Disgorgeous

 Alternately, we could call this real ass biaxas. We make a lot of puns with our good friend and best winemaker in California Ian Brand. Honestly, Ian brings out some weird energy. Everyone is mean to Kevin, and maybe its NOT OKAY, but he gets the last laugh by talking about dead white boy bands a bunch. Duck’s mangled brain creates a new character, a Frenchman who likes to drink pee. There’s a lo...

Take off your baby wheels and open that sugar mouth wide cuz it’s time to party with the legendary Joe Swick. As per his insistence, we get absolutely lit on Baga, which Duck keeps comparing to Nebbiolo to hide his ignorance of the proud Portuguese wine tradition.  This is our first foray into Portuguese wine and wow is there a lot more to investigate. Also, we drink grown up wine and have tannins...

  The boys are joined by tiny-wine list impresario and 1/2 of the upcoming @pinoynoirpodcast Miguel de Leon, the original bad boy of wine, to discuss Sauvignon Blanc from the Loire valley and to get extremely tilted on white wine. The boys revisit an old friend, re-affirm their faith in god, and get rowdy for pangolins, all the while veering dangerously close to being canceled on their birthday. S...

 A nice muscadate is spoiled by our first important corked bottle. Duck shouldn’t be alone right now, to be honest. The tires really come off, but at least there is our first tandem song (and it rules).  Although this episode really veers towards classic podcast notes of two bored white dudes talking about nothing, but it also serves as your official warning about the month of May, which we’ve dec...

  Global correspondent Kevin returns with an exciting new goutwatch from a week in “France,” and the boys drink a care package from the wonderful @pariswineco, whose wine you should probably drink, to be honest. Duck accidentally slanders the Lore and delivers a nearly incomprehensible lecture about why he doesn’t like Cab Franc, but makes up for it by straight up reading from a endangered turtle...

The reign of dankosity ends as the boys turn their coats, doff their caps (hello m'lady) and rail fat lines of sulfites. To further overextract the fun, they are joined by natural wine partisan, writer and party planner Alexis Schwartz of Thirsty, Thirsty.  This is a really reasonable smart person episode, full of Proustian memories and duck muttering about Pre-Islamic monotheists in the Arab...

Our boys desires are… unconventional. Enter our hothouse and get ready to do some zinning here on birdsarentrealdotcomslashpodcast. Zeriously, this is probably the first time the boys had any tannins this season, and whooooo boy do they love it. Get ready to put your puffy vests on and chomp a big ol’ cigar. Don’t worry though, Kevin unironically describes both as “SoyBoy” wines, so looks like the...

 Guess which boys forgot to dine before they podded? We bet no one can tell! Recorded in the first week of our lord and savior Big Changus, the boys really get into a “Spanish set of mind” and accidentally “Defend facism” and “spend 45 minutes talking about Moby Dick.” Also, Xarel-lo, which, as everyone knows, is the best white from Catalonia (sorry Salvador Dali #tryharder2019). Hope you guys thi...

  The boys are joined by Bon Appetit’s Emily Schultz and looking for sponsors in all the wrong places, as the trio gets down and dirty with the phenomenon of instagram wine.  Kevin and Duck are in way over their heads on this, so luckily Emily actually understands analytics and being a millennial. Honestly, the episode is really foot-pic centric, which none of us expected going into it, but it’s w...

The boys drink Sylvaner and become deranged as a way to celebrate #soberJanuary. They say a bunch of stuff they probably don’t mean so you can hold them responsible for their actions. Don’t follow their advice tbh. Welcome to season 3. Kevin has DTs and new characters, Duck has depression and freakum jeans. Both have terrible opinions and an hour to kill and apparently, literally zero shame. Let’s...

  The boys end season 2 of their critically acclaimed podcast drinking champagne and trying to sound smart.  Notable as an episode because it’s possibly almost educational, you’re welcome. The boys discuss the British, French history and the power of chalk. Since we cut out all insane and or litigious stuff, this episode might be suitable for public consumption, so play it on full volume at your o...

The boys are joined by Alex from Subject to Change Wine Co. to discuss NAFTA, which everyone really fully understands. Duck is clearly having a day and is basically foaming at the mouth the whole episode — get ready for some rambling discussions about the cops, dads, and towards the end, the total number of free dog parts per liter of wine. Kevin wants to fuck the Grinch, and we maybe don’t live i...

 The boys are back with another orange wine episode, and this time it’s cannon. They’re joined by eldritch memelord Sam Lindeman, aka ASAP Mousey AKA GlouGloueyedMender AKA WokeWineMemes in an episode sure to infuriate our remaining 3 non-millennial fans. Get ready for a discussion on Joanna Newsome, Orange Wine, and proustian memories that is literally 10000000 times more earnest than Duck was ex...

