Divorce Dialogues

Many fathers walk into the divorce process feeling disempowered. And while it is true that the judicial system has historically been biased toward mothers, things are evolving. So, what can men do to advocate for their rights in divorce and avoid losing custody of their children? Carrie Schultz is the Founder of MR. Men’s Rights Divorce & Family Law of New Jersey by Schultz & Associates. A...

Even if you craft the perfect divorce agreement, disputes still arise post-divorce. As circumstances change, conflicts come up. So, what should you do when you and your ex disagree? How might you leverage mediation to resolve those conflicts with less frustration and resentment? Erik Wheeler is the Founder and Family Mediator at Accord Mediation, a practice out of Burlington, Vermont, that special...

Anxiety around money puts a strain on any relationship. But for blended families, there’s an added layer of complexity. Who will pay for what? And where is the money coming from? The good news is, remarried couples can alleviate a lot of that stress with a little planning. Jay Mota is a Certified Financial Planner and Chartered Financial Consultant with Prudential Financial. Born and raised in the...

Family formation through gestational surrogacy can be a beautiful thing. It is also a lengthy, expensive process that comes with mental and emotional challenges. So, what do potential surrogates and intended parents, or IPs, need to know before they move forward? And how are both parties protected so that the surrogate-IP relationship thrives throughout the process? Alexis Cirel serves as partner...

How do you talk to your partner about money? How about your kids? Many of us are afraid to discuss our finances, so we avoid the subject altogether. But what if you had a new way to initiate the money conversation with your family? Judith Stern Peck is the Director of the Money and Family Life Project at the Ackerman Institute for the Family, where she serves as Senior Faculty. She has 40 years of...

A marriage is more than a romantic alliance. In the eyes of the law, saying I do makes you part of a financial partnership and social unit. And that has implications for EVERY couple, not just the rich and famous. So, what makes a prenuptial agreement a good idea? Is there a way to initiate the discussion without offending your husband- or wife-to-be? Soumya Evans is a family lawyer, trained media...

Dating after divorce is intimidating, especially for those of us who never dreamed we’d be looking for love online. So, how do you know when you’re ready to get back into the dating scene? How do you choose the right app? And how do you build a profile that reflects the best version of you? Alyssa Dineen is the dating coach and personal stylist behind Style My Profile, a consulting agency that hel...

As society evolves, the landscape of what a family looks like and who can be parents is changing, too. More and more single people, same-sex couples, transgender individuals and people with medical issues are building families by way of surrogacy or adoption. So, what do those of us who are considering surrogacy need to think about before we start the process? Lisa Schuman is the licensed clinical...

For couples who can’t carry their own child, surrogacy is a viable option. And yet, the law in many states recognizes the surrogate as the legal mother and forces intended parents to work through the adoption process. So, how does surrogacy work? And how is the legislation changing in New York? Yifat Shaltiel is the Founder and Attorney-Director of Surrogate Steps, an agency that helps individuals...

EP: 143 Jackie Pilossoph Working Through the 10 Emotional Stages of Divorce Divorce is an emotional roller coaster. You might feel shock, fear, hope, sadness, gratitude and anger—and that’s just in one afternoon. So, what can you expect to feel as you move through the divorce process? And how can you work through those emotional stages with as much grace and dignity as possible? Jackie Pilossoph i...

Though it’s been proven that girls are just as good at math as boys, the cultural assumption that men are better at managing money persists. And in the divorce process, many women (even the smart, capable ones) struggle with financial decisions. So, what are the systemic myths that keep women from having a good relationship with money? And what can we do to change that? Financial Therapist Carrie...

When our children are growing up, we cover the electrical outlets. We make sure they wear bike helmets and drink organic milk. We go out of our way to ensure that they are safe and healthy and happy. And yet, many parents fail to protect their kids from the toxicity of a high-conflict divorce. So, what can we do to set aside our feelings for our ex and make things better for our children? Sarah Ar...

The COVID pandemic has put extra pressure on even the healthiest marriages. And for couples who were already struggling, sheltering in place together has exacerbated our issues. But how do you know if it’s bad enough to call it quits? Kira Gould is a Certified Divorce Coach and Real Estate Divorce Specialist dedicated to transforming the divorce process from an adversarial knock-down-drag-out to a...

