Cackalack Panthers Chat

The Panthers have officially benched their first overall pick of the 2023 draft. After years of woe, misery, and the worst record in the NFL during the Tepper era, the CPC Team have come to the conclusion that this organization is cursed. So, we wracked our brains and scoured the internet to concoct a series of rituals to exorcise the demons.

All we can say is that the Panthers technically "played" an NFL game this past Sunday.

Morgan and Canales came out swinging in their first draft. Will the risks inject some much needed talent into the roster? We'll have to wait and see. We won't, however, withhold our uneducated opinions.

The CPC Team discusses the new(new(new)) regime that will certainly lead the Panthers to glory - maybe in the next five years. Willstradamus makes a statement so bold, so confident, that it renders Reverend Spicey agape and speechless.

The most demoralizing, embarrassing, hopeless season in Panthers history is mercifully over, so the CPC Team reconvened to discuss what's next. Who can right the ship? How many years of suckitude will the fans endure? Will Tepper learn from his litany of mistakes and oversteps?

Help us break a 56 loss streak when the Panthers trail in the 4th quarter, for one.

Well, this season has not started the way anyone had hoped. 0-4 staring down the barrel of 0-6, questions around our first round draft pick, our coaching, our management, our ownership. These are the dark times, and the CPC team has decided to take a step back for a couple of weeks. We had a ton of fun with this episode and we're holding out hope for some positive developments to chat about in...

'“Man hands on misery to man,” Scott Fitterer said. “It deepens like a coastal shelf. Get out as early as you can–” Here he coughed, a ghastly sound, and his hands clutched his chest. “And don’t let your kids be Panthers fans,” he finished, and uttered a short, sharp laugh, before trading away the last of his draft picks to move up in the third round for a project receiver.'

It is a dark time for the Panthers. Although the Rhule Regime has been destroyed, Division squads have driven the Loyalist forces from their preseason optimism and plunged them into uncertainty. Evading the dreaded 0-2 Startfleet, a group of brightside fighters led by Reverend Spicewalker has established a new secret base on the remote planet of Hope. The evil lord Darth Stradamus, obsessed with f...

Panthers football is back, baby, and nothing says "fall is in the air" like the sweet kiss of hopium following a sloppy loss. This is gonna be the year we turn it around!

Our favorite guest, Greg Jr. AKA Catman Jr., joins Rev. Spicey, Mel, and Willstradamus to shoot the breeze in anticipation of the first Panthers game of the new era!

Get to know Mel.

Get to know Willstradamus.

Get to know BK.

Get to know Rev. Spicey.

The crew (minus Will) finally pulled out of their post draft stupor, made some Bryce cubes, jumped in the studio, fumbled the opener, poured some Bryced tea, invited a special guest, talked draft, weiner mobile, and laughed incessantly at one host's dream to build Forever-ever Land - in that order.  Welcome to the Bryce cream party!

The CPC Team caught up with Panthers superfan Catman Jr. to discuss his thoughts on last season, this (refreshingly exciting) offseason, and the future of the Panthers.

Hiring Frank Reich is like when a wealthy, divorced middle-aged dad dates a 24-year-old and gets burned so badly it causes him to actually self-reflect with enough sincerity that he is able to discover his true values and search for an age-appropriate partner with life experience and a shared vision.

In classic Panthers fashion, the team went out and won a meaningless game to close out the season in an unconvincing way. Local legend Reverend Spicey returns to the show to eulogize another disappointing season. Here's to a great coaching hire and a strong draft so the team can finally claw its way out of mediocrity!

What else could you expect with Keith Taylor and CJ Henderson "covering" Mike Evans?

Dashing through the snow  With a five-win "football" team O'er the fields we go  Laughing all the way  At least, through all the inconsistency and disappointment of the season, we get to spend time with the people that make us laugh! Merry Christmas and happy holidays from the CPC Team.

Luckily Geno wasn't granted the trademark.

Another Panthers win, another series of unfortunate events that prevented the whole crew from assembling. This week, Adam and Willstradamus did a two-man show to break the streak, and - no surprise to the women in their lives - managed to fill the basement studio, as well as a full episode, with their hot air. 

While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a clapping, As if some QB gently rapping, rapping at the redzone door— "'Tis some visitor," I muttered, "tapping at the redzone door—                Only this and nothing more." And then Shi Smith fumbled.

Well, what happened was, that game, we got our ass kicked. In the first half, we just got our ass totally kicked. We couldn’t do diddly poo offensively, we couldn’t make a first down, we couldn’t run the ball, we didn’t try to run the ball, we couldn’t complete a pass – we sucked. The second half, we sucked. We couldn’t stop the run. Every time they got the ball, they went down and got points. We...