Divorce Dialogues

Separated parents often worry about the upheaval a divorce causes in their kids’ lives, especially the stress that comes with moving back and forth between two households. But what if you could give your children the security of staying in the family home? Nesting allows kids to do just that. And it’s the parents who move in and out. So, how does nesting work? Is it right for your family? Beth Beh...

At the beginning of a new romance, we’re not worried about repeating the unhealthy patterns that ended our previous relationships. We tell ourselves that this one is different. But statistics tell a different story. The divorce rate is 41% for first marriages, 60% for second marriages and 73% the third time around. So, what’s behind those dismal statistics? And what can we do to heal a disappointi...

Many people are overburdened with expenses after divorce. So, what options do you have when the cost of living on your own becomes overwhelming and you get into financial trouble? Though it is a last resort, sometimes filing for bankruptcy is the best way to eliminate some of your debt and get back on your feet. So, how do divorce and bankruptcy law work together? What do you need to know about de...

If you’re going through a divorce, you’ve likely fallen into what David Emerald Womeldorff calls the Dreaded Drama Triangle or DDT. But this framework keeps you and your ex focused on your problems rather than the outcomes you want. So, what is the antidote to the toxicity of DDT? How do you shift out of fear and reactivity into creativity and empowerment? David is the Creator-in-Chief of The Empo...

Divorce leaves us overwhelmed and vulnerable, compromising our ability to parent well. And despite our best intentions, we may inadvertently dismiss our kids’ feelings or put them in an uncomfortable position. So, what can we do to gain a better understanding of what our children are going through during a divorce? How can we learn to coparent in a way that puts kids first? Christina McGhee is the...

When you’re going through a divorce, it’s easy to lose your joy. You feel like you have every right to be down in the dumps. This was certainly true for Connie Monroe, who threw herself a pity party with wine and cigarettes every night after work during her divorce. But when she found out that her cousin had been diagnosed with cancer and the prognosis was not good, Connie had an AHA moment. She r...

Divorce means accepting that things didn’t go as planned and adjusting to major changes in your life. It’s about taking on challenges you’re not prepared for at a time when your confidence is shot. When Eykiena ‘Keena’ Crowley got divorced, she struggled with all of these issues too. But her background as a combat veteran in the US Army meant that she had practice adjusting to unanticipated change...

Most of us are familiar with the five stages of grief—denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. But what if your experience doesn’t follow this linear pattern? Whether you’re grieving the loss of a loved one or navigating a divorce, you need tools to move through the trauma of loss and get to life on the other side. Krista St. Germain is a Master Certified Life Coach, post-traumatic gr...

Most people think of narcissists as obnoxious and self-absorbed. They’re flashy, loud and charismatic. And it’s obvious that they’re looking out for #1. But a covert narcissist is much harder to identify. They are generally well-liked and well-respected by others. And the way they manipulate their partner is much more subtle and difficult to recognize. So, how do you know if you’re in a relationsh...

After 10 years of working in the divorce business, Judith Weigle reflected on the couples who were able to communicate well and navigate the process with less stress. And she identified the elements of what she calls a Heart-Healthy Divorce. So, what steps can you take to make your divorce more amicable and less acrimonious? Judith is Founder of Divorce Resource, Inc., a firm that provides both me...

Communication breakdown in a marriage often leads to divorce. But the way your partner triggers your nervous system often has nothing to do with them and everything to do with trauma you’ve experienced in the past. So, what if you could change the way your mind accesses that trauma and stay present with your partner in those moments? Dr. Don Wood, PhD, is CEO of the Inspired Performance Institute...

Matthew Fray considered himself a good guy. He didn’t lie. He didn’t cheat. He wasn’t violent. But his wife didn’t trust him, and the marriage ended in 2013. What subtle cues did Matthew miss? What led his ex to believe she couldn’t count on him? Today, Matthew is a relationship coach and writer who leans on the lessons of his failed marriage to help others avoid making the same mistakes he did. H...