A lot of people stay in unhappy marriages because they don’t think they can afford not to. But if you’re willing to take a close look at your finances and enlist the help of the right professionals, you can come to a peaceful resolution and navigate a divorce settlement that ensures your financial security for the long term. Stacy Francis is the Founder and CEO of Francis Financial, a fee-only, bo...

Though most divorcing couples intend to put the best interests of their children first, their own emotions get in the way. So, how can divorced parents learn to prioritize their children’s needs and create a trusting and constructive coparenting relationship? How can they help their kids build resilience in the aftermath of divorce? Risa Garon is the Cofounder and Executive Director of the Nationa...

Divorce is stressful. But there are things we can do to mitigate that stress and avoid the conflict that comes when our emotions get the best of us. In fact, implementing just one or two simple mindfulness techniques can go a long way in helping us get out of our heads and re-center—without having to master Lotus Pose. Dr. Crystal Dea Moore is a Professor of Social Work at Skidmore College and the...

It’s hard enough to understand what Social Security benefits you may be entitled to as a married person, but once you’re divorced… Well, it’s complicated. Can you claim spousal benefits on an ex-spouse? What happens if your ex remarries? Or passes away? James McGlynn is the CEO at Next Quarter Century, a retirement planning firm out of Fort Worth, Texas. He spent 35 years serving clients as a mutu...

While the overall divorce rate in the US has declined, gray divorce is on the rise. In fact, among adults over 50, the divorce rate has doubled in the last 30 years! Why are older Americans divorcing at such a dramatic rate? And what does it mean for their finances? Lisa Decker is a nationally recognized expert in the financial matters of divorce. A Certified Divorce Financial Analyst and Real Est...

EP: 134 Whitney Boole To Heal from Divorce, Move Through Your Grief Do you feel stuck in the pain of divorce? Are you having a hard time moving on? Like any other loss, divorce triggers the grief process. And you have to move through the stages of grief if you want to heal. Whitney Boole is the licensed marriage and family therapist behind Beach Cities Psychotherapy, a private practice based in He...

For victims of domestic violence, the actual separation from an abusive spouse is a dangerous time. What resources are available to help survivors plan a safe exit? What can we do to protect ourselves and our kids from further harm? And what legal protections exist to support those of us who are divorcing an abusive spouse? Board Certified Family Law Specialist Lisa Angel is the President of Rosen...

Most divorcing couples are good at the blame game. They cast their former partner as the villain and spend a lot of time stewing in bitterness and anger. But if that kind of ongoing adversarial relationship is not what you want for your kids, there is a way to clean up the wreckage of the past and build something new. There is a way to have a happy divorce. Nikki DeBartolo and Benjamin Heldfond ar...

Substance abuse adds another layer of complexity to the divorce process. So, what do you need to consider if you’re divorcing an addict? And what if you’re struggling with alcoholism or drug abuse yourself? Attorney Aaron Thomas is the Founder of Aaron Thomas Law, a family law practice based in Atlanta, Georgia. Aaron began his legal career in 2002 as an in-house staff attorney for Habitat for Hum...

If you’ve been blindsided by an unwanted divorce, the prospect of feeling joy again one day may seem impossible. But if you’re willing to do the work, you CAN choose better over bitter and take the first steps on the path to happily divorced. India Kern is the Divorce Recovery Mentor behind India Kern Coaching, a practice dedicated to guiding clients through the transition from married to happily...

If you’re in the middle of a divorce, meal planning is probably at the bottom of your priority list. But the fact is, what you eat (or don’t eat) has a serious impact on the way you feel—and the way you feel about yourself. So, what can you do to maintain good nutrition through such a stressful time? Kristin Kirkpatrick is the award-winning dietician and nutritionist behind KAK Consulting and mana...

How do you know if your marriage is over? And once you know, how do you overcome the fears associated with divorce? Debra Doak is a Certified Divorce Coach and Certified Divorce Financial Analyst on a mission to give women the confidence they need to speak up for what they deserve in their relationships or at the negotiating table. Debra specializes in helping women make difficult decisions about...