Better Sex

Sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman interviews Jeremy Lipkowitz about porn addiction (or compulsive/problematic porn use) through a Buddhist-informed lens that frames addiction as using rewarding behaviors to escape or numb unpleasant emotions. Jeremy shares his own history of escalating porn use from childhood into college and describes subtle harms including impacts on intimacy, bedroom functioning, p...

Sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman answers a listener question about what to do when both partners have low desire for sex. She explains that if both people are happy not having sex, there is no problem to solve. If the couple wants sex to be part of their relationship but neither experiences spontaneous desire or initiates, she recommends understanding and working with reactive desire—where interest m...

Sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman hosts Dr. Jennifer Berman to discuss menopause, sexual health, and individualized hormone care. Berman explains how witnessing the medical disparity after Viagra’s rise pushed her to pioneer women’s sexual health, and how her own early perimenopause shaped her work with hormone replacement therapy (HRT). They address common menopause symptoms and argue sexual health i...

Sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman shares a “soapbox” episode addressing a common belief among lower desire partners: “I can’t win; it’ll never be enough.” She explains this mindset becomes self-defeating when the goalposts are set by the higher desire partner’s satisfaction instead of treating intimacy as a shared playing field where both meet in the middle. Zimmerman outlines the lower desire partner...

Sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman interviews Heather Howard, a sexuality counselor and financial coach, about the strong parallels between money and sex in couples’ relationships. Howard shares how pelvic pain shifted her from a finance career into sex counseling and later into financial coaching after repeatedly seeing money conflicts fueling distance, resentment, and desire problems. They discuss pa...

In a soapbox episode, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman responds to an email from a listener whose wife says she isn’t interested in fixing their sex life and accuses him of only caring about sex. Jessa explains there can still be hope and outlines three areas to explore: the overall relationship (conflict, lack of emotional connection, feeling like roommates), the couple’s entrenched desire-differenc...

Sex therapist Jess Zimmerman interviews biohacker and author Jay Campbell about hormone optimization and metabolic health as foundations for wellbeing, longevity, libido, and sexual function. Campbell shares how discovering very low testosterone after a sports injury led him into researching therapeutic hormones, peptides, and lifestyle interventions, eventually writing bestselling books and a new...

Sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman shares a soapbox episode on three common apology mistakes that prevent real relationship repair. First, apologizing too quickly can skip the empathy your partner needs to feel understood, so she encourages “climbing into their movie” before taking accountability. Second, phrases like “I’m sorry you feel that way” or “I’m sorry that happened to you” misuse “I’m sorry,”...

Sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman interviews Darshana Avila (featured on Netflix’s Sex, Love & Goop) about “erotic wholeness,” defined as integrating all parts of ourselves and relating to eroticism as life-force vitality that can fuel sexuality, creativity, and relationships. They explore how people-pleasing functions as a protective strategy—suppressing authenticity to maintain connection—and ho...

In this soapbox episode of The Better Sex Podcast, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the power of staying positive by questioning the stories and interpretations our brains create. She explains how people often react to filtered, meaning-filled perceptions rather than reality, then reinforce negative narratives—especially in relationships—by focusing on blame, hopelessness, and how stuck thi...

Sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman interviews Mandy Salley of the Woodhull Foundation about sexual freedom as a human right rooted in bodily autonomy and the ability to say yes or no. Mandy shares how peer sex education in college, graduate training in social work and human sexuality, and years volunteering with Woodhull led to her advocacy work blending sexuality, policy, and activism. They discuss ho...

In this soapbox episode of the Better Sex Podcast, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman explains why some couples may benefit from a couples intensive instead of weekly or biweekly therapy. She describes limits of short, spaced-out sessions—often spent catching up or addressing the latest conflict—and how real emotional breakthroughs can require uninterrupted time for nervous systems to settle, vulnerabi...

Jessa Zimmerman interviews Jillian Wisborg, founder of Booby Grow, about a natural breast growth and firming program combining herbal supplementation, breast/nipple massage, and nutrition changes. Jillian shares that she created the program after losing weight and losing breast volume, and wanted an alternative to implants due to cost, maintenance, and reported health issues. She explains her back...

In this soapbox episode of The Better Sex Podcast, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman responds to a coaching-call question: whether to tell a partner when you’ve taken Viagra. She describes a client who has a prescription, experiences no negative side effects, and has been taking the medication without telling his wife to avoid creating pressure or expectations for sex. Jessa explains that Viagra helps...

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman speaks with Candace Sjogren about the intricacies and common mistakes involved in polyamory, as addressed in Sjogren’s book, 'Polyagony'. They discuss personal experiences, motivations behind polyamorous relationships, and essential strategies for maintaining healthy open relationships. The conversation touches on setting boundaries,...

In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the challenges of setting quotas for sexual frequency in relationships. She shares insights from a recent coaching call, emphasizing that focusing on frequency can often lead to feelings of obligation and resentment, particularly for lower desire partners. Instead, Jessa advises couples to create flexible,...

In this episode of Better Sex, host and sex therapist, Jessa Zimmerman, interviews Dr. Evan Goldstein, an expert in anal sexual wellness and author of 'Butt Seriously.' Dr. Goldstein discusses the fundamentals of anal sex for beginners, focusing on key aspects such as muscle relaxation, preparation, and safety. They delve into common myths around anal sex, the anatomical considerations, and the im...

In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, hosted by sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman, the focus is on the concept of love languages and their impact on intimate relationships. Zimmerman discusses the common misunderstanding that having 'touch' as a love language equates to a need for sex, and how this misconception can create pressure and resistance in relationships. She emphasizes the importance of...

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, hosted by sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman, guest Joan Price discusses her book 'Sex After Grief.' Joan shares her personal journey of rekindling her sexual life after the loss of her beloved Robert. She emphasizes the unique timeline every individual experiences in returning to sexual pleasure post-grief and addresses common challenges, such as the misconce...

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman explores the common misunderstanding surrounding lower desire partners in relationships. She discusses how a lack of evident effort towards sexual intimacy problems is often misinterpreted as indifference. Jessa explains that it's more about a lack of hope and feeling stuck rather than a lack of care. The episode provides ins...

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman welcomes Junvi Ola, who shares her personal story of overcoming vaginismus, a condition that prevented her from having intercourse until the age of 36. Junvi discusses her journey, which included working with a sex therapist, using dilators, and eventually hiring a surrogate partner. The episode provides insights and inspiration for t...

In this soapbox episode of 'The Better Sex Podcast,' sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman emphasizes the importance of talking about sex more openly. Jessa explores the cultural taboo surrounding discussions about sex and how it leads to feelings of isolation and shame. Sharing her personal experiences and observations, she highlights the common struggles couples face and encourages listeners to initiate...

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman is joined by psychiatrist Dr. Hector Rodriguez to discuss the effects of trauma on sexual desire, libido, pleasure, and satisfaction. Dr. Rodriguez shares insights on how trauma can impact intimate relationships and how the brain can be rewired to facilitate healing and enjoyment of sex. He dives into the role of dopamine and oxytocin...

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman discusses the common issue of differences in sexual desire among couples. She emphasizes the importance of open communication and partnership when addressing this issue, rather than resorting to quick fixes like CBD gummies or sex toys without mutual consent. Jessa explains why these well-intentioned solutions often backfire and are p...

In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman interviews Dr. Jacquie Del Rosario about the invasive impact of technology on relationships. They discuss how excessive screen time can weaken intimacy and emotional connections, and how couples can set boundaries to deepen their face-to-face interactions. Dr. Del Rosario shares insights on how technology has altered dating and wooing...