Burn & Rave

In this star-studded episode of studs who think they are stars, Ryan and Sam debate The Simpsons vs. Futurama. Ryan solves homelessness with an absolutely brilliant plan, and Sam invents a red-light, green-light dating app that will revolutionize dating culture forever. We also learn about Ryan's obsession with Martha Stewart's box and why Sam needs to buy a Smart Car. #BDE  Tune in, vib...

In this episode of the award-winning Burn & Rave podcast, you will learn about the following: How to Get Rich Epileptic Police Officers California vs. The World Ryan's Fears The Benefits of Riboflavin  The Power of Beets Hooker Startup Industry The Joys of Micro-Management We use the term "learn" loosely. Tune in, vibe out, share, and enjoy this episode responsibly. Remember: &q...

In this provocative new episode of Burn & Rave, Ryan and Sam cure migraines, breakdown gay geography, and they finally explain why everyone runs away from Ryan at Home Depot. They also reinvent self-stimulation through puppetry, and peppered throughout this doozy of an episode is a lot of heart, a lot of inspiration, and a lot of laughs or your money back!   Tune in, vibe out, share, and enjoy...

What do John Wayne Bobbit & Joey Buttafuoco have in common? They're both on the show. Well, not on the show, but we discuss their trials, tribulations, and severed genitals. Also, we discuss National Geographic's monopoly on animal pornography and how we can tap that market (not the animals). Sam invents an app for NDA agreements while Ryan gets deep in his feelings and expresses his...

In this highly anticipated, ground-breaking, historic new episode, Ryan and Sam discuss the ongoing competition between them and their better halves. Also, Ryan talks a bit about his mothertruckin' lot lizard fetishes. Additionally, Sam explains how to be sexually attractive to women, and possibly men. Tune in, vibe out, share, and enjoy this episode responsibly. Remember: "Do not go gen...

We are back  from our Covid hiatus! Thank you for your patience! In this brilliant new episode, we discuss Covid conspiracy theories, Flash Gordon, women drivers and what Ryan saw as a truck driver. We also break down our competitive edges and Ryan's edge is sharp enough to injure loved ones. Meanwhile, Sam crushes his son in a Father/Son swim competition. We also get really deep and channel...

In this brilliant new episode, Sam explains the old concept of "bros before hoes" to Ryan, and Ryan explains his love of Disney's Frozen. Additionally, they explore the subtle difference between and slap and a spank, Class A vs Class C licenses, sliding down Powell Street in San Francisco, wife seduction, and they miraculously solve both the prison and homeless problem with one bril...

Please enjoy another bonus (but unfortunately Joeless) episode of "The ILLiterists," a Burn & Rave production that shows a more literary side of Ryan, the mechanic, and Sam, the professor. In each episode, they share original writing, then discuss the influence and impact of each piece. The goal of this show is to inspire more creative writing, spiritual wellness, and to create a dee...

As the country wars over reproductive rights and chaos ensues overseas, the boys of Burn and Rave are compelled to discuss all the hot topics like anchovies, jock pockets (sports bras for men)  and swinger parties. In addition, they discuss the very large package of meat they received. Sam and Ryan write spontaneous haiku and Ryan got a haircut . . . but it's not that super. Tune in, vibe out...

Please enjoy this bi-weekly bonus but unfortunately Joeless premiere episode of "The ILLiterists," a Burn & Rave production that shows a softer and more literary side of Ryan, the mechanic, and Sam, the professor. In each episode, they share short literary, dare we say, Pulitzer-Prize worthy  works they wrote and discuss the influence and impact of each piece.  The goal of this show...

Look out, San Francisco! You just stepped into the Burn & Rave podcast (and probably in a pile of crap too. Let's be honest.) but don't worry, we have figured out how to monetize your poop problem! In this scholarly episode, Ryan shares his secret to stellar vocal warm ups and Sam explains the phallic and yonic imagery in society. BREAKING NEWS: We also learn that Ryan is a major Spi...

In this chocolate-covered episode, Ryan and Sam debate the definition of "sandwich" when Ryan doesn't accept the deliciousness of Sam's dessert sensation. They also invent the "Fart Flute," a genius invention for untimely gas, and Sam breaks down Gen Z and his family's "promposal" ritual to Ryan who can't fathom such a thing. Things get personal in...

Is Green Warfare possible? The boyz of Burn & Rave believe their idea for sustainable bullets needs Pentagon eyes on it ASAP.  Also, in this episode, we learn the origins of gynecology, Ryan accumulates too much saliva and blood at the dentist, and Schwan's trucks need to be rebranded for the 21st century. Also, Sam breaks the (gl)ass ceiling and they introduce the ILLliterists to the wor...

