Beyond Broken Vows | Christian Marriage, Adultery, Pornography Addiction, Sexual Betrayal, Infidelity

Today we’ll be sharing a fantastic interview with Sathiya Sam, host of the Man Within podcast and the founder of Deep Clean . Sathiya opens up about his personal journey, including how he overcame a 15-year struggle with porn addiction, and the faith and guidance that played a key role in his recovery. He dives into some eye-opening differences between just being sober and truly experiencing freed...

After infidelity in marriage is discovered, many questions arise and decisions need to be made. Questions like:   Is this real?     How could this happen to me?   And one of the more frequently asked questions,   What do I do now?   Last week, in episode #88 , we told the story of our journey toward "making a decision and burning the ships".    Today, we follow up on our conversation from last wee...

Often in life, we come to a point where we need to make an important decision. A decision that could alter the trajectory of the rest of our lives. Yes, that kind of decision.    Have you had to make such decisions??    When it comes to recovering from sexual betrayal in marriage, these kinds of decisions can come up very soon after the discovery of adultery and then later on as rebuilding your ma...

Have you gotten to the point in your recovery journey from marital infidelity where you may be feeling the fatigue of endless questions, lack of trust, and having to talk about the pain every day and you’re asking yourself, "Can't we just get back to normal"?   What is normal?   What if "normal" got you to where you are today? Would you really want to go back?   Join us today as we outline the sho...

As we approach the end of 2024, we find ourselves reflecting on the past year of recovery. Was this last year anything that we hoped or imagined it would be? What went well? What missed the mark of our expectations? What could we have done differently?   These are all good questions to ask ourselves in light of the upcoming New Year.   Our recovery journey from porn-fueled infidelity and betrayal...

Are you looking for hope in what may seem to be a hopeless situation right now?   Merriam-Webster defines hope as "to expect with confidence".   During this Christmas season many of us are looking for hope. Hope that things will change for the better or maybe just hope that the pain of betrayal and the confusion of addiction will simply “go away”.   Friends, let me assure you that there is true ho...

Are you looking forward to celebrating Christmas this year? Or maybe for you, Christmastime has a dark shadow over it because of the discovery of sexual betrayal in your marriage and you’re wondering if it is ever going to get better.   We know how that feels! Several years ago, we faced the shocking reality of infidelity in our marriage, and it turned our Christmas into a painful blur. Before tha...

On today's show, we share our transformative journey from the deep struggles of pornography addiction and infidelity to healing and restoration. If you remember back on episode #75 , we had a guest on our show who gave us some incredible insights on how to Heal with God, from heavy things like sexual betrayal, shame and unforgiveness.   Heather O’Brien is the host of the podcast Heal with God, and...

Ladies, do you and your husband seem to be in a never-ending cycle of communication misfires? You ask him hard questions, he gives you answers, but you still aren’t connecting and moving forward.   Are you frustrated and confused by his responses, or lack thereof, leaving you with no confidence that he is telling the truth or that he sees your pain?   Today we address the challenges of rebuilding...

Ah, the holiday season! A time filled with twinkling lights, joyful gatherings, and, let's face it, a few emotional landmines for those who have been through the wringer with sexual betrayal. If the holiday cheer takes a nosedive because you discovered your partner’s unfaithfulness—whether it was last month, a year ago, or even two decades back—we totally get it.  It's completely natural for memor...

Making and apology to our betrayed spouse is one of the more important facets of our recovery process. However, have you had the experience when making an apology to your spouse, it seemed to cause more damage than give relief? So, what is the secret to a good apology and how can it be done with respect and honesty that can lead to true intimacy.   Since publishing episode #10, When “I’m Sorry” Is...

Have you ever lost something or had something taken away from you and you deeply felt the loss?   Or perhaps you gave something precious away that you now regret or grieve and want to get it back.   Would you be willing to travel a potentially painful path to have your loss restored?   The path of redemption can be challenging at best and painful at its worst. But what if the road less traveled br...

