Clocking the Nation

It's a thiccy so we have two parts for y'all. Lawmakers have been so busted the house that Harvey Levin has opened a TMZ bureau in DC to track down lawmaker CUNKS like Ted Cruz, Lindsay Graham, and Eric Swalwell. Swalwell in particular has been getting his dirty laundry aired out, with leaked bideos and images that caused him to resign in disgrace. Elizabeth Warren made one of the best s...

Howdy girls, we're back for another episode with our cast of viewsmaxxers. It's clear the veil between X and our soyciety has officially lifted, and the monsters + DOGE designers are spilling out to dictate news and policy. James Fisback, a candidate for Florida Governor, is a right-wing troll gaining steam with College Rethuglicans and America Firsters, he's gone viral for his prop...

Oh hentie, it's a mess out here in 2026. Your hosts kick off their first episode of the year with a deep dive into the World Economic Forum, a collection of globalist dusties in Davos, Switzerland to share their worst ideas. Alex Karp of Palantir took the stage to rehabilitate his image, and Elon Musk went alien for views as he tries to seem palatable to European fuglies. A recent release of...

We've gotta close out the ran thru year of 2025 with another thick drop, our LONGEST yet. America's Widow, Mizz Erika Kirk, had an interview with CTN fav Bari Weiss that is making the rounds online. Her primetime town hall on CBS News captured her odd behavior, switching from being happy and cheery to what some are saying is a demonic presence...your hosts explore. The Piers Morgan show...

Hey hentai, it's a blessing to be back. Your fav hosts have been battling demonic forces IRL and triumphing, and we're excited to share more with y'all. Obviously, at the top of the list are more antics by Bari Weiss' Free Press, which is obsessed with Ozempic and Zohran Mamdani. We clock TFP Staff Writer Olivia Reingold, who has a terminal case of ZDS (Zohran Derangement Syndr...

This country is a giant MEZZ. Your gworls are back with a severe clocking of the Deep State. We take a look at Miss Bari Weiss, Founder of conservacuck outlet the Free Press. She's been tapped to lead CBS News into the corporate abyss. We explore her background and ties to Palantir, one of the largest sources of evil in our soyciety. CTN investigates the University of Austin, a private univer...

On this August edition of CTN, your hosts dive face first into the failed libs drooling while our country sinks deeper into its corporate crypt. Andrew Cuomo's social media team is flopping while trying to attack Zohran Mamdani for living in a rent stabilized apartment. We clock how Cuomo sounds turnt in recent videos, and how his campaign is prolapsing online. Minority Speaker Hakeem Jeffrie...

WE'RE BAAAACK to clock this fugly timeline. Zohran Mamdani's upset win in the NYC Democratic Mayor Primary has everyone's undies in a twist, especially Blue MAGA. After flopping to get in Andrew Cuomo's dusty house, they're hoping that Eric Adams will save them with his nothing for views get ready with me's on Reelz. Piers Morgan hosted a Google Meet zircle jerg with...

Hello Dubaiiii. Welcome to the Shahs of Sunset edition of CTN, where we clock how everyone and their mother is going Habibi for a view and a coin henny. Dump went on a tour to the Middle East, snagging coins, views, and planes. Elonka, feeling left out and debunked by shareholders, is making deals with Saudi Arabia, uploading his Starlink mess into their server. Their Minister of Communications an...

Miss Bonnie Blue recently set a record for being the most ranthru person on planet earth, clocking over 1k guys in 12 hours. She can't help but be anything8views on social media and even on local news shows. South African PayPal Dusties and other billionaire friends are lining up to Bonnie Blue all of us. Peter Thiel finally gets the clocking he deserves on this show, along with his other Sou...

Sorry it's been a minute gworls, we're excited to return with a thick episode filled with hilarious takes on the top stories of our busted nation. Elonka has been getting clocked, from White House meetings to Tesla dealerships nationwide. His musty outfits and behavior have been having real world consequences, we investigate how he's trying to clean up his act. JD Vance has also bee...

This soyciety is getting FUGLY THE HOUSE. In this episode, your girls clock the rise of the tech bro from nothing for views to taking over the inauguration. Elonka has been on a Yahtzee bender, giving salutes, calling into far-right German parties, and promoting mess on X. Even his own AI, Grok, thinks he's busted, especially after he got exposed for faking his video game prowess. Dusty Bill...

