Close the Door: Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire Podcast

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. The Vigil that outstinks all Vigil’s. Pycelle is Tywin’s biggest stan. Jaime decides getting nasty next to the dead body of a family member might not be proper, finally. Jaime and Tommen bond over going away inside. A Feast for Crows - Jaime I. Originally recorded in 2019.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 542

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Tommen throws pennies “to” the people. Are farts as useless as nipples on a breastplate? Gregor’s a milk of the puppy junkie. This is Cersei Unchained. We’ll miss you most of all, wine. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Cersei II Originally recorded in 2015.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 541

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. This is not the place to learn about life on a ship. How does the Titan roar, anyway? The House of Black and White is creepy but in an interesting way. Someone explain why she tries to eat that worm. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Arya I.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 540

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. George R. R. Martin is absolutely using Sam as a self-insert in this chapter. Does Sam not understand he can check books out of the library? Jon knows his Stannis situation looks bad from the outside. Does Jon need to go this hard at killing the boy? We’re all Team Gilly. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Samwell I.   Close The Door And Come Here - E...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Everything about Brienne is ugly, except for her eyes. And her soul. And her mare, which is not a piebald. We get inside Brienne's head and , no surprise, it's a beautiful place to be. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Brienne I. Originally recorded in 2019.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 538

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. You may love a Targaryen. Lot’s surprised we’re defending Cersei. Guile calls out the Cersei x Qyburn meet cute. We're all bonding over platonic Shea questioning. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - Cersei I. Originally recorded in 2015.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 537

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Dorne seems delightful as the metaphors literally drop from the sky. We meet the Sand Snakes through the male gaze, but at least we can fall back on our other senses with those delicious descriptions of Dornish food. Yum!! Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast for Crows - The Captain of Guards. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 536

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Is this the worst chapter in all of the books? Maybe, because the Iron Islands suck. Is it Damphair or Damfere and is he naked this entire chapter? Kingsmoot! Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A A Feast for Crows: The Prophet. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 535

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Magic is back! But what are these guys' names? We're as confused as readers back in 2006 at all of the new faces as we start in on Feast. At least Oldtown seems cool. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Feast For Crows Prologue. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 534

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. As we look back on Storm, is it really all Jaime and Brienne's fault that these books aren't finished? We talk about our favorite scenes, POVs and duos and more. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords Retrospective. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 533

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. When they go low, we go lower...so let's talk about the Freys! Was the Red Wedding a $5,000 dragon affair, or a $50,000 dragon gala? Either way, the sweet playlists of Roose Bolton & Lame Lothar's Wedding Planners will make your night. But now for a serious question, who was Lady Stoneheart's neck flap holder? Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Sto...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It's murder in a winter wonderland! But oh what a wonderland it is. We want to linger in the beauty of a snowy Winterfell, but the Moon Door beckons. Lysa deserves our sympathy, and she also deserves to binge watch a few shows on the Westerosi version of OWN. Oh, and stop trying to make Hot Hyle happen. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Sansa VII. Or...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Hail, hail the gang's all here. Jon ponders the life he could have, but could never have. We ponder Bloodraven's involvement in the whole thing and we get the glorious return of Ghost. GHOST! Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Jon XII Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 530

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Sam gets his electioneering on. Melisandre gets to talk to someone who already knows about Azor Ahai and we get to fall in love with peak Stannis. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Samwell V.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 529

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Hail, hail the gang's all here. It's been ten years, people. "Azor Ahai truly is the friends we made along the way." Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. 10th Anniversary Episode   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 528

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Your banter with Tyrion is awesome, even when you're breaking each other's hearts. Tyrion and Varys hold hands through the creepiest date night ever. Shae pets the wrong cat and Tywin gets what's coming to him as we finally close the door on Tyrion's chapters. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Tyrion XI. Originally recorded in 2018.   Close The Door...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Stannis is looking for his Davos in Jon while Melisandre is here to save Stannis from his middle child woes, but would a hot woman choose to smell like blood and smoke? Stannis offers Jon everything he's ever wanted, but is Winterfell worth the price of dealing with wildling bs for years? Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Jon XI.   C...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Sam is back at the Wall where George knows nothing about breastfeeding and they're convening the equivalent of the papal conclave to elect a lord commander. We consider questions such as: is life with Craster enough training to survive Randyll Tarly? And just what does freezer burned mammoth taste like? Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Sword...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It wouldn't be ASoIaF if someone wasn't dumping boiled wine on someone, but we're at the end of Arya's Storm journey and what a sad little journey it's been. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Arya XIII.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 524

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Jon is set up for failure by those two lovable scamps: Janos and Alliser when he's sent to meet with Mance. We still like Book Tormund, but we have real questions about George's sense of scale and the logic of the arrival of the cavalry. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Jon X.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 523

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. No more heavy leanings! Cersei tries to blow Jaime right out of the Kingsguard, but he's too busy rehearsing his big speech to Brienne. Jaime and Brienne act like awkward teenagers, and then Jaime acts like a man who can do whatever he chooses. Whatever he chooses. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Jaime IX. Originally recorded in 2019.   Close The D...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Dany's conquered yet another city state, but it's very much two steps forward, three steps back for her as she deals with the fallout and Jorah's crappy YouTube apology. Hell has frozen over and we find that we're the Dany Defense Squad now. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Daenerys VI.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 521

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Is Tywin a dad of his word? We’re not so sure. We are pretty sure he’s being poisoned, though. Tyrion’s putting all his faith in the Red Viper, and we wonder why Tywin didn’t see that coming. Join us for Inigo Montoya vs. The Mountain, a trial by combat for the ages, but not for the faint of heart. Just remember that snakes have no hands, but they do have eyes...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Jon and what's left at the Night's Watch are tired and so are we. We're not quite sure what the Turtle is, but our heroes are throwing stuff at the wall to see what sticks despite or because of GRRM's Looney Tunes physics. Janos Slynt arrives to spoil Jon's first good night of sleep in a while. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Jon I...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It's time to get your PEEEETYR on, as Littlefinger moves from his Tiny House in the Fingers to a deluxe apartment in the sky. Will Sansa move from pawn to player? Could GRRM possibly have more SanSan foreshadowing in this chapter? A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Sansa VI. Originally recorded in 2018.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 518