The boys are joined by disgorgeous super fan and Australian wine expert, Leah Rinaldi in a doomed attempt to change Duck's broken brain. Discussions get really thirsty, to be honest -- get ready to hear a lot about Sexy Santa and winemaker Jordy Kay's cheekbones. Also, and this is real, can someone start uploading episodes on Pornhub? We'd do it ourselves but we don't know what...

The boys interview Emily Elyse Miller, the most important person in the breakfast world, creator of Breakfast club and Duck’s favorite walking tour he’s ever done. Expect definitive answers to the bagel vs. bialy controversy, what kind of jams everyone enjoys, and what ancient Egyptians had in the morning. Don’t worry, somewhere in here is a passionate discussion about that one wine article that m...

Welcome to the shirt cave. Seriously, don’t be afraid to @ Kevin and ask him about the shirts. Classic episode, wine positive, sex negative, loose theme. Basically, the boys wanted to drink these wines and make some comedy magic. Lots of the stuff you’d like to hear about on a wine podcast like when Duck taught a wine and sex toy pairing at babeland, detective pikachu, and an extended discussion a...

Slurps ahoy! Here’s the second half of Zach’s episode. Everyone’s drunk and tasting some unreleased wine. Duck is on the floor for the entire time, Zach never stopped drinking Moscato, and Kevin broke his computer in a long-awaited wine spilling accident. More freewheeling, but basically an hour of an actual interview, so that’s pretty cool. This is an incredible way to gain insight into one of th...

Truly our finegan’s wake episode in the sense that it can only be understood if you’re a genius. The boys are joined by nemesis Zach Klug of Litenbuffel and Leah Rinaldi to discuss the ancient muscat grape. There’s a lot of shouting and macho posturing, but to be honest, the ending is a close to a mission statement of Disgorgeous LTD LLC ESQUIRE ETC as you’re likely to ever get, which means it’s a...

The boys are joined by Jenny Eagleton, professional snack wizard and natural wine genius to discuss their first love, cider.  They tear through like 8 bottles and get real as hell. Lots of DTP and ASMR and STDs and duck reveals his raw wine beef.  Probably our most earnest and dweeby episode — go drink more cider. Tell your parents to donate to our patreon, patreon.com/disgorgeous Aaron Burr, Appi...

 The boys do the same thing they always do but this time there’s an audience. It’s a little loosey goosey to be honest but everyone had fun. Duck gets heckled, Kevin breaks something. I know a lot of people don’t love live episodes but we are proud of this to be honest. There’s a lot of North African chatter because the hecklers looked at Duck too much. S/o to everyone who made this possible! Bill...

LINK: BUY TICKETS TO OUR OCTOBER 29 LIVE SHOW (TONIGHT!) HOT OFF THE PRESSES: Our website is up!!  and you can buy t-shirts The boys really lean into their best strength: blind tasting booze. Duck has a cold and is champagne drunk, Kevin is hung over. Lots of discussion about energy conservation. The boys realize how big of a sacrifice they’ve made scheduling their live show ( TINYURL.COM/DISGORGE...

LINK: BUY TICKETS TO OUR OCTOBER 29 LIVE SHOW HOT OFF THE PRESSES: Our website is up!!  and you can buy t-shirts The boys are joined by Keith Beavers, host of Wine Skool’d podcast to discuss Chianti. Keith knows a ton and you should listen to his podcast instead. The boys refuse to stop talking about Tuscan history through the lens of Assassin’s Creed 2. Duck develops a weird hearing disorder IRT...

HOT OFF THE PRESSES: Our website is up!!  and you can buy t-shirts LINK: BUY TICKETS TO OUR OCTOBER 29 LIVE SHOW It’s been a bad week in terms of like news for the people of Earth. The boys do a face mask, drink nice wine and do light drug use and try to avoid getting upset. Duck tries to explain fascism, Kevin embraces a new identity as the smart one, and we all learn to enjoy Italian wine togeth...

Sharp elbows, sharp minds, sharp tongues. The boys welcome James Sligh, the wine industry's kiss of death, to talk natural fabrics, chenin blanc and way too much Star Wars. We recorded this on one of the worst politics days in recent memory, so accidentally it does get dark but we're pretty sure we got rid off all the legally actionable stuff. A reminder that although we require tithes t...

The boys welcome Miguel de Leon from Pinch Chinese and Tama to discuss sexy Mario canon, Filipino food, cancelling Drake and Merlot. After the second bottle and a sneaky cab franc break, the boys solve the issue of representation in the restaurant industry and try to figure out what's going on in nasty Jancis Robinson's head. This is the episode that broke the camel’s back ya’ll — new mi...