Church of Lazlo Podcasts

Let Gen Z nap. That red card from last night's soccer game was... something. A couple made out on top of the Empire State Building, and Summer got a positive pregnancy test. SlimFast doesn't believe Lazlo actually watched the game, the guys catch up with Josh Vernier to talk baseball and Shohei Ohtani's own Bobby Bonilla Day, and they debate who should really be the face of America. Stream The Chu...

SlimFast used his contract as toilet paper, and has plans to be a coach for trans athletes. Lazlo wants his ashes spread across the Strip Club floor. Happy Bobby Bonilla Day! Never Trust Big Egg. SlimFasts' spirit animal is Merlin The Mexican Duck. Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts!

SlimFast almost has the DIY spirit, and Lazlo gets pissed at people complaining about the soccer hydration breaks. Lazlo spends like 10 minutes researching penis enlargement before FINALLY talking about Chris Johnson's ALS diagnosis. A mom is furious that Lazlo said "Big Dick," and Summer is way too excited for the new Minions movie. Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, o...

The A/C is broken, and it's HOT. If you want to make it big, start betting real money on Taylor Swift's wedding. TMZ got a new Nancy Guthrie letter. Lazlo explains how he got fired from Little Caesars, and SlimFast is working old sperm. Trump has surprised Lazlo with the Iran war, and a psychic is officially on an apology tour after false-predicting an alien invasion. Stream The Church of Lazlo po...

Lazlo and SlimFast talk with former NFL punter Chris Kluwe about his journey from the NFL to becoming a full-blown social activist. They get into football, social media, and how Kluwe got into California politics.

SlimFast played Cheerleader football, and Lazlo was hoping to bang some Brazilian woman at Oak Park Mall. Buckeyes' are SHOCKING. Where are Lazlo and Slim's invitations to Travis and Taylor's wedding? Lazlo gets pissed at a high school baseball game. Why take a shower before the pool if everyone pisses in it? Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your p...

Why would Lazlo buy a kid if he could just make one? And when has a pastor done any wrong? The guys don’t think they could take a drunk Dustin Poirier. Josh Vernier talks to the guys about Jac Caglianone and Bobby Witt. Lazlo argues with listeners about poll taxes. Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts!

SlimFast’s ‘ex’ was a respectable dancer, not a whore. Do you think Bill Gates ever bought his (alleged) Russian prostitutes a tempo? Lazlo calls out SlimFast for taking the Whitney Houston high road. SlimFast thinks his grandpa is Clive Davis, and Lazlo addresses the Reddit comments head-on. Lazlo says Summer looks miserable to date, and it does not go over well. Stream The Church of Lazlo podcas...

Lazlo feels a little naked without his wallet. The guys haven't talked about Nancy Guthrie OR Baby Lisa in a long time. Don’t grab your phone when it falls in the poo poo pee pee hole. Who CARES that Crumbl has a lot of sugar? Lazlo and SlimFast peer pressure Summer to take a shot. Young men, go drink Kentucky bourbon and get laid. Millennials, post more. Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Appl...

Has Lazlo done his annual backflip yet? The reflecting pool drama is so dumb, and Lazlo swears he will not participate in Teslas, Paramount, or UFC. Poodles either hump someone, or are on their way to hump something. Happy Father’s Day to those who choose not to be fathers! Lazlo and SlimFast talk about their dicks, and they also spend a weird amount of time talking about their pubes. Stream The C...

Lazlo and Summer finally have air conditioning, and the guys are slowly getting used to the idea of Snap Specs. Kansas City is in the nation's news. Without social media, kids are probably just going to play Kick the Can. The guys debate the Iran peace deal, and talk to Josh Vernier on what the Royals rotation may look like in 2027. A teacher got caught having sex in the back of a car with a stude...

Lazlo got freaky with SlimFast’s wife. Is debtors' prison real? Lazlo immediately knows his groceries are going to be messed up if the delivery guy's name is Steve. Our boss asked SlimFast to dial back the drunks. Would you pay fifty bucks for a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles pizza? Lazlo's seeing someone and wants to get a no-eared dog named Bombpop. SlimFast thinks he can undercut the local poop s...

Where is our beloved sex toy, Mother?! Lazlo and SlimFast agree on one thing: America was founded on winners and losers, not ties. Snooki remains Lazlo’s favorite little meatball, while SlimFast pitches the next hit reality show: White Trash Love Island. SlimFast shows Lazlo his AI porn, and the guys really enjoy targeted advertising. Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify,...

