Decommissioned with Rob Ellis, Rach & Wingman

Paul McCartney is a LEGEND! He hates AI but have you ever heard him fart? Decommissioned Celebrity - Is this week's a bit of a dick? You decide. Keep your voice notes coming on our Whatsapp! Yours could be on an episode soon. Another car that loads of you will have had has been DECOMMISSIONED!! What next? Wingman's first car was an old Hollands pie van. As always we finish the episode with a song...

The world is going to 'SHIT' if you don't laugh you'll cry!!! If a meteorite was about to wipe out earth how would you spend your last few hours? The podcast listener numbers went up last week sex definatly sells. Apparently it's what the people want! So Rachel asks AI to make a mucky story staring a man called Rob and a man called wingman. We have a quick update on The 'Decommissioned' official M...

The world is going to 'SHIT' if you don't laugh you'll cry!!! The cost of living is getting out of control and to make things worse shrinkflation is getting worse!! A heavy duty traffic cones almost decommissioned Rach's work Van. Decommissioned safari parks. Beware of the monkeys they have multiplied in a big way!!! To finish this week's episode we discuss monkey's arses. Would applying pile crea...

The world is going to 'SHIT' but we just laugh at it!!! Mucky podcasts are a huge success, some of them are making MILLIONS. So with the help of AI Wingman makes a Mucky story staring a man called Rob and a woman called Rachel. Their reaction is absolutely priceless!! This week's Decommissioned Celebrity was a bit of a nob on a train. Their identity has been hidden as always and replaced by anothe...

The world is going to 'SHIT' but we just laugh at it!! 🎙️ Click follow to never miss an episode. Follow us on socials: @decommissioneduk You can now send us a voice note on Whatsapp - 07346336743 save it in your phone as DECOMMISSIONED. We are open 24 hours a day! Subscribe to our YouTube: @decommissioneduk Email us now: contact@decommissioned.co.uk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more...

The world is going to 'SHIT' but we just laugh at it!!! We are splitting up!!!! The podcast we mean. It will now be in two parts. First part will drop every Tuesday and the second part will drop on a Thursday. Rob went to a backwards firework display. We are looking for a clap starter for our live event that we haven't organised yet. Old people care workers could be the next job to be Decommission...

Some people hate being alone! Rob looks forward to it! In the future YOU will never be alone as everyone will have an AI Companion. On this episode Rob has an awkward chat with one. Have you ever lost something in a box of Pumpkins in a supermarket? Are graphic designers the next job to be Decommissioned? Hannah has got in touch she thinks that she's still in the game. 'DECOMMISSIONED CELEBRITY' T...

Wingman does another podcast and it's all about Parenting. Its making miles more money that Decommissioned so Rob wants to give it a try to see if we can make some money!! The topics discussed are Did your parents ever hit you as a kid? Should your kid start working from 6 years of age? and Would you let a company name your kid if they paid you 10K a year? Did you know there's no Crab in a crab st...

BLOODY HELL can mean so many different things depending on the emotion when you say it! Have a listen and play along. Rob gets deep and it all starts with SHOWER THOUGHTS!! Producer Josh finds a dead pigeon on his balcony and finds a new fear. 'DECOMMISSIONED CELEBRITY' This week's Decommissioned Celebrity could be the best one so far!! Who do you think it is? Sounds like mucky phone lines are the...

We think we have found a way to make Sumo Wrestling miles more entertaining!! Rachel has been done for thieving. 'DECOMMISSIONED CELEBRITY' Find out which Celeb left their knickers in someone's bin. (Celebs identity hidden obviously) Who could this week's celeb be? Could Translators be next job to be Decommissioned? What could they do as an alternative? New 'Decommissioned' official Merchandise AV...

It's the anniversary of The Bag for Life. Lets celebrate!!!! Is there anything worse than when people leave a shit load of money to a family pet when they die? We discuss possible ways that you could try get the money back off a pet. The Cock N Balls tattoo correction gallary. If you were accidentally given a tattoo of a Cock N Balls by an AI tattoo machine how would you disguise the tattoo? What...

On the latest Decommissioned episode Rob thinks him and Wingman got spiked after last week's podcast recording. A guy in a pub round Wingman's end got pissed and started bragging to locals that he had a WW2 Bomb in his back garden. Turns out it was TRUE!! Bomb-baclart!! We discuss another celebrity that's been a complete dick with one of our Decommissioned listeners. (Celebs identity hidden obviou...

On the latest episode of Decommissioned we discuss another Decommissioned celebrity. (identity hidden) find out why Barbers could be the next profession to be decommissioned. Boddingtons bitter is back being brewed in Manchester and the mayor of Japan absolutely loves it!!! Wingman has messed up with the prices on Our official 'DECOMMISSIONED' merchandise crisp. It's costing the company a fortune!...