The much-anticipated Part 2 of the NUNU GAMES has arrived (y'all really seem to like this drop!) People are so desperate for views that they're begging while behind bars. Diddy is allegedly PISSED that Luigi is way more popular than him with other inmates, especially since he's innocent, he says. You wanna know how it smellll?????? Ask George Santos, he know it smell wellllll. He al...

Happy New Year goyals! We're kicking off 2025 with a two-part special to keep you fed. To start, we talk about how the year is getting off to a bumpy start, with attacks, disasters, and billionaire mess. We deep dive into Mark Zuckerberg's broification and make over of Meta to further dupe Elonka's house. Elonka Musk has been ruffling feathers over in MAGAland with his support of Vi...

Oooh girl this may be our best episode yet! The universe gifted us with a buffet of busted the house to feast on. Our fav work from home senator John Fetterman Zoomed into The View to share the dustiest takes. He says Biden should also pardon Dump and that Elon and Vivek are gonna drain the swamp with DOGE. Morning Joe has a total meltdown on air after his viewers accuse him of kissing Dump's...

Welcome to the official launch of S2 of Clocking the Nation! Your gurls are back on the busted beat, bringing you the biggest stories on this ran thru, blown out Nation. We're entering Dump 2.0, and we're seeing our predictions and theories from Season 1 take shape right before us. From Elon buying out the country and going full psycho on X, to the manosphere podcasts soaking up more vie...

Welcome to our SZN finale goyals! We're gearing up for our new fall era, so we wanted to cap off the first season of CTN with a big thank you to all of you. To start, your hosts dive into their origin stories and how growing up as outcasts pushed us to become chronically online girlies with a sense of humor. We also HAVE to clock the Nickocado Avocado tea, everyone thinks he's some maste...

Welcome back to a new episode goyals! We have all lived through multiple historical events and are entering an even cvntier timeline. To start, we dig into our FAV k!ller, Kyle Rittenhouse aka BustedTheHouse, who was getting eaten alive by MAGAs on X. Why? Because he was casting a ballot for Rand Paul instead of Donald Dump. Speaking of Dump, he took a massive shid on stage at the NABJ, we dissect...

Girlies, we're back with an episode right before our last Independence Day. Your co-hosts hit hard on the right-wing brainrot that's taking over our feeds and country. Miss Lily Gaddis has busted the universe on TikTok for views; we clock how her trad wife shtick is flopping because she's too nuts. Donald Trump and Joe Biden went toe to toe in the moldiest debate on Earth. We dive i...

Ooooweeee, another spicy drop for the goyals. We discuss the ran thru foods, vibes, and health issues plaguing ALL of our houses, no matter how healthy you think you are. While we're all thick and sick, we can take part in the many low-vibrational activities this country has to offer. OpenAI is adding more mess to the fire, considering whether people can use ChatGPT to generate smut and profa...

Our HIGHLY anticipated part 2 of mess is here! We expose the depth of America's love for plastic and how it has infiltrated all of our ussies. Instead of fixing our PFAS problem, the Supreme Court is spending its time finding new ways to bust on the homeless. Techies are further lowering our vibrations by releasing mess into the world and draining it of any meaning. Bill Maher is back with pr...

We've got a treat for the guys, the first of a two-part CTN special. In this episode, we cover the state of udder guzzlers in our nation and give you a Duolingo lesson on our mess. There's also no forgetting Kevin Leonardo, who is turning right-wing for views. We clock his Jeffree Star era. Then we talk about the Swiftie brain rot epidemic busting the planet. Elon Musk flopping the house...

Spring is here with new tea to clawk. Don Lemon and Elon Muss had the most nothing for views interview for the premier of the lemon show. It went so poorly, Miss Musk had Lemon's contract with X terminated. Doing laundry in one of these dusty cities is a new ring of demonic terror. Fighting over machines and letting your molds get moldy, it's a recipe for cottage cheese. We also clock ho...

The timeline is getting dustier by the week goyas. AI has only become more anything4views. We discuss how it could lead to global annihilation in the near future if we let tech bros continue to have their way with the world. Blue MAGA is having a meltdown over anyone who calls out Joe Biden's advanced age, including Jon Stewart, who returned to the Daily Show furious about the rematch of the...

Lady Liberty is looking pretty ran through these days. We're back with a new episode to clock the crusty state of affairs in this country. Justin Timberlake is trying to reboot his dying career to no avail. John Fetterman steps out on the town looking musty amidst his failing marriage and pandering to right-wing views. Speaking of which, we've got a bone to pick with Blue MAGA. Candace O...