Divorce University Online

Feelings – Yours, Mine, and Ours! In Episode 51 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we discuss the root of many problems before, during and after divorce, feelings. Feelings around divorce are a constant rollercoaster, one day you're happy your ex is gone, the next you feel angry about it, and the next you are in total grief and crying about it. Sound familiar? Yeah, we've been there too. So...

It's All About Control! In Episode 50 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we discuss our human need for control, which is at the heart of conflict in many divorce cases. Many times the conflict shifts from trying to influence your spouse to trying to influence the Court. And the Court often becomes a "superparent" in these battles. So, how do you stop the struggle for control and minimize th...

Vindication: The Heart of Post-Divorce Conflict. In Episode 49 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we discuss our human need for vindication. We see it in almost every case and it's natural. More importantly, it's the driving force behind a vast majority of high-conflict Court battles. If vindication is what so many are seeking, why is it we rarely see the Court process satisfy this need? It...

No Fault Divorce…….Really? In Episode 48 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we look back on the evolution of "no fault divorce" and examine how the shift to no fault divorce changed the divorce process. What was the idea behind the "no fault" revolution? Did it accomplish what the Court's were trying to accomplish. Do we really have "no fault" divorce? How did this influence the battlegroun...

Cover Your……..Monkey's Butt! In Episode 47 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we discuss three specific action that make you look like a "monkey's butt" to the Court and to your ex. Why should you care? Because this can have a significant impact on your case. We also discuss what you can do to turn it around if you've made mistakes that leave the Court thinking you are the problem instead o...

Got Parental Alienation? In Episode 46 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we discuss the devastation that is parental alienation. As much as we would love to think one parent would never do this to another, it happens. So what should you do? How do you handle this? And, more importantly, what shouldn't you do? The Court often has difficulty dealing with this issue and that's why your own ac...

Why Won't the Pain Stop?! In Episode 45 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we discuss the pain that is divorce. We always say that if a person has never been through a divorce, you can't possibly explain the extreme emotional pain of it. We often try to (unknowingly) hold on to the relationship and since we are divorcing, the only way to do that is through negative contact, or pain. This re...

DON'T Behave the Way You Feel! In Episode 44 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we discuss how important it is for you to behave differently than you feel. Let's face it, we are often filled with grief and extreme emotion at a point where the Court is expecting "Adult Behavior" from us.  You can't always control the way you feel but there are things you can do to help you control the way yo...

REVENGE: We All Want It! In Episode 43 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we discuss the most common feeling we see in working with divorcing clients, the desire for revenge. While we aren't always willing to admit this feeling, we definitely all have it on some level. We have the need for revenge because we all want vindication, whether it's financial or emotional. So, what can you do? How...

The Five Stages of Divorce Grief Recovery. In Episode 42 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we discuss the emotional process of moving through divorce which in effect, is a process of grieving. If you are familiar with the work of Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, you'll recognize our discussion around the 5 stages. No matter what stage you're at, you'll recognize parts of yourself and current emotion...

Wisdom from on High – 5 Biblical Quotes to Live By After Divorce or Separation. In Episode 41 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we share our 5 favorite biblical verses that helped us personally during our divorces. Divorce is not easy regardless of which religious beliefs you hold. However, the Bible can provide us with some comfort and wisdom to help us understand how to deal with what is...

One Powerful Idea to Revolutionize Your Co-Parenting Relationship. In Episode 40 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we analyze the difficulties of co-parenting. How do you deal with conflict? How do you get privacy from your ex and get them to leave you alone? Most parents are frustrated with their co-parent and the manipulation that is often used by one of the parties to cause the other pa...

Do You Know the ONE Resource That Will Turn the Tables on Your Divorce? In Episode 39 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we help you assess what you actually want from your post-divorce life and how to get it. Most people utilize resources such as aggressive lawyers, financial experts and therapists to try to help them get to their post-divorce life. Often, these resources keep you stuck in...

How can you combat post-divorce grief? In Episode 38 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we examine the different areas of our lives that grief can creep into following a divorce. In our experience working with clients, this is an area that everyone struggles with. We'll also each share how this affected each of andus personally, professionally, and on the homefront during our divorces 13 ye...

How do you handle the religious training of children after divorce? In Episode 37 of the Divorce University Online Podcast, we walk you through many of the struggles co-parents have around this issue. What if one of you isn't religious or doesn't attend church? What if you have different religions? How do you talk to the kids about attending separate churches post break-up? And what do you do for...

Welcome to Episode 36 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In Episode 36, I Am Not a Victim, we help you reframe the mindset that traps many of us during divorce. It's common to feel that your spouse destroyed your family by having affairs, spending excessively, constantly criticizing or whatever other issues broke down your marriage. This puts us in a mindset of "I can't because" and when we...

Welcome to Episode 35 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In Episode 35, Understanding Attorney Retainers, Fees, and Billing, we try to remove the confusion around attorney fees. Many divorcing people have never had a prior need for legal services and don't understand an attorney retainer or how it works. Furthermore, they don't understand how billing and fees are charged to them and are oft...

Welcome to Episode 34 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In Episode 34, Divorce Court Process Flyover – Understanding the Basics, we talk about the legal process that everyone goes through during divorce. It's important to have a basic understanding of the process so that you can make decisions regarding your case. Divorce is a lawsuit that involves pleadings, motions, discovery, and trial....

Welcome to Episode 33 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In Episode 33, What Are Your Divorce Superpowers?, we talk about  common feelings we all have during divorce such as anxiety, anger, fear, and depression. Then, we help you discover the divorce superpower lurking inside of you that will help you fight those enemies. Finding your inner Superman or Wonderwoman is easier than you think....

Welcome to Episode 32 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In Episode 32, The Number One Divorce Secret: It Will Be Better Tomorrow, we talk about the crisis of divorce that almost every single person experience including the strong illusion that your current misery will last forever. Fortunately, it won't. Divorce is a transition to a new life. But how do you get to that new life? What steps...

Welcome to Episode 31 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In Episode 31, Four Weapons That Demolish Post-Separation Negativity, we talk about the common cycle of negativity often see in newly separated people. Hurt, anger, and resentment are common emotions in divorce and unfortunately, many people stay stuck in those emotions for extended periods of time. Often our exes are the target of th...

Welcome to Episode 30 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In Episode 30, How to Turn Around a Bad Child Custody Situation, we talk about what to do if you have a restraining order, are on supervised visitation, or just have less parenting time than you wanted. Thomas always says child custody is a marathon not a sprint and we're going to help you run that marathon in a way that will help you...

Welcome to Episode 29 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In Episode 29, The Secret to Healthy Post-Divorce Relationships, we talk about what caused the misery in our previous relationship, how we can get ourselves emotionally healthy, and how not to get ourselves into the same situation all over again! If you're anything like us, you definitely have no desire to repeat the past! Understandi...

Welcome to Episode 28 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In Episode 28, Five Resolutions to Transform You After Divorce, we talk about how maddening the divorce process is for most people. It is inherently negative and therefore, easily framed in negative ways by those of us going through it. Unfortunately, the Court process only perpetuates more negativity. But what if there was a way to t...

Welcome to Episode 27 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In Episode 27, Courts Can't Change Your Ex, we talk about most peoples' desire for the Court to know what's going on in their situation. Courts are really good at managing big issues but not so good at managing the day-to-day aspects of relationships. So, what do you do? Join us as we talk about solutions to the day-to-day issues and...