Divorce University Online

Top 5 Accusations in Child Custody Court - Episode 348 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Accusations abound in child custody court but we typically see a few issues that appear repeatedly. In this episode, I'll discuss the 5 most common ones that I see and how to navigate them in the courtroom. To learn more about how I can support you in achieving success in your custody matter, please sc...

5 Ways Narcissists Manipulate Children - Episode 347 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Narcissists have a long list of ways they manipulate children. In this episode, I'll discuss 5 of the most common ones and give you tips on how you can counter these manipulative techniques in an effort to protect your children and your own sanity. To learn more about how I can support you in achieving s...

Can ChatGPT Solve Your Child Custody Issues? - Episode 346 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. ChatGPT can be a great tool and many of my clients rely on it for everything from communication with their ex, to organizing the large volume of documentation and even preparing court documents. I've also had many clients, after extensive use of ChatGPT, start to realize the things that it doesn't...

Keys to Success with a GAL (Guardian Ad Litem) - Episode 345 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In this episode, I'm going to giving keys to succeeding in your interactions with your children's attorney. Different states have different names for this, it's most frequently called a GAL, which stand for Guardian Ad Litem, a BIA, which stands for Best Interest Attorney, or Minor's Counsel. But...

Surviving Custody with a Narcissist - Episode 344 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Surviving Custody with a narcissist or any other high conflict personality without losing your sanity is all about developing the right strategies. For examples, the more conflict, the more specific you need to be in your interactions and your court orders. In this episode, I'm going to give you six strateg...

2 Types of Family Law Attorneys - Episode 343 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Most Family Law Attorneys have one of two approaches to how they handle cases. One of these approach makes you feel better emotionally and usually makes clients feel really seen and advocated for but it's not necessarily the "winning approach" for your case. To learn more about how I can support you in achievin...

#Coldplaygate - Episode 342 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. A recent social media post from a Coldplay concert went viral. It was a video of a couple who were having an affair and attended the concert together, only to end up on the "kisscam". Ironically, their reactions to being on the screen gave away their secret. Affairs are painful and devastating for everyone involved but many less...

Destroying Your Ex Does Not Win Your Case - Episode 341 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Family Court hearings are typically full of all kinds of mudslinging in both directions. Since we are in an adversary system and most people experience the law as "guilty vs innocent", this may seem like a logical approach. But a Family Law Judge doesn't think in terms of "guilty vs innocent" so tryin...

Core Foundations in Child Custody - Episode 340 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. There are core foundations in child custody that apply in almost every case. These principles will give you more success in your case, regardless of your situation and regardless of where you are at in the timeline of your case. Even if you've done these things poorly in the past, you can turn your case aroun...

Retaliation in Child Custody Court - Episode 339 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. When Narcissists win in Court, they often become emboldened and when they lose, they want a rematch. Often, that means retaliation against you that results in constant court hearings and chaos. Does the Court even care about retaliatory motives? Listen now to find out. To learn more about how I can support y...

In Episode 338 "Were You the One Doing Everything?" we will discuss how I often hear clients say they "did everything" in their relationship. What you may not realize is that doing everything is a trauma response. People who "do everything" also frequently over-commit , struggle to delegate, mistrust others, are perfectionists, and are reluctant to ask for help. Hyper-independence is a way of avoi...

What You Say V. How You Say It (In Court) – Episode 337 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Most people get very focused on the "what" part of the information they want the court to know. Much of my work as a coach is teaching people "how" to say the things they need to in a way that will resonate with the court. I'm going to give you 5 examples of what vs. how and then share 5 key principle...

Trauma Bond with a Narcissist – Episode 336 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Trauma bonds are created through a biochemical reaction in your body similar to addiction. So, it's no wonder we have trouble breaking free, long after the relationship has ended. We often continue on the emotional rollercoaster that is a relationship with a narcissist. How do you know if you have a trauma bond a...

5 Common Legal Traps with a Narcissist – Episode 335 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In this episode, I'll discuss five of the most common traps we see narcissists use to try to gain the upper hand in Court. Understanding how the narcissists weaponize these traps and what steps you can take to prevent them is crucial to your success against them in your child custody case. To learn more...

Exposing the Narcissist's Abuse – Episode 334 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Parents are often concerned about being able to expose narcissistic abuse from the other parent. In this episode, I'll share tips to help you gather the information you need to help you expose the behaviors. I'll also talk about how to present the information in a child-focused way that succeeds and not in a na...

Self Love is Key to Ending Toxic Relationships– Episode 333 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. The toxic patterns of a narcissist-codependent relationship don't magically end just because the relationship ends, especially if we have to co-parent with the narcissist. The same unhealthy dynamics continue t until we do the internal work that is required to develop self-love and break our unhea...

Presenting Your Child Custody Case – Episode 332 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Whether presenting your case to the court or another expert, one of the big mistakes people make is they talk about their case using words that are open to interpretation or by using feeling words such as angry, upset, etc. There is a very simple technique you can use to present your case in a way that will...

Coercive Control by Narcissists   – Episode 331 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Coercive control is  an act or a pattern of acts of assault, threats, humiliation and intimidation or other abuse that is used to harm, punish, or frighten their victim . Several s tates have recognized coercive control as a form of domestic violence. Narcissists use coercive control to interfere with the fre...

Narcissists Want a Rematch   – Episode 330 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. So, you finally made it through your court process and have your orders. Now, you'll have some peace, right? If you're dealing with a narcissistic or high-conflict person, that's not the likely scenario. They frequently want to appeal or want a rematch at the next possible date, which means court over and over aga...

Court-Ordered Custody Mediation Against a Narcissist   – Episode 329 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Mediation is required in most states prior to going to court on custody issues. But, mediation can look very different depending on where you are located. In this episode, I'll break down the different types of mediation to help you know what to expect and then I'll share some basic succe...

Narcissists Jumble Your Brain   – Episode 328 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Being clear headed to make good decisions is critical in child custody cases, especially in the early stages. Ironically, this is when most people experience the most brain fog and emotional disruption due to the breakdown of the relationship. In this episode, I'll share tips to help you "unjumble" your brain a...

When Life Gives You Lemons   – Episode 327 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. We all know the phrase When Life Gives You Lemons……….Make Lemonade. But when you lose your primary relationship, are away from your kids, are financially destroyed, or just stuck in a pit of grief it can feel nearly impossible to pull yourself out of that hole. In this episode, I'll share some short-term and some...

Parenting Plan Blueprint   – Episode 326 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. If you have a narcissistic or high-conflict co-parent then the components of your parenting plan and the level of detail becomes critical. In this episode, I'll break down the major components of a parenting plan and share some of the details that are most commonly added in high-conflict cases. To learn more about h...

Navigating a Broken Court System   – Episode 325 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Many parents feel like our Court system is broken. The system is definitely overloaded and is run by humans, so it doesn't always get things right. In this episode, I'll talk about the weaknesses in the system, why they exist, and how best to navigate them. To learn more about how I can support you in achiev...

5 Types of Court Hearings in Child Custody   – Episode 324 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In this episode, I'll talk about some of the common court hearings we see in child custody cases. Different hearings have different agendas, sometimes there is live testimony, sometimes not and sometimes it's just to "check in" with the court about various parts of the process. Understanding these...