Dear Dr. Tracy

Resentment isn’t the hot kind of anger that flares and fades. It’s the quiet kind that builds in the background, often after you’ve asked for something over and over, and nothing changes. Dr. Tracy reframes resentment as grief, grief for unmet needs, lost hope, invisibility, and the version of your relationship you thought you were coming home to. She walks through how resentment typically forms i...

In this episode of From the Couch, Dr. Tracy teaches a relationship skill that quietly changes everything: differentiation. It’s the ability to hold onto your sense of self while staying connected to someone else, and to remember that another person’s thoughts, feelings, needs, or reactions are not automatically a commentary on your worth, your lovability, or whether you’re “doing enough.”Dr. Trac...

Dr. Tracy shares a shift that changed how she does couples therapy: most couples think their problem is communication, but often the real blocker is shame. You can have all the scripts, “I statements,” and conflict tools in the world, but when shame shows up, it hijacks the conversation and turns it into a survival response instead of a problem-solving moment. Dr. Tracy breaks down the crucial dif...

Ever catch yourself saying, “I shouldn’t have to tell you this” and immediately feel your brain power leak out through your ears? In this bite-sized episode, Dr. Tracy names a sneaky mental load pattern: “renting mom’s brain.” It’s those constant micro-asks, where’s my hat, did you see my keys, what are we doing for dinner, that pull you out of your own task to manage someone else’s. Dr. Tracy bre...

Ever had the moment where your partner says, “I did it,” but somehow…you’re still the one cleaning up the aftermath? In this episode, Dr. Tracy is joined by her husband Greg to talk about a surprisingly specific (and wildly common) mental load issue: not “closing the task.” Using their real-life bath time example, they break down how tasks have a beginning, middle, and end, and how skipping the “e...

In this short From the Couch Q&A episode, Dr. Tracy responds to a listener who feels crushed by guilt after she and her husband chose to go no-contact with his sister (and her family) after years of escalating conflict. The listener shares that the tension started around their engagement, with ongoing attacks, scapegoating, and a painful pattern of being blamed for “destroying the family.” Dr. Tra...

In this episode Dr. Tracy slows down one of the internet’s most popular relationship labels: weaponized incompetence. She names why the term resonates so deeply, especially for women carrying the mental load, and why it can feel like oxygen to finally have language for exhaustion, invisibility, and resentment. But Dr. Tracy also brings nuance to a conversation that often gets flattened. She explai...

In this short “From the Couch” episode, Dr. Tracy speaks to one of the most common pain points couples face around intimacy: one partner needs closeness to want sex, while the other experiences sex as the way they feel close. And when that mismatch goes unspoken, both people can start to feel rejected, pressured, and quietly alone even when love is still very much there. Dr. Tracy offers a simple...

In this episode of Dear Dr. Tracy, Dr. Tracy D is joined by psychologist, professor, and sex researcher Dr. Nicole McNichols for a grounded, shame-reducing conversation about sex, desire, and what actually helps couples build a satisfying intimate life in the real world. Together, they unpack why so many people feel anxious, awkward, or “broken” when it comes to sex, and how much of that is shaped...

In this “From the Couch” episode, Dr. Tracy responds to a listener who’s been carrying the fallout of a painful postpartum season, where in-law boundary violations piled up and their partner didn’t protect them in the ways they needed. She normalizes how often having a baby is the moment extended-family dynamics shift, because your needs change, your limits change, and suddenly the old rules don’t...

In this episode, Dr. Tracy shares five small, daily practices that can shift the emotional tone of your relationship, especially once the “new year” dust has actually settled. She names what many of us feel but don’t say out loud: January 1 is not exactly peak nervous-system readiness, and real change usually starts after the recovery period. LINKS FROM EPISODE: ⁠⁠⁠Hello Fresh: a free ZWILLING kni...

In this short “From the Couch” episode, Dr. Tracy talks about a common relationship moment: you’re about to head out for the night, and your partner is clearly struggling. Bad mood, stressed, kids melting down, the whole thing. And suddenly you’re standing there in your jacket wondering if you’re allowed to still go. Dr. Tracy explains why staying home can feel like the easier choice in the short...