In 2013, Ellen Bruno released the documentary Split: Divorce Through Kids’ Eyes. In the film, 12 kids aged six to 12 share their experience of their parents’ divorce. Ten years later, Ellen sat down with the same 12 kids for a sequel, Split UP: The TEEN Years. What did she learn about how to best support children through the process of divorce? Ellen is an award-winning filmmaker with a background...

Most women realize that the right team can help us move through the divorce process more quickly and easily. But what if you’ve already got a therapist and supportive friends and family—and you still feel stuck? Wendy Sterling is a top divorce recovery coach and healer, life transition specialist and creator of The Divorce Rehab program. She also serves as host of The Divorced Woman’s Guide podcas...

Do you have a hard time saying NO for fear of letting people down? Do you say YES out of obligation and then resent being coerced into something you didn’t really want to do? To make relationships work, it’s important to set clear boundaries. But first, you’ve got to take the time to figure out what you want. Leanne Kanzler is a psychologist and breakup coach who helps clients get to where they de...

If your identity is wrapped up in being a wife, a mother and a corporate executive, what happens if you lose your job? Or your kids leave the nest? Or you get a divorce? In the year leading up to her 50th birthday, all three of those things happened to Jennifer Arthurton at once. And the future seemed like a big black hole. But then Jennifer realized she had much wisdom and experience to share, an...

When it comes to money management, many married women either defer to their partners or work out a financial division of labor. But the paradigm shifts if you’re getting a divorce. And you may be insecure in your ability to manage money on your own for the first time. So, how do you overcome the confidence gap and build a successful financial life for yourself post-divorce? Harvard Business School...

So, you’d like to take the high road in your divorce, but you’re afraid you’ll get screwed in the process. If you ask Andy Heller, that is a flawed way to look at things. In fact, he contends that there’s a positive correlation between conflict and cost in divorce. And you can save money and protect your health and wellbeing by letting some things go and incorporating empathy into actions that aff...

Divorce is scary, especially if you're not confident in your ability to manage money independently. But what if the end of your marriage is not the financial Armageddon you fear? What if it's actually an opportunity to take control of your financial future? David Stolz is a certified public accountant, personal financial specialist and certified divorce financial analyst. David has more than 20 ye...

If you’re in the process of getting a divorce, you’ve probably had enough with lawyers. So, why should you consider hiring yet another attorney? Because if you fail to enlist the help of a lawyer who specializes in estate planning and asset protection, your ex-spouse will have the power to make important decisions about your life. Decisions you no longer trust them to make. Asset Protection Advoca...

It’s easy to blame your exes for failed relationships. And believe that if you could just FIND the right partner, then you’d have lasting love. But what if you need to BE the right partner in order to build a great relationship? Roy Biancalana is a certified relationship coach and a nationally recognized expert in the field of attraction and conscious relationships. For the last 15 years, Roy has...

Assisted reproductive technology has dramatically changed the concept of family. And it wasn’t until the Child-Parent Security Act (CPSA) went into effect that the law in New York finally caught up with how children are being conceived. But what happens if the parents of a child conceived with assisted reproduction get divorced? Denise Seidelman is Cofounder of Rumbold and Seidelman, a firm specia...

Divorce makes most people feel isolated and alone. But what if you had a friend going through the process at the same time? Someone to lean on for support and share your experiences? Jessica Klingbaum and T.H. Irwin went through a divorce at the same time, and that shared experience inspired the two friends to found exEXPERTS, a vetted online resource and community for women navigating divorce. Pr...

Divorce can often be the impetus for changing the way we parent into a new child-centered approach. Dr. Julie Verner is a clinical psychologist specializing in parenting and family life, including divorce and family transitions. As a married mother of four, she brings compassion and understanding to her professional work and a passion for raising and loving the little people in our lives. Besides...

How do you learn to share your children with someone you no longer love, trust, or get along with? And how do you handle other people's expectations of you and your situation in divorce? Michelle Dempsey-Multack is a genuine girl power enthusiast. She's also a divorced, remarried mom & stepmom who is co-parenting with her daughter's father. The host of the popular Mom's Moving On podcast, Mich...