Check My Vibe

Coping isn’t the problem. It’s the strategy. In this solo episode, I unpack the ways we learn to regulate ourselves when no one models emotional regulation for us. From drinking and distraction to overworking and seeking validation, this conversation names coping behaviors without shame — and explores what they were protecting us from. We dive into: The difference between regulation and escape Why...

In this episode, good friend Jaelyn Robinson and Host Smit explore how people-pleasing, shrinking, and being “easy” aren’t personality traits — they’re learned adaptations. Through an honest, reflective conversation, we unpack who we learned we needed to be to stay safe, how self-abandonment can feel responsible, and where these patterns continue to show up in adulthood — at work, in friendships,...

Adaptation kept you safe—but it didn’t come without a cost. In this solo episode, we explore how the versions of ourselves we created to survive early emotional environments can quietly shape our adult lives. From people-pleasing and over-functioning to shrinking our needs and staying longer than we should, this episode names the hidden price of staying adaptable for too long. This conversation un...

Before you try to unlearn a habit, you have to understand why it existed in the first place. In this opening episode of Season 2, we explore what the inner child actually means—not in an aesthetic or nostalgic way, but as the part of you shaped by early emotional environments. The part that learned how to stay safe, quiet, agreeable, or “easy” when consistency or understanding wasn’t guaranteed. T...

We all carry pieces of ourselves that learned how to survive before we learned how to feel safe. Unfinished Business is a season about those patterns—how they show up in our lives, friendships, and habits, and how we can start to heal the parts of us that were left behind. This isn’t about love or relationships—it’s about understanding why we do what we do, releasing what no longer serves us, and...

In the season finale of Check My Vibe , host Smit turns the mic inward for the most personal episode yet. After a season exploring friendship, community, and the unspoken truths behind “I’m good,” this episode is a raw reflection on loneliness, emotional isolation, and the messy, beautiful work of showing up for yourself. From navigating the paradox of being digitally connected but emotionally uns...

Not all families are made by blood—and some of the deepest, most powerful connections we form are the ones we choose. In this episode of Check My Vibe , host Jalen Smith is joined by his cousin and chosen brother, Randall Smith, for a heartfelt conversation on the beauty, depth, and necessity of chosen family. Together, they explore how queer folks, creatives, and those navigating survival often b...

Real friendship takes work—and in this episode, we get honest about what that really means. Host Smit is joined by longtime friend and educator Nina Felton to explore the emotional labor behind sustaining friendships. From managing awkward conversations and unmet expectations to navigating one-sided effort and growing apart, they unpack why friendship isn't always effortless—and why it shouldn’t b...

Sometimes, the hardest kind of loneliness is the one that happens when you're not actually alone. In this episode, we explore what it means to feel invisible in a room full of people—at parties, with family, at work, or even online. Smit shares a personal story, and a special guest, K. Bolden, opens up about their own experience with this quiet kind of disconnection. Together, we unpack why th...

What does community actually mean when you’re grown, busy, and still figuring out who really sees you? In this reflective and real second episode, I sit down with my good friend Quintonn—someone who’s become an unexpected but essential part of my core community—to unpack what community looks and feels like in adulthood. We talk about the difference between surface-level connection and the deep stu...

Welcome to the first episode of Check My Vibe —a space for honest conversations about connection, loneliness, and all the feelings we usually keep to ourselves. In this solo episode, I’m sharing the story of one Sunday night that started with solo plans and ended in a spiral of overthinking, frustration, and that deep, aching question: Do I really have people I can turn to? If you’ve ever felt dis...