BPD Diaries: Stories and Science with Steff

For decades, Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) has been painted as a “woman’s disorder.” But what happens when you’re a man, transgender, or non-binary and struggling with BPD? Does the system see you, or miss you? In this episode we explore the myths and realities of gender and BPD. We dive into the research that challenges old assumptions, explore how socialization shapes symptom expression,...

Why does a quiet partner at dinner instantly mean they're going to leave? Why does a friend's joke feel like a personal attack? If you have BPD, you know this spiral all too well. In this episode, we explore how Mentalization-Based Treatment (MBT) is a therapy designed to address the core of this exact problem, and we break down the life-changing concept of "mentalizing". 🌱 Have...

Hi everyone! Happy World Mental Health Day from your hosts Steff and Kerry! Here at BPD Diaries, we know that understanding our minds is a journey we don't have to take alone. Today, and every day, we see you, we hear you, and we're so glad you're part of this community. Wherever you are in your story, your experiences are valid. Thanks for listening, and for helping to create a world...

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) has become a buzzword in trauma therapy, but what does it mean for Borderline Personality Disorder? If you've ever wondered what it is and if moving your eyes back and forth can actually help with the intense emotional pain, fear of abandonment, and identity disturbances of BPD, this episode is for you. 🌱 Have questions, stories, or somethi...

If you've ever asked yourself, "Why do I keep doing this?!" when it comes to relationships, self-sabotage, or your inner critic, this episode is for you. DBT gives us the tools for the  what , but Schema Therapy answers the  why . Trigger Warning:  We mention sensitive topics. Take care and pause if you need to. 🌱 Have questions, stories, or something you’d like us to cover? We’d lo...

If you're tired of being terrorized by your own mind, this episode is your first step toward freedom. For people with BPD, it’s like your mind is on fire. It’s like being in a runaway car with no brakes. In this episode, we explore the life-changing practice of mindfulness, not as a way to empty your mind, but as a way to finally get some distance from it. This isn't woo-woo wellness; it&#...

This episode explores the powerhouse toolkit of Dialectical Behavior Therapy: what it is, how it works on the brain, and why it's so often recommended. Join us for a balanced, evidence-based look at the therapy that promises a “life worth living,” where we share our own experiences with the skills that changed everything. We keep it real about the criticisms, the time commitment, and practical...

Ever wondered if ADHD and BPD are connected?  These two are often confused because they share similar symptoms. But behind the labels, there are important differences in how they affect the brain, behavior, and relationships.   In this episode, we explore where they overlap, where they differ, and what actually helps when you’re living with both. Trigger Warning:  We mention sensitive topics. Take...

In this episode, we unpack the ongoing debate about the relationship between Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and Complex PTSD (C-PTSD). Are they truly distinct conditions, or two sides of the same coin? With so many overlapping symptoms, many clinicians and survivors wonder if BPD is better understood as a trauma disorder. Trigger Warning:  We mention sensitive topics. Take care and pause if...

From Aileen Wuornos to Ted Bundy, are people with BPD criminals or misunderstood? And why do so many inmates have BPD? Are people with Borderline Personality Disorder* more likely to commit crimes, or more likely to be criminalized for trauma-driven behavior? In this episode, we dig into research, stats, and explore infamous cases like Eileen Wuornos, Ted Bundy, and Jeffrey Dahmer. From impulsivit...

What does it  really  mean to love someone with Borderline Personality Disorder*? In this powerful episode, we flip the lens, not just on living with BPD, but on loving someone who does. BPD is often misunderstood, and so are the relationships surrounding it. Partners, friends, and family are sometimes labeled as "enablers," or warned that people with BPD are “toxic” or “manipulative.” B...

Why is Borderline Personality Disorder still so misunderstood? In this episode we explore the stigma surrounding BPD, from the media, to the police force, to mental health professionals. We look at structural stigma, public stigma, and self-stigma, exploring real stories, real harm, and how validation and awareness can lead to healing. 🌱 Have questions, stories, or something you’d like us to cove...