We wanted to pay our respects to Manchester Boxing Legend Ricky Hatton and share some of our memories over the years. Did you know there is a £5 note floating about the northwest of England that's worth £20,000 check your pockets!!! And Its official you can now call your boss a DICKHEAD and not get sacked. Our official 'DECOMMISSIONED' signed crisps are now available in 4 different flavours and th...

Quick question - Do you ever look and laugh at an animals bollocks? Rob has to put tape over his mouth at the start of the episode because one of the team has lost a family member. And we are going to do a LIVE stream for episode 21 you need to subscribe to our YouTube channel @decommissioneduk New 'Decommissioned' Merchandise AVAILABLE NOW!!! Visit decommissioned.co.uk You can now send us a voice...

Wingman has got really drunk and The Decommissioned podcast has been told to look for another studio. We read congratulation emails from listeners to Rachel. Rob gets stuck in traffic and has to 'Bear Grylls' it. Wingman has a dilemma with a injured builder We give an update on our merchandise. Chip pans are sill available. Unfortunately plenty left!! Visit decommissioned.co.uk NOW!! Send us a Wha...

Rachel has some MASSIVE news!!! Rob asks if 'Tune of the Summer' is still a thing And Wingman has sorted our first Decommissioned merchandise. Check out decommissioned.co.uk and be the first to buy our new branded deep fat frying pan. Send us a Whatsapp - 07346336743 save it in your phone as DECOMMISSIONED and send us a voice note about anything you hear on the podcast. We are open 24 hours a day!...

Rob goes to a funeral and Mr Bean is a priest. Rach joins us from her holiday in Cyprus don't tell the burglars. Get a pen and paper cause we think we've found the future of porn. And we've only gone and found CLINK CLINK he's come in with a hat on so let's see if he's still bald? Send us a Whatsapp - 07346336743 save it in your phone as DECOMMISSIONED and send us a voice note about anything open...

'Decommissioned' have let a monster in. They have invited their editor to actually tell them what he thinks for the podcast. What stays? What's gone forever? He doesn't want to be there. They soon won't!! Send us a Whatsapp - 07346336743 save it in your phone as DECOMMISSIONED and send us a voice note about anything open 24 hours a day!! 🎙️ Click follow to never miss an episode. Follow us on socia...

Rach has killed two fish, but it's Rob that's the psychopath!! Worrying times for the people of Wigan. Do you know what a Kum bang or a Tit-Bore is? Rob, Rach and Wingman have a good guess. Find out the latest applicant to try and rent our 'Decommissioned Bucket' And Wingman's nicked a tool box off a kid. Send us a Whatsapp - 07346336743 save it in your phone as DECOMMISSIONED and send us a voice...

How far can Peacocks fly? Who gets our 'Decommissioned Bucket' this week? A man goes to Turkey to get a hight reduction. Has Producer Clink Clink quit and stolen all Wingman's Tesco Clubcard points? And why is a washing-machine-minute not a minute? Send us a Whatsapp - 07346336743 save it in your phone as DECOMMISSIONED and send us a voice note about anything open 24 hours a day!! 🎙️ Click follow...

Who deserves a Golden Kangaroo and who defiantly needs to hand theirs back? Rachel thinks she's going grey or has her hairdresser planted it? find out what a euphoric tickle is. quite possibly the best tickle in the history of tickles!! And how much would you pay for seat 11A? Send us a Whatsapp - 07346336743 save it in your phone as DECOMMISSIONED and send us a voice note about anything open 24 h...

Wingman’s dad is the Willy Wonker of a soap factory. Find out if German’s Tut. Can an elephant take it’s alcohol? Does it become aggressive or a flirt? Page 3 is making a comeback with a twist. And this week Rach attempts to get a job at a Bingo Hall. Send us a Whatsapp - 07346336743 save it in your phone as DECOMMISSIONED and send us a voice note about anything open 24 hours a day!! Decommissione...

Oasis are in town. One member of Decomissioned went to watch them. One gave up his tickets to wear his slippers at home. Send us a Whatsapp - 07346336743 save it in your phone as DECOMMISSIONED and send us a voice note about anything open 24 hours a day!! 🎙️ Click follow to never miss an episode. Follow us on socials: @decommissioneduk Got something to say? contact@decommissioned.co.uk --- --- Dec...

Find out the real reason why Cats are terrified of Cucumbers!!! Listener Abigail tries to rent our 'Decommissioned Bucket' but is her reason good enough? Rachel has had her first trial taste of work since being sacked. It's never gonna last. And are we any closer to getting re-commissioned? follow @decommissioneduk on socials. Send us a Whatsapp - 07346336743 save it in your phone as DECOMMISSIONE...