Clown People

Auuuughhhhhhhh... Hey..... Hey clownholes, we're in the Clown Cave with Austin (Gabi went home because she's weak of heart and spirit) to record a post-Dennys podcast, and oh my god help us - we have to shit so bad! But Austin was still there and we pulled through to provide another excellent episode of Clown People just for you! Load up on some crazy pancakes and settle in for a real 4D e...

Hey hey Clownpals, Gabini and Austin are still here in the Clown Cave and we finally really get into what each of these eligible partners need to do to become the true prize hogs they're destined to be! Will they take each others (or anyone's) advice? MAYHAPS! Find out today on CLOWN PEOPLE PODCAST PEWPEWPEWWWWW! Kisses!

Hey there Clownpigs, we got Gabi and Austin still in the Clown Cave, and today we're delving into what makes these freaks tick dating-wise! Gabi explains the lore of Boys Milk and Girls Milk, and contributes to the study of women ruining their daughters self image from an early age and how that totally doesn't affect ANYTHING!!! Nothing but PRISTINE PSYCHE'S OVER HERE! Listen today!

Hey Clowns what's going on! Are you having a hard time finding love? Do the people you seek avoid you? Well listen up! We have two of the leading experts in being horrific at dating in the Clown Cave today to talk about the horrible world of dating! You saw this messy snowball on the Live Podcast, it's Gabi Hajos! Joining us, you may have seen him crying on the YouTube dating show Trapped...

Woohoo! It's the 200th episode! We were joined by our dear clownpig friends Gabi, Logan, Nate, Tess and Cam with special shoutout to Andrew! We had a grand ol time putting together this video episode - We got cartoons, games, and of course: SNACK BRACKET. Thank you to everyone who came to the live event, Pat and Jeff for production support, and to all our Patreon supporters: Roberto, Cait, Maa...

What's up clownpigs! Have you ever frequented your local gas station and made friendly with that one chill staff member who seems to live there? Always there without fail, giving you that sense of stability you wish you got from your family? Well we have, and we got him on the podcast! Say HELLLLOOOOO DAAAAVE and hear Dave's wise words of wisdom on work/life balance and baking!

Hello Clownholes! Introducing another new Clown to the Clown Car, it's Gabi Hajos! We were thinking to ourselves "Hey, we don't have enough messy nightmare people on this podcast, let's import the expert!" We talk all kinds of EEEEGGGGGGS and shit, so give a listen!

Hey Clowns! We got a special pig for ya today, it's our ol' pal Brad Pierce! Listen to the sultry sounds of a thick Rhode Island accent caress your eardrums while we talk about how we both, unknown till now, had our marriage proposals done at the same zoo! SMALL AUTISTIC WORLD!

Greetings Clownpals! We have a new clownpig in the clown car with us today, clowntroducing: [Redacted because she's applying for grad school or something now and we're not tryna have our stupid 20 minute pod ruin someones life!]! We talk about the beautiful plains of South Dakota and Danish stereotypes! Some other stuff too, but guess you'll have to listen to find out! Just a very nice...

What's up clownpigs! Dropping a Bonus Episode for y'all this week! We have a very special pig in the car, it's our new pal Nate Hanet! He used to be a lawyer (still is? idk!) in Louisiana, so we got him on retainer for all kinds of swamp legislation! Meet him in this fun lil eppy today and we'll see y'all again on Tuesday! Go check out our instagram too for a new cartoon clip!...

What's up Clownakis, we talk a WHOLE LOTTA Yiayia this episode! Whomst is Yiayia? It's Greek for grandmother you UNCULTURED SWINE. Anyway, she got fell on and was all hopped up on fent or whatever so it's just very fun to talk about her and her big ol bussin beans! YOU TAKE!

What's up clownholes! We still have the wops (Cam Ohh and Andrew Balestieri) in our backseat, and we FINALLY discuss our favorite pasta shape! Give it a listen! We talk about it finally we swears it, we do!

Hey everyone, SURPRISE! Bonus episode! We meant to drop this a fiscal quarter ago, but Brieana got a horrific infection in her head and life has been boinking our big ol buns since! BUT WE DID IT! We edited the episode of us interviewing a bunch of different clowns while at Clown College and it was a lot of fun!!! Thank you to every clown who contributed and shout out specifically Cait the Clown f...

What's up Clownpigs! We got not one, but TWO! Count em TWO (2) big ol woperinos in the clown car today, Cam Ohh and Andrew Balestieri! We got KFC and all I wanted to do was talk about our favorite pasta shape, but it turned out to be everything but! Enjoy the episode and special surprise musical guest on Spotify or wherever!

Whattup Clownholes, in today's episode Brieana has anxiety over a soup villain, and we talk about the denizens of Fargo (Turns out, it's NOTHING like the movie now! We didn't see ONE woodchipper! Unbelievable!)

What's up Clowns, CREMATION IS A SCAM! So we're here to offer up some pipin' HOT alternatives to granulating your loved ones and storing them! Listen now for the riffs or simply to observe what 15+ hour drives does to the human psyche!

What's up Clownpissers, this episode was recorded on the long drive home from Montana many moons ago, and boy did Brieana have some BIG BRAIN thoughts! Hop on this train of thought and chuggachuggachoochoo along with us!

Ey Clowntoots, how are ya? We watched the Penguin (was like, 1.5 stars better than watching Brieana's dad die at least!) while in Montaaaynya, and alls yous needs to knows is, is IT'S PENGUIN TIIIIIME! Heavy spoilers and stretching the good will of music clips ahead!

What it do clownhogs! We saw a gigantic ass and it was life changing, and we talk about BANGIN' so if you know and don't wanna HEAR about our NATURAL MUSK and L O V E, then idk, listen to as much as you can before shutting it off, it's okay we see you when you do it anyway! Spotify tells us EVERYTHING! Fun story at the end for the REAL ONES.

What the fuck is up clowndawgs! This episode was recorded when we were in Montana! Legend says, that small white trash child is still on the sidewalk shoeless, showing people the wrong way to AirBnBs! Other stuff too. Listen today!

What's up clownholes! This episode was recorded PRE-DEED Death (PDD, it's how we denote time now, we're on our own clown calendar) so enjoy this glimpse into what we were dealing with on the way to Montana all those moons ago! Also, and we mean this as strongly as we can, FUCK landlords!

What's up clownpigs, we got a new BIG BRAIN MONEY MAKING SCHEME coming your way, but it's gunna take some big fat BALLS to pull it off! Listen today on Spottles, Apples, or in your Heart!

What's up freaks, today the clowns go over some IMPORTANT anatomy lore! For both the Hutts AND kangaroos. You know they both got pouches? Are Hutts marsupials? Who knows! Listen today!

Happy New Year clown pigs! New Year, Same CLOWNS fartin around and being lil goofs! Listen today and get all kinds of inspiration for your next dream and desire!

What's up clownerinos! We went out to birthday lunch at Tiny's (shout out Tiny's, they rule) and Brieana DEVIATED from her normal order of chicken croquettes! Never fucking doing that again! Let's end the year strong, crash out about gravy with us today!