Lazlo thought Trump’s UFC event was great, and he went on the Schlitterbahn ride 3 days before the tragic incident. SlimFast is geeked over by the people who got rich off of Space X. Lazlo and SlimFast argue over the existence of trillionaires, and want to emphasize: Do NOT bungee jump or get in a helicopter in Brazil. Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you...

Lazlo's tinnitus is acting up: Or is it the non-stop fire alarm? Lazlo is absolutely devastated about the Home Improvement reboot being held up. Trump Mobile is about to be released, and SlimFast is scared of the kids riding E-Bikes in Walmart. What soccer teams line up with college football? SlimFast was a little too into Glenn Close. Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify,...

Lazlo pooped his pants when he was a professor, and Booger Eater helped sell glow sticks at Downtown Days. Bring back the Jim Rose Circus. What's so wrong about being a feeder content-house? SlimFast is anti breast feeding; He wants his baby to get used to processed food early on. Lazlo is actually banned from Canada, and has some strong opinions regarding Brendan Sorsby. Stream The Church of Lazl...

SlimFast got a new pair of pants after Lazlo lost ANOTHER big sports bet. Trump got booed at the Knicks game, and Slim's mom HATED him listening to Michael Jackson growing up. Lazlo is concerned Apple might take away his ability to get porn and drugs online, while the guys send their thoughts and prayers to the screw-worm scientists. Plus, homeless poop is very different from soccer mom poop, and...

Kansas City, we do NOT have the second largest urban park. Everyone's punching out of their weight class, and it was a pretty violent weekend for the metro. Lazlo and SlimFast have their first Divorce Monday with Slims’ lawyer brother, Joshua Mathews. God punished Slim for jacking it, and Lazlo's Dad discovered his poop porn. Would you pay to go see the AI Ozzy performance? Stream The Church of La...

SlimFast and Summer love to gossip, and Lazlo doesn't have the best reputation with his exes. There's ANOTHER kindergarten brawl. GoFundMe’s for old people is just sad, and it's hard to date someone with kids when you don’t have any. The lady with the leaky balloon knot is back in the news. Lazlo places his sports bets for tonight's Knicks game. Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Apple Podcasts...

That French son-of-a-bitch made Lazlo's asshole bleed. Should Bonnie Blu have a golden shower at her baby shower? SlimFast is definitely NOT on the sex offenders list. The guys talk with Vern about where the Royals stand. Are Lazlo and Slim actually happy? Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts!

HUGE update with the banned youth baseball coach. Women are taking over the world, so Lazlo and SlimFast are scared. Trump wants a dollar with his face on it, and the guys HATE camping. There's a ton of drama over at 60 Minutes. There's a fine line when you decide to yell at your boss. Kids are turning their backs on goldfish, and Slim realizes he was the second poorest kid in his school. Stream T...

Lazlo went to marriage counseling, and fantasizes about watching Rob Stewart with SlimFasts’ mom. Sabrina Carpenter is getting stalked. SlimFast has a LOT riding on these sports bets. If it's bright red you’re good; But if it’s dark red, eat beets. Trump apparently cussed out Netanyahu. Lazlos is trying to get a dog that doesn't piss itself whenever it thunders, and SlimFast is worried that he’ll...

Aw, Lazlo and SlimFast have their matching gay shirts on today! Was Tom Hardy booted from MobLand? SlimFast is here for Stedman, not Oprah. Pre-9/11, you could get a hotdog without getting jumped. Throwing a 70 mph speedball into the opposing teams dugout isn’t the answer, coach. New polymarket bet! SlimFast predicted Nancy Guthrie will be found in September. Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on...

Is our boss listening to us right now…? A cougar is basically a predator. Lazlo doesn’t think Jaxon Dart made the right move. Throwing a Nazi salute to make a point? Probably not the best strategy. Is stolen valor really that serious? Plus, Lazlo and SlimFast debate whether Patrick Mahomes should sit out the first couple games to protect that ACL. Stream The Church of Lazlo on Apple Podcasts, Spot...

Chris Hansen is BACK! Where's the best hamburger? Lazlo tries to get SlimFast in on his vending machine business. A woman with no hand was ticketed for using a phone while driving, and Kansas City placed dead last in cities ready for the big soccer tournament coming up. Lazlo' s a big porn advocate. Pastors have two words of advice: Find God, and lose at least 20 to 30 lbs. Stream The Church of La...