On this show, we have often talked about forgiveness - the need for extending forgiveness and how to walk out forgiveness. It has been in the context of forgiving your spouse for sexual betrayal, but what about the other woman? Or women? There are many different scenarios and every marriage has a unique story of brokenness. But there is a common thread of knowing there are those outside of your ma...

Have you ever found yourself in a situation that totally surprised you, leaving you unsure of how to react? It happens to all of us!   When we’re on the journey to recovering from sex addiction, those unexpected moments can be particularly challenging. It’s important to be aware and not let our guard down, as staying vigilant plays a crucial role in our recovery.   We’d love for you to join us tod...

When you hear the statement, "I do not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it". What thoughts and/or emotions surface immediately? Our experience has shown us that the initial reaction from a betrayed spouse will likely differ from that of the one who has broken faith. The former will react in a posture of, "You better regret your past!". And the latter will feel that they are “supposed t...

Have you ever wondered how to hear God speaking to you? When we have deep wounds such as betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues, we can feel desperate to hear the voice of God. We want him to tell us what to do to get relief from the ever-present pain and anxiety we are experiencing to find freedom and healing.   Today we are so excited to share our interview with Heather O’Brien host of the...

If you are listening to our podcast on a regular basis, and we hope you are, you are likely working hard to stay married after porn-fueled infidelity.   One challenging area that needs to be addressed in the recovery process is shame and guilt. Many times, shame and guilt are used interchangeably as though they are the same. Do you know there’s a difference? What are the differences?   Join us tod...

We know our story of sexual betrayal and recovery is not the only one out there, so we are excited to share with you a compelling conversation we had with Steve Shields from the Unashamed Unafraid podcast. He tells his unique and very personal story of how a Christian man trapped in porn addiction was able to come to terms with his powerlessness, and after several recovery setbacks, was finally ab...

We had planned to update and replay episodes all this month to help us take things a little slower for our anniversary. Well, we got of our 2 most popular shows out, but this week we decided to share some new content with you.   We want to give some encouragement and a little guidance to those of you who are struggling in the storm of your broken marriage. Whether you have been betrayed or you hav...

It's been almost a year and a half since we first told our stories of sexual addiction and betrayal on our podcast. A lot has happened since then!   We are so very grateful for the recovery, healing, and growth that both of us have experienced since D-Day in 2018. It has been due to God's help, tons of hard work on our part, and a great support community.   To commemorate our 37th wedding annivers...

September is our anniversary month and we're celebrating by taking a break from creating new episodes this month, but rather updating and replaying a few of our most popular episodes.    Today we are revisiting Episode #2 Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me, where Emily bares her soul to tell the story of Johnny's marital infidelity* fueled by pornography use. And although it was Not Her Fault in an...

Wives, do you have a desire for your husband to lead you and your family spiritually? Of course!   Husbands, are you at a loss for what that looks like and how you can show up for your wife in this area? Yeah, probably.   Unfortunately, in many Christian marriages, this is often a reality. A wife will take up the responsibility of being the spiritual head of the home because her husband isn’t step...

Wives, are you trying to communicate your feelings to your husband and somehow it always ends up being about him. Are just not feeling seen, heard and validated?   Men, is your wife explaining to you how she feels or coming at you with big emotions and you find yourself at a loss of how to respond?   This can happen in any marriage, but when sexual betrayal is a reality, the pain and frustration s...

How much do you value keeping your word? And how does it make you feel when someone doesn't keep their word?   For a betrayed wife, it becomes even more important that her recovering husband keep his word. This new display of reliability provides the safety and security that she desperately needs in a time of confusion and broken trust. When he makes the effort to follow through on his promises, h...

We all have priorities, whether we make them intentionally or they exist by default. At times our priorities can be misguided and cause pain for ourselves and for others. We also understand that priorities are important and it’s necessary to have them in the right order.   And for a betrayed wife, it’s imperative to know that she is a priority to her husband.   Today as we continue in our series,...