Compassion in a T-Shirt

Can we actually measure the Three Circles Model? And if we can, what does that tell us about what's happening in our brains, bodies, and emotions? For years, the Three Circles Model has been one of the central ideas in Compassion Focused Therapy, helping therapists and clients make sense of threat, drive, and soothing. But until recently, it had never really been tested scientifically. In this epi...

Most of us think listening is easy. But if we're honest, we often listen with the intention to reply, advise, fix, persuade, or tell our own story. In this follow-up to my recent episode on listening as compassion, I explore what compassionate listening actually looks like in practice. Drawing on ideas from compassion-focused therapy, motivational interviewing, and the work of Carl Rogers, I share...

After the unexpected death of a dear friend, I found myself doing what many of us do when faced with grief. I tried to stay strong. I tried to carry on. But it wasn't until I sat around a campfire with friends—sharing memories, expressing sadness, and listening to one another—that something began to shift. That experience got me thinking about listening. In a world increasingly shaped by social me...

Teacher burnout doesn't just affect teachers—it affects students too. In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, Dr Stan Steindl speaks with Clinical Psychologist, educator, researcher, and founder of the Institute for Neuroscience and Education, Dr Rita Princi-Hubbard, about compassionate pedagogy, teacher wellbeing, and the fascinating ways stress and emotional regulation can flow between teach...

What if therapist burnout isn’t a personal failure, but a consequence of how we train psychologists to relate to themselves? In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with clinical psychologist and psychotherapist Tania Kalkidis about therapist burnout, the pressure to “fix” clients, and how modern mental health systems can unintentionally reinforce shame, perfectionism, emotional discon...

How personal should therapists be? Should helping professionals maintain emotional distance — or is genuine human connection part of what makes therapy healing? In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with consultant psychiatrist, writer, and editor Dr Glenn Roberts about one of the most important questions in therapy, psychiatry, and helping work: how much of ourselves should we bring...

What if the opposite of threat isn’t relaxation… but safeness? In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt , Dr Stan Steindl explores a powerful and often misunderstood idea from Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT): the soothing-affiliative system. Many people think compassion is simply about calming down, relaxing, or “down-regulating” stress. But drawing on Professor Paul Gilbert’s recent writing, S...

How do we find hope in the current global landscape? In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with psychologist and motivational interviewing trainer Denise Ernst for a thoughtful and deeply human conversation about hope — what it is, where it comes from, and why it may be one of the most important yet under-discussed elements of motivational interviewing. Denise describes hope not s...

What happens inside your mind when you wake up irritable frustrated…and then start criticising yourself for it? In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with clinical psychologist and Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT) expert Dr Chris Irons for a reflective, inside-out conversation on shame, self-criticism, and how compassion actually shows up in real life. We begin with a simple but,...

What happens when shame keeps someone silent? In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with clinical psychologist Dr Eve da Silva about the often hidden impact of online sexual harm — and how shame, self-criticism, and secrecy can leave young people feeling isolated and unable to seek help. Eve shares how her clinical work in CBT began to uncover a pattern: clients presenting with anxie...

What really drives elite performance — discipline, self-criticism, or something deeper? In this episode, I explore psychological flexibility, self-compassion, and high performance with Olympian Toby Jenkins. In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with Toby Jenkins — Olympian, entrepreneur, speaker, and coach — to explore leadership, high performance, and the inner world that shapes...

Why do we self-sabotage, criticise ourselves, or even create chaos in our own lives — sometimes right when things matter most? In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with clinical psychologist Dr Charlie Heriot-Maitland to explore his powerful new book Controlled Explosions in Mental Health. Together, we unpack a surprising and compassionate idea: that many of the things we struggl...

What is it like to encounter Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT) for the very first time — not in a textbook, but in a real clinical service, working with people whose threat systems are truly activated? In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with Tiffany Luxford, an undergraduate psychology student working at the Anxiety Disorders Residential Unit at the South London and Maudsley NHS...

What if compassion isn’t just something we feel—but something we can train? In this conversation, I sit down with social psychologist Associate Professor Paul Condon to explore his new book How Compassion Works (with John Makransky) and their evidence-based approach to Sustainable Compassion Training (SCT). We dive into a powerful idea: that we already have an innate capacity for love, compassion,...

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I sit down with psychotherapist Dr Elaine Beaumont to explore the growing pressures facing young adults — especially university students — and how self-criticism, shame, and burnout are shaping their mental health. We discuss how social media, comparison, and constant connectivity are impacting young people’s inner worlds, and why kindness may be a power...

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with Dr Lillian Ward from the Contemplative Studies Centre at the University of Melbourne about what “progress” in meditation really looks like beyond beginner programs — including the positive changes people hope for and the genuine challenges that can arise along the way. Meditation is often promoted for its benefits, such as improved wellbeing...

Compassion in healthcare is more than a value statement — it is a clinical skill, a leadership stance, and a systemic responsibility. In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with psychiatrist Caragh Behan (Royal College of Surgeons in Ireland) and Professor Brendan Kelly (Trinity College Dublin) about burnout, moral injury, empathy fatigue, and how to make compassion real in modern evi...

What if burnout isn’t a personal failure — but a cultural signal? In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with Natalia Sarro, an Argentinian psychologist based in Barcelona, Compassion Focused Therapy practitioner, and the first certified Spanish-speaking instructor with the Center for Compassionate Leadership. Natalia shares how her own identity became deeply tied to performance — and...

Menopause is one of the most significant transitions in a woman’s life — and yet it’s often ignored, misunderstood, or reduced to stereotypes about hormones and hot flushes. But menopause is not just biological. It’s psychological. It affects sleep, mood, identity, relationships, work, and wellbeing. In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I speak with Dr Lydia Brown, Senior Lecturer in Psycho...

Have you ever worked in a team where something went wrong — and you could feel the difference between blame and support? In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, Dr Stan Steindl speaks with Professor Helena Nguyen about workplace compassion as a team- and organisation-level capability, not just an individual trait. Interest in compassion at work has grown rapidly — driven by burnout, faster and...

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m joined by Margaret Cullen, a licensed psychotherapist and one of the true pioneers of bringing mindfulness and compassion into mainstream psychology, healthcare, and community settings. Margaret was among the first teachers certified in Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction, has taught internationally for decades, and spent over 30 years supporting peop...

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m joined by Douglas Smith, Professor of Social Work at the University of Illinois at Urbana–Champaign, Director of the Center for Prevention Research and Development, and a long-standing member of the Motivational Interviewing Network of Trainers. Doug and I explore his 2025 book Motivational Interviewing with Families, which re-imagines how Motivation...

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m joined by psychologists, writers, and podcasters Emma Waddington and Chris McCurry, the voices behind the podcast Life’s Little Secrets. Emma and Chris and I talk about how they first met and began working together, what drew them into collaboration, and how a shared curiosity about the inner lives of humans led to the creation of Life’s Little Secre...

In this episode of Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m joined by Rob Brockman, clinical psychologist, Schema Therapy practitioner, supervisor, and trainer. This is not a beginner’s introduction to Schema Therapy. Instead, Rob and I take a deeper, more nuanced look at how Schema Therapy understands the mind through modes — the vulnerable, angry, detached, critical, and healthy states we move in and out of...

In this returning conversation on Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m delighted to welcome back Dr Hayley D Quinn for a thoughtful and very grounded exploration of self-neglect, burnout, and what it really means to live with compassion. Hayley is a former clinical psychologist, wellbeing coach, author, and host of the Welcome to Self® podcast. She’s also the past president of Compassionate Mind Australia...