Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship

Accepting that friends will hang out without you is a key to happier adult friendships. My best friend Taryn Kessel and I discuss that truth. We also talked about how to balance the desire for smaller, intimate friend gatherings with the desire to never leave anyone out. If you've ever been excluded, you know how terrible it feels. But as we get older, we need to figure out how to be gracious...

A mini-ep to understand why friends ask personal or even intrusive questions, which came up in episode 8 with my mom: “How to handle friends’ questions you don’t want to answer." In that episode, my mom and I talked about strategies for avoiding giving away information, but we didn’t try to understand where intrusive/personal/intimate questions come from in the first place. Today's episode...

The role of privacy in close friendships, the line between intimacy and privacy, the lines between white lies/ withholding information, and the right to keep some things to yourself. My guest is my mom, the queen of the artful dodge. We discuss how to manage these sometimes invasive (even when well-intentioned) conversations without hurting feelings or making things awkward. It’s not easy! ALL THE...

Sometimes we're waiting for apologies from friends and sometimes we owe apologies. Inspired by the Al Chet prayer we say in synagogue on Yom Kippur, I’m offering a version related only to friendship. And like we do for Yom Kippur, I’m using “we” not “I” because I’d like to think I’m not alone in my friendship transgressions. I know not everyone reading this follows the Jewish calendar, but it’...

Episode #7: Friendship breakups and repairing a broken friendship. One of my best friends, who was once an ex-friend, and I discussed whether it’s possible to truly forgive a friend who hurt you and whether you can restart a friendship that ended. We did it and we think others can, too. Forgiving someone doesn’t always mean staying friends or becoming friends again. I’m merely asking listeners to...

Unfollowing a friend on social media is not always the answer. This quick episode will help you decide between unfollowing, muting, hiding, unfriending, or blocking. A friend's posts are bugging you on social media? Unfriending is not always the answer.  ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO 📢  This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina 📱 Subscribe to my newsletter...

How much engagement can expect friends to have on your social media posts? Have you ever had a friend who presses "like" and comments on all of your mutual friends’ posts but ignores yours? You’d like to rise above it all, but you can’t help feeling hurt? Or, are you the person who scrolls through friends' posts, but can't bring yourself to "like" them? My guest, Rudri Pate...

Christie Tate, author of Group: How One Therapist And A Circle of Strangers Saved My Life , joined me to answer an anonymous question about mental health and how much to reveal to a new friend. Christie and I discussed if you have what some might consider "extra baggage," whether this is something you should tell a new friend right away. If not, when is the right time to share personal det...

Are you the friend who calls or texts first and reaches out for plans, or do you let your friends reach out first? In this episode my guest, Pam Moore, and I answer a letter from someone who is tired of making all the effort to get in touch or instigate plans. And as it turns out, some of the most popular internet searches leading to my website is the phrase, "My friend never initiates contact...

Episode #2: How do you manage adult friendships when the kids are fighting or are no longer friends. Can adult friendships survive after the kids’ friendships have ended? Even after your close friend's kid/tween/teen was nasty to your kid? We say yes, but it can be an artful dance of not getting on somebody else's emotional roller coaster.  And don’t forget to listen to the end of the show...

 If you have a friend who will only text, do you accept that fact if you’re more of a phone talker? What if you're the one who prefers to text, but your good friend insists on phone chats? Can a friendship last when the modes of communication are not agreed upon? My guest today is my mom, Kathy Sackheim, whose wise words I've quoted in my column for many years.  ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + C...

Dear Nina, Conversations About Friendship is a podcast for people who love discussing the ups and downs of friendship. I'm Nina Badzin , a writer who has been writing about friendship since 2014, when two editors of a friendship focused website offered me an advice column. I'm not a therapist. I'm not a social worker. I'm someone with a passion for friendship who offers a practical...