Big Book Awakening

In episode #80, Bill R. shares how his father started drinking hard when he was nine. During his alcoholic rage, his father took it out on him. That's when fear reared its ugly head in his life, and Bill lived in fear for a long time. Drugs and alcohol distracted him from the fear. "If I was enjoying my drinking, I was not controlling it. And I was out of control for many years."

In episode #79, Pat A. shares how he had a problem with God in the past. "It's not that way today. And that's a message of joy and hope." So what's playing God? If I am going to tell you how it is, I am playing God because I am not satisfied with what is here. If I am afraid of God? I am living my life based on a thought.

In episode #78, Keith shares how he stepped in the door for twelve years and right into step four, skipping one, two, and three. Keith shares how one of his sponsees did not believe in anything. One day the sponsee said: "I just wish my grandmother was here." So Keith suggested why don't you make your Grandma your higher power? The sponsee has ten years sober today just because he di...

In Episode #77, Jason confesses, "I have never been able to be honest with people. I've always been concerned about what you thought about me." He continues: "Through reliance on God and the steps in this program, I've come to this place where I can honestly say I am grasping and developing a manner of living. And it's painful at a time."

In episode #76, Andrew shares how he always struggled with self-esteem and confidence. King Alcohol was his buddy. Today, God has a more central place in his life. 

In episode #75, Oliver shares how he came to Alcoholics Anonymous because he was beaten down by life. "I was really arrogant and really high. Until I lost everything. Drugs didn't work anymore." Oliver was hopeless. "Finding God has been the hardest battle of my life." 

In episode #74, Arline L. shares that in the middle of darkness, she heard "Start with you." What does that even mean? Soon after, she attended her first Big Book Awakening meeting in March 2022. Arline was resistant to faith until she believed everything would be turned around. "I really have to believe to see it later."

In episode #73, David M. Shares how the first Big Book he got was in 1987, but he never read it. David hit bottom in September 2017 after smashing into two cars on his way home. The driver of the second car asked him if he was drunk. He said yes. She said to go straight home and get sober. 

In episode #72, Jose G. shares how for the first five years of sobriety, his higher power was a door knob, and he was like a dry drunk. Then one day, a man at a twelve-step meeting invited Jose to Church. So Jose and his wife went to church. After three visits to Vineyard Church, he met with Pastor Charlie Brown and shared his story. After that meeting, his life was never the same because he gave...

In episode #71, Tom B. shares how a cat named Delilah got him sober. It was his wife's beautiful cat. One evening he got so drunk that he told his wife: "I am going to get my .22 and send that cat to God. I hear God calling you too." Next thing he members were three angles dressed in blue uniforms pulling him out of his bed and taking him down to jail.

In episode #70, Isaac shares how he was not a daily drinker like his sponsor. "I loved to binge on the weekend," Isaac questioned if he was an alcoholic because he didn't have the same story as others. Isaac believed he could set the drinking down after meeting his wife. Unfortunately, it didn't work like that. After a series of consequences from drinking, Isaac started asking himself: Why do I dr...

In episode 69, Michael shares Step 1: The Physical Craving. "What happens after I put a drink or drug into my body. Nothing to do with the 'Mental Obsession'. The physical craving, or 'the allergy' after I start drinking or using."

In episode #68, Vinny shares how not everyone is desperate. But in his own personal experience: "I can only help people that are desperate." Not everyone is willing to do what it takes to get sober, and stay sober forever.

In episode #67, Jose shares how drugs and alcohol took away his fears until he lost all hope. Then one day he asked for help and found refuge at the Salvation Army. 

In episode #66, Nancy H. shares how she had late-onset alcoholism. "It took me a full year to concede to my innermost self that I am an alcoholic." As soon as she quit drinking an eating disorder took off. The surrender to give up sugar was so much harder. "I see the evidence of my God working in my life."

In episode #65, Pat T. shares how sooner or later his sponsees ask...How do you get an intimate relationship with God? "I find that when you don't make God strange and you make him familiar like he were a best friend...people start warming up to the idea that they too can have a relationship with Him."

In episode #64, Brian S. shares how working with others requires meditation. Meditation in step 11 is a vital part of his life today. "Through the steps is how I gained access to a power greater than myself. It's kept me alive, sober, and restored me to sanity." In 2009, Brian was introduced to the Big Book Awakening, which opened up a new world for him after ten years in AA.

In episode #63, Jose G. shares how for many years he's always what's the difference between being happy and being joyful. And he never really got an answer until he began to experience what the difference is. Jose shares how freedom comes when we show up. "The freedom comes from coming here."

In episode #62, Luis shares how he hit bottom after he lost faith in his ability to fix his life and solve his drinking problem. "I reached the end of myself and realized I cannot do it by myself. Today, my faith is rooted in God's promises and what He has done in my life."

In episode #61, David M. shares how without Big Book Awakening "I never thought I would give up alcohol. Something in my mind was telling me you can't give up alcohol." In Step Six, David found the willingness to give up all his difficulties, resentments, and nightmares to God because he was a changed man.

In episode #60, Keith shares how he was taught by his dad that you drink when you celebrate; you drink when you are down; you drink when it's Christmas; no matter what it was that is what you did. "There are a lot of people in this that crave alcohol. And there are a lot of us that crave relief. I wanted to get relief from the stress of being an eighteen-year-old running the household."

In episode #59, Arline shares how she's always known that she was an alcoholic but didn't understand or see that her life was unmanageable.  "Because I continued to work and provide and keep everything afloat, I didn't feel I was unmanageable."

In episode #58, Adam M. shares the reason he picked "Constantly as the topic was because: "I am trying to myself that I need to work this program constantly." I really try to stay consistently consistent with my relationship with my higher power."As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer ru...

In episode #57, Oliver shares his favorite topic in the Big Book of AA: "There's a solution." Because today he is seeking a solution to live (not to quit drinking, but to live). "I had to exhaust everything I thought would make me healthy before I could accept this program."

In episode #56, Luis L. shares how he didn't know the word "Spirituality" when he first arrived to the twelve step rooms. But he soon discovered he was spiritually bankrupt. "I was a subject of King Alcohol, swept up in his mad realm." But just as A.A. promised, "my circumstances have steadily improved as my spiritual life grows and matures."