Sam: "What's this episode about again?" Joe: "It’s about why Sam is tastier than Ryan to a Cannibal, Sam and Ryan decide on selling their pickles. Ryan promotes the boxed grocery trend while Sam tries to expose Ryan to middle eastern cuisine. P.s. Don’t let you mother in law hear what you said about her chickpeas." Ryan: "What episode? We have a podcast?" Tune in...

In this ridiculous new episode of the Burn and Rave podcast, Sam, the professor, explains key differences between White & Brown culture while Ryan, the mechanic, explains why he spent so much time in the C.U.M. Room. Together they invent Bouncer Babysitters, a daycare for on-the-go alcoholic moms, and Ryan explains who The Who is to Sam while Sam explains what The Who is really saying to Ryan....

Look, we don't know what we're doing, so this episode went off the rails somewhere between Monkey Town, where Ryan is king, obviously, and Sam inventing Dog Fit, a CrossFit Canine Therapy and Fitness Center for Near-Death Dogs. Sam also tries to convince Ryan to get a massage, but Ryan is convinced Sam is having an affair. Things get tense on this all-new episode of BNR! Tune in, vibe ou...

Originally entitled "Leggings, Jeggings, and Ryan Pegging," this brand new episode features a peek into the life of a trucker's DM, information on the sweets and meats diet that is taking over the 209, and Ryan explains why his family feeds him dog treats. In mind-blowing news, Ryan thinks XYZ means something and Sam does not. We need your help to settle this debate. And in the worl...

In this episode, Ryan and Sam find common ground in their ability to personify and mathematicians are pitted against poets in a battle royale. Meanwhile, Ryan reviews poetry slams and Sam explains how easily he can bankrupt Ryan. In science, Ryan breaks down the truth behind hummingbirds while Sam explains how to levitate.  Also, Ryan educates listeners about what happens to snitches. Spoiler: It...

Will Ryan be replaced? He seems to think so after Sam's TikTok post goes viral. Also, we learn that Ryan likes encyclopedias and garters, which confuses Sam, but Sam is easily confused. In bromance news, we learn how Joe finally met Ryan, and we discuss swingers and the ethical line between paying to make adult films (legal) and adults paying other adults to do the things they see in those fi...

Do you know what happens to snitches? Did you know that clouds are really the souls of dinosaurs? The boys of Burn and Rave ponder the science of snitching, paleontology, and they invent a potion that is so potent, it may be banned. (I bet you can already guess the secret ingredient.) Meanwhile, in Hollywood news, Sam and Ryan explain the new rules for getting starring film roles, draft the perfec...

In this brand new episode of Burn and Rave, Ryan explains his dogs' g-spots while Sam confesses his sins while playing a game of billiards at a local tavern. In other news, Ryan reveals that he loathes a new breed of mosquitoes, despises gin (and anyone who drinks it), hates motorhomes, and is deeply disturbed by Sam's Boob Visor idea. Also, they learn how to communicate better and how t...

The Burn and Rave boys pitch two brilliant, Shark-Tank level ideas for Adventure Funerals and weaponizing corpses. (We hope the Pentagon is tuning in.) Sam also drops some award-winning haiku (Remember: He was a poet laureate) and Ryan reveals his Van-Gogh talents. They also solve racism and sexism in under an hour. (P.s. Sam also needs Ryan to help him lie to a friend who he hopes is not listenin...

We are probably going to be writing a number of apology letters to a few of you after this episode. Not sure how it happened (again), but Ryan and Sam went off the rails. They somehow manage to defend beastiality, monetize punishment for pedophiles, and increase revenue at Walmart through their wedding services. Also, Ryan, we learn, really likes cats and Sam thinks a homophone refers to a word th...

It's our ONE-YEAR ANNIVERSARY! Joe surprised us all with a clip show and call-ins from listeners, including Ryan's wife and Sam's four wives! This show emboldens, inspires, motivates, and worst of all,  enables Ryan and Sam to continue sharing their brilliance with the world. This surprise anniversary show also proves that Joe is a mighty talented genius of epic proportions. (That&a...

In this brand spanking new episode of the incomparable, award-not-winning podcast, Sam give Ryan a behind-the-scenes tour of Sam's appearance on another podcast, which really is a form of cheating. Ryan's finger gets him in trouble again, and the men of Burn & Rave help listeners channel their anxiety into excitement. They also create the OTP: Objective Truth Party , a new political...