shares his thoughts on what it means to facing turning points in our lives, the nature of life's uncertainty—particularly in the context of palliative care—and the difficulty of preparing for the unknown. Cody reflects on the need to have faith in one's ability to navigate through uncertain times, celebrating the small certainties in life while a...

“The people we have on the podcast, they’re just so special.” Cody and Chris (that’s us!) sit down to toast three amazing years of Dying to Tell You for their annual Thanksgiving gratitudes. As always, we are deeply grateful to the guests who have shared their time and their experiences with us and, through us, with so many others out in the world. Their words, their insights, their emotions—all o...

Joe was just 29 years old when a colonoscopy revealed stage four colorectal cancer—a diagnosis he'd put off for months despite troubling symptoms. What followed was years of surgeries, chemotherapy, an ileostomy, and the constant roller coaster of scans and treatment. When Cody sat down with Joe nearly a year ago, he was doing well and treatment-free, but knowing that every three months a bad scan...

"What am I holding onto so tightly that I would never change?"  Our guest last week (and the week before!), Becca, once declared she'd never undergo treatment again—until her cancer returned and she found herself asking how they'd treat it. We often know exactly what we're going to do in difficult situations...until we don't. This week, Cody reflects on psychological flexibility and the profound c...

"I wanted quality of life over quantity of life. If I have six months, then I will live the hell out of those six months. If I have 30 years, that would be fabulous." After 18 months of cancer treatment that left her in constant pain, Becca made a choice that surprised even her doctors: she stopped treatment, even though it was working. Her scans show no evidence of active disease, yet she's chose...

“Please—all of you people out there—don’t wait until you’re dying to see the beauty in life.” Becca was diagnosed with stage two breast cancer at 34, went into remission, and eleven years later—when she thought she was in the clear—her cancer returned as stage four metastatic disease. What followed was a journey through brutal treatment side effects, painful decisions about quality versus quantity...

🚗💨 The Power of Pumping the Brakes... In this episode, Cody reflects on last week's conversation with Lonnie about the importance of finding meaning and purpose in life, especially when previous sources of meaning are no longer available. Cody delves into the concept of the therapeutic pause and pumping the brakes—taking time to process and make thoughtful decisions in high-stress situations. Dr...