In this episode, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish and Greg dig into something that quietly impacts a lot of couples: friendships and independence, especially male friendships in midlife and parenting seasons. They talk honestly about why it can feel so hard for men to maintain friendships, why guilt shows up when one partner tries to take time away, and how “defaulting to the kids” can become a relationship pa...

In this short “From the Couch” episode, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish answers a question many couples know by heart: “Are you mad at me?” Inspired by a comment on a recent reel with Greg, Dr. Tracy explores why this question shows up so often and why it’s rarely about the moment and more about older wiring, nervous system threat, and the stories we learned to tell ourselves in childhood. Using a simple yarn...

In this episode, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish sits down with Katie Wells, host of The Maximized Minimalist podcast and a leading voice in decluttering, to talk about what really keeps families stuck in overwhelm. Katie shares the emotional moment that changed how she saw clutter, why traditional “do more, try harder” organizing advice often fails, and the four types of clutter that require different tools....

In this From the Couch episode, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish explores why apologies often don’t land in relationships and what keeps couples feeling stuck even after saying “I’m sorry.” She explains how performative apologies, over-focusing on intent, and rushing forgiveness can minimize hurt and block true repair. Drawing from clinical experience, Dr. Tracy breaks down the role of impact, accountability,...

In this episode, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish and her husband Greg explore why accountability is so difficult in relationships and how blame quietly breaks connection. They unpack the difference between intent and impact, why apologies often fall flat, and how defensiveness shows up even when partners mean well. Through real-life examples and practical language, Dr. Tracy explains what true accountability...

This In-Case-You-Missed-It-Episode and a must-listen-to episode. Coming to you from Nashville, Tennessee, Dr. Tracy reunites in person with her dear friend Dr. Tanya Cotler, a clinical psychologist specializing in maternal mental health and child-parent attachment. Dr. Tracy kicks off the episode by sharing a recent personal experience of a body memory—a sudden, unexplained emotional outburst she...

In this solo episode, clinical psychologist and relationship expert Dr. Tracy Dalgleish invites listeners into the real emotional landscape of the holidays, far beyond picture perfect family photos. She shares five powerful reflections to help couples and parents move through holiday stress with more connection, less pressure, and a lot more self compassion. Drawing from her experience as a highly...

As the year winds down, many couples reflect on work, finances, and goals—but often forget to reflect on their relationship. In this episode, clinical psychologist and relationship expert Dr. Tracy Dalgleish shares why an end-of-year relationship check-in is one of the most powerful tools couples can use to move out of autopilot and into intention. This conversation isn’t about fixing, blaming, or...

Dr. Tracy Dalgleish answers listener questions on caregiving burnout when a partner has chronic health issues, using Spoon Theory to protect the relationship without losing yourself. She shares practical scripts for rebalancing roles during flare-ups, nervous system regulation tools, and ways to support kids with honesty, predictability, and emotional safety. The episode also covers how to stay co...

In this From The Couch episode, clinical psychologist and relationship expert Dr. Tracy Dalgleish unpacks a painful but common experience many couples face in in law relationships: The moment when a partner seems to disappear emotionally after stepping into their family of origin, leaving the other partner feeling alone, unprotected, or disconnected. Dr. Tracy explains why this shift happens, draw...

In this candid conversation, clinical psychologist Dr. Tracy Dalgleish and her husband Greg unpack a real moment from their own marriage to explore one of the most common and misunderstood relational challenges dismissiveness. Together they break down why phrases like “you’re right,” “everything will be fine,” and “don’t you think you’re being sensitive” leave partners feeling unseen and alone, ev...

In this episode, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish shares two of her most trusted strategies for navigating difficult family dynamics—especially during the holiday season when old patterns, expectations, and nervous system triggers tend to flare. Drawing from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, she explains why we can’t change or control others, and how “dropping the rope” and questioning the stories we tell our...

In this episode, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish unpacks one of the most painful and confusing dynamics she sees in couples: being warmly welcomed into a partner’s family—only to later become the outsider. Through a powerful listener story, she explores why these sudden shifts occur, how family systems create scapegoats, and why meaningful accountability is often out of reach. Dr. Tracy also breaks down what...