Why are so many celebrities labeled as “crazy,” “unstable,” or “too emotional”, and how often is that linked to Borderline Personality Disorder*? We’re not here to gossip or diagnose, but we explore how public figures have either disclosed or been linked to BPD, and what that means for public awareness and stigma. From the courtroom controversy of Amber Heard   to the tragic loss of Amy Winehouse,...

In this episode we explore the disorienting symptoms of transient paranoia and dissociation in Borderline Personality Disorder*. You'll hear personal stories, learn what the latest research says, and most importantly, we dive into real strategies for grounding yourself, challenging paranoid thoughts, and reconnecting with reality.  🌱 Have questions, stories, or something you’d like us to cove...

In this deeply important episode of  BPD Diaries: Stories and Science , we discuss the difficult yet important topic of self-harm and suicidal behavior in individuals with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). We offer a space for understanding and healing, and show that these actions are not necessarily about seeking attention, they are survival responses to unbearable pain. If you or someone yo...

In this episode, we dive into the explosive, uncontrollable anger symptom of BPD. From internal rage, snapping over small triggers to full-blown rage that leaves guilt and shame in its wake, we explore where this anger comes from, how it ties into trauma, and what can actually help. ⛔  Trigger Warning:  This episode discusses violence, and partner violence. Please listen with care and take breaks...

In this episode, we dive into the silent crisis of chronic feelings of emptiness. We explore what this inner void really is (spoiler: it’s not just loneliness, depression, or boredom), how it impacts identity, and why it often leads to impulsive or self-harming behavior. We explore it through lived experience and the latest research, sharing evidence-based strategies from mindfulness to meaning-ma...

Feeling Everything, Everywhere, All at Once In this episode, we discuss the emotional rollercoaster that defines emotional instability. From sudden mood shifts to intense reactions that seem to come out of nowhere, we explore why this happens, how it impacts daily life, and what the science says. We’ll explore how childhood trauma wires the brain for emotional extremes and share  evidence-based co...

Ever looked in the mirror and felt like a stranger? Or changed your personality, hobbies, or even values depending on who you’re with? If your sense of self feels like a moving target, you’re not alone. Hear how BPD* turns life into a series of reinventions, how relationships shape identity, and how neuroscience, trauma research, and therapy offer a path toward a more stable sense of self. Trigger...

Why did I say that? Why did I do that? Why couldn’t I stop? In this episode, we explore the whirlwind of impulsivity in Borderline Personality Disorder, from risky decisions and explosive reactions to the silent shame that follows. We break down what’s happening in the brain during those all-or-nothing moments, and how emotional dysregulation, a reactive amygdala, and underactive impulse-control s...

Why do our relationships start like soulmates and end in emotional wreckage? In this episode, we unpack the rollercoaster of  unstable relationships , a core (and exhausting) symptom of Borderline Personality Disorder*. We explore how early attachment wounds, abandonment fears, and emotional dysregulation play out in love, friendship, and everything in between. We talk about everything from the fa...

Why does it hurt  so much  when someone pulls away — even a little? In this episode, we dig into the fear of abandonment: one of the most painful and core symptoms of BPD. We explore how early attachment wounds, brain differences, and invalidating environments shape our deep fear of being left — and why even small changes in connection can feel like devastation. We balance the science with lived e...

Steff shares her personal journey with Borderline Personality Disorder*, touching on identity struggles, toxic relationships, and how mindfulness shaped her recovery. A deep dive into the heart of BPD through the lens of survival, reflection, and hope. Trigger Warning : Discusses suicide, emotional and physical abuse, and eating disorders; take care. 🌱  Have questions, stories, or something you&#...

Kerry opens up about her lived experience with Borderline Personality Disorder*. From deep emotional highs and lows, to the diagnosis that changed everything, the lowest points, and the coping strategies that helped her reclaim her life. Vulnerable, raw, and powerful. This is a story of reclaiming her life and learning how to live with big emotions. Trigger Warning : Discusses suicide, emotional a...

Let’s go deeper: Why does Borderline Personality Disorder* develop? We explore what’s going on in the body and brain (think amygdala, prefrontal cortex, hormones, and nervous system stuff) and how environment and trauma interact with biology - the Biosocial Theory according to Marsh Linehan. This is the “nature  and  nurture” episode, where the science gets personal. Trigger Warning : Discusses BP...