Divorce University Online

What to Say in Court – Episode 224 of Divorce University Online Podcast. Public speaking is a fear that people often rank higher than death itself. When you have to do it in Court, in front of a Judge, your ex, their attorney, and the subject is your life, well, fear almost doesn't come close to describing it. Aside from the fear of public speaking you also have to figure out what to say, what not...

Creating Your Game Plan - Episode 223 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Any time you're dealing with complex situations, you need a game plan to be successful. It's always good to be flexible and to be able to adapt to changing situations but if you don't know what the end goal is or how to get there, then your leaving things to chance. Divorce and child custody issues are too important to...

Are You Waiting for Permission? - Episode 222 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Often, when you've been in a controlling and manipulative relationship, you develop a pattern of feeling like you need permission for everything you do. You can learn to tap into your authentic self and live the life you desire but it requires doing something different. You must face your fear and create the in...

Out of the Mouth of Babes - In this BONUS Episode, we decided to give you a more personal look at divorce from the viewpoint of children, specifically our own. We have invited our four boys to join us in studio this week to share their experiences of our divorces. Tammy's two sons, Dalton, age 29, Kevin, age 24 and Thomas' two sons, Isaiah, age 16 and Isaac, age 15 talk about the impact our divorc...

Is Your Ex Stealing Your Happiness? - Episode 221 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. During divorce, it's easy to blame your ex for everything that is happening. And, while many things may be their fault, focusing on those things only makes you more unhappy. Why is that? And more importantly, are there solutions? Join us to find out. For more information, please visit us at www.divorceunive...

Is It Time to Change Course in Your Custody Case? - Episode 220 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results. Yet, we often see people make this mistake in their Court case. If you aren't getting the results you want, maybe it's time to change course. But, you don't want to change course randomly, you need to...

Understanding the Motion/Request for Order Process - Episode 219 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In this episode, we talk through the court process for motions, also known as a Request for Order (RFO). We'll cover the logistical aspect of filing the motion, how to determine your arguments, writing your declaration, and speaking in Court. This comprehensive overview will give you a basic...

Are You a Perfectionist in Your Child Custody Case? – Episode 218 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Most parents want what is best for their children, although we have different ideas about what is best. Many times in our quest for the perfect outcome for our children, we lose sight of the reality of our situation. We frequently fail to explore acceptable alternatives and to see the positi...

Knowledge vs. Wisdom in Child Custody – Episode 217 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Attorneys obviously have lots of knowledge of the law, however, that doesn't necessarily mean they have wisdom. And most people going through a divorce, don't have the wisdom they would normally have about situations because of the extreme emotions experienced during divorce and child custody issues. It's...

Disciplining Your Child Won't Hurt Your Custody Case – Episode 216 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Parents frequently ask us about discipline techniques and how they should or should not discipline their children during custody cases. We all secretly want our children to like us better than the other parent and we're afraid the child will prefer the more permissive parent. Some of these...

Standing Your Ground in Child Custody Cases – Episode 215 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Often in child custody cases, we see one parent who is sick and tired of the other parent's crap! Can you relate? But being overly inflexible can also increase conflict and cause you to look uncooperative to the Court. So, the secret is to strike a balance between being kind and cooperative while al...

Start Creating – Episode 214 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Last week, we focused on how to stop negative thoughts. However, once you've accomplished stopping the negative thoughts, how do you move forward into creating the life you want? How do you make a permanent shift in your mindset that allows you to build a post-divorce life that you love? What strategies will increase your chang...

Stop Imagining – Episode 213 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Are you constantly worried about "what if"? What if I lose custody? What if the Court gets it wrong? What if I don't have enough money to cover my bills? Many divorcing people are plagued by "what if" simply because divorce is such an unknown for most people. And the unknown creates uncertainty and fear. In this episode, we tal...

Everybody Hates Me – Episode 212 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Many times people are in a terrible state of mind in the beginning of their divorce or child custody case. That can lead to some equally terrible behavior. If you make this mistake, it can start to feel like everybody hates you, from your ex, to your kids, to the Judge. But do they really or are you just caught in a case wi...

Every Problem Has a Solution – Episode 211 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In divorce or child custody issues, much of the discussion centers on who is to blame for various problems. To solve problems, we need solutions, not blame. In this episode we talk about how to reframe your thinking into focusing on the problem. By doing this, you can find a solution to most any problem you face....

Marital Hatred – Episode 210 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In this episode, we discuss the concept of "Marital Hatred", a term coined by a therapist named Terrence Real. According to Real, there is a certain amount of hatred for your spouse that is normal in a marriage. But as many of us have experienced, that hatred can hit a tipping point that ultimately leads to divorce. Then you're...

The Divorce Storm – Episode 209 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. We weather many "storms" in our life. Sometimes they are physical storms such as natural disasters and sometimes they are emotional storms. In this episode, we draw some parallels between the two and discuss the critical need to make the right decision at various stages. Decisions that, in a natural disaster, can mean life o...

Men vs. Women – Episode 208 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. As men and women, we come at life from very different perspectives. As we work with divorcing couples, we see recurring parents of conflict that comes during the relationship, at the point of breakup, and especially after the split. And yet, the Court expects us to set aside our feelings and "act like adults", which means get al...

The Humbling Experience of Raising Children – Episode 207 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. When we're new to parenting we have a vision of the future with our children. But what happens when your vision meets your reality, and they look nothing alike. No one signs up to be a parent half the time. When you are dealing with child custody issues, reality can become further and further from y...

Nothing Succeeds Like Success – Episode 206 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. A big part of success is momentum. But how do you gain momentum when it feels like life is only handing you lemons?  Of course, you make lemonade. Join us as we discuss "making lemonade" even in the midst of trials like divorce. For more information, please visit us at www.divorceuniversityonline.com . Thanks for...

Who Can Do It? Anyone – Episode 205 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. When you see other people succeeding, whether in family life, career, or a hobby, it's easy to think about how lucky that person must be. What we don't see is all the time, effort and energy that went into their accomplishment for days, months, or even years. The good news is, if you have a dream, you can accomplish even...

My Child Hates Me – Episode 204 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. When you're struggling to maintain a relationship with your child in a co-parenting situation, it's easy to start claiming parental alienation. But, family systems are much more complex than simply blaming one parent. If you're alienated or being accused of alienation, this episode will give you insight into the possible rea...

Happiness Makes You a Better Parent – Episode 203 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Happy parents are better parents. Happy parents produce happy children. You owe it to yourself and your children to intentionally cultivate happiness regardless of your present circumstances. So, how can you be happy despite the inherent negativity of divorce and child custody issues? For more information,...

Your Hidden Power – Episode 202 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Your hidden power is something available to everyone and it can be a huge help, not only during divorce but in any life crisis you are experiencing. Listen now as we explore your hidden power and give examples of how you can use it to your advantage. For more information, please visit us at www.divorceuniversityonline.com ....

Why Your Children MUST Be in Therapy – Episode 201 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Therapy is something we always suggest to divorcing parents for their children. Today, we discuss therapy in the context of the emotional strain on children of transitions and the emotional damage that's done when one parenting isn't meeting the needs of the child. And, why the Court is often ill-equipped...