Cryptidiots

These big dumb idiots have never been dumber folks! John does is best bambino impression living his best life at a football match disrupted by aliens with angel hair?! And discuss possibly the most unfairly stacked cryptid in existence: the Grootslang.

The boys are back in town! After a few pre-records you've got the idiots live and in your stereo this time to wish you a happy Summer Solstice, match Cryptids to World Cup teams, and discuss one of the stranger Crytids on the market: the Telepathic Football.

Hey, I’m skinwalking here! In this episode the Cryptidiots discuss the Skinwalkers of Navajo legend and dispel many misconceptions about their lore. They also name and shame the creators of Skinwalker Ranch (booo!) and the history channel program Ancient Aliens (booo!), but ironically are also interrupted by an Earth TV transmission (bloop!).

It’s a lizard! It’s a man! It’s Lizard Man! This week the Cryptidiots talk about Pope Leo’s recent encyclical on AI, and how it both encourages an embrace of the unknown and absolves the Cryptidiots of all sins. They’re then blessed with the presence of a special guest from the Earth TV universe, before diving into the lore of the Lizard Man of Scape Ore Swamp, a cryptid with an origin that is ine...

Today we’re sharing the low down on the lobizon, and providing a public service by exposing the top 5 most haunted hotels. Listen to this episode if you want to make sure your kids don’t become werewolves. It’s the law.

Mi scusi! Stop what you’re doing and listen to the latest episodio of Cryptidiots, where the guys consider launching careers as mentalists and insurance fraudsters before spilling the tea on Italy’s favorite gossiping worm goat, the Badalisc. 

In this episode, its brodags before hodags, as the Cryptidiots discuss the pride of Rhinelander: the Hodag. They also discuss Dan’s latest act of heroism, as well as some scientific discoveries that may explain haunted houses, depression, and hostile work environments (and no, the reason behind all three isn’t just John).

What do you call a demon wrapped in an enigma rolled in thousands of years of myth? You call it the Bunyip of course. Or you call it John’s mom, that’s not a your mom joke, John’s mom joins us for this one and boy is it ever a blast. Tune it or shut up (just kidding we love you)!

Well we’ve done it folks, 3 times around the sun! In this Season 3 opener, we cover some mysterious disappearances in the extra-terrestrial science community and much more importantly, a dinosaur (introduced by Herner Werzog himself) that might still exist in the Congo. Grab your popcorn, your soda pop, and your dad because you won’t want to miss this one! 

The Cryptidiots cover more movies that would be better if a cryptid was introduced at the midpoint, and issue an apology to Chunk of the Goonies before investigating the Flatwoods Monster, a West Virginia cryptid whose sudden appearance in 1952 (and its subsequent Playboy spread) created a lasting cultural impact, inspiring films ranging from Men in Black, to Men in Black II.

If you think you’ve caught Wendigo Fever, leave us a voicemail. Episode 28 digs into the origins, folklore, and unsettling psychology behind this nightmarish cryptid. The Cryptidiots also discuss a newly discovered rhinoceros species before being interrupted by a transmission from Earth TV, featuring intergalactic star Chimothee Talamet reading a 4/20 poem.

We packed it all into this one folks! Dan's butt splinter update, a story about the first wolf in California in a century, more of John's internal degradation projected externally in the form of "fan mail" and of course the legend known as Gef the Mongoose (we spelled it “Jeff” for clickbait).

Hey Idiots (said with love of course), Artemis II has launched, humans are orbiting the moon for the first time in 50 years! Meanwhile, the inspiration for Beauty & the Beast (maybe) is still roaming wild in south central France (probably not). Tune in to learn more!

We are 25% of the way to 100 episodes! This very special milestone coincides with April Fools Day (kind of...close enough for Dan), so the Idiots discuss the Jackalope, a creature who originates from some merry pranksters. They also answer key questions like, “Which movies would be better if you introduced a cryptid at the midpoint?”, and “Is Barry Keoghan a squonk?”, as well as “Should we just ta...

The Cryptidiots react to some newly-announced government websites and answer listener questions about which cryptids are most capable of succeeding in corporate America or winning a hot dog eating content. Then they discuss the Slide-Rock Bolter a mountain-dwelling cryptid that hates tourists.

A special little interstitial episode for ya'll this week folks! Hear from the people who created Dan and unleashed upon your ears. We discuss Bigfoot sightings AND the Brazilian Hairy Leg (aka Perna Cabeluda).

And the laughs wouldn't stop coming until- *he gasps for air but nothing comes* - Find out the origin of this cryptic short by listening to this episode in which we're joined by literal laughter expert, Chris Duffy. Also, is Bigfoot a alien?!?!?!

Before you go on your next hike through the forest, you'd better listen to this one!

Folks. This one is the real deal. The BIG one. Despite our general foolishness, we were graced with a visit from legendary Cryptozoologist Sharon A Hill! We are truly so honored and guarantee you'll want more so head over to her blog https://sharonahill.com/ Afterward, we get into Canadian geriatric Old Ned. Get on in here!

You're out of your mind if you don't listen to this one. And if you want to find out how bad of a joke that was, you'd better listen. K love you byeeee!

The dumbos get another visit from the Earth TV fairies (aka, the podcast streams got crossed), and John discusses an absolute deviant of a cryptid in this star-studded episode.

This episode is for dreamers and drunks. The Cryptidiots examine John's childhood diary entries and a newly logged Bigfoot sighting before discussing the Shōjō, a very chill, very potbellied, and very alcoholic cryptid who is a resident of Japan, China, and Margaritaville.

New mics! Sound quality through the roof! Ever wonder where the phrase "little green men" came from? Well wonder no more if you listen to this delightful episode about.

WHAT AN EPISODE! We've got a very very special guest, our first ever, Chase from the massively popular TikTok & Instagram channel @ChasingLA. We get down and dirty on Griffith Park lore, focused on quite a few things that could be considered...the Griffith Park Beast!

A call to action, make Bigfoot CA's official state Cryptid https://bit.ly/cabigfoot and the bad at counting Rougarou! Please like, subscribe, & share!