Below The Circle

You can be loyal and still feel lost. Faithful but unfulfilled. Stuck in something that once felt right—but now just feels heavy. In today’s episode, Dr. Phyllis is talking about the quiet discomfort of staying in a role, relationship, or responsibility that no longer fits. When your “yes” begins to drain you instead of energize you, it may be time to pause and ask: Is this still aligned with what...

Have you ever felt completely drained—even while doing everything “right”? You’re showing up, checking all the boxes, and still feel off. Dr. Phyllis calls this what it is: depletion. But depletion doesn’t always come from doing too much. It often comes from giving too much to the wrong things. We slowly get pulled into other people’s priorities, needs, and timelines—sometimes without even realizi...

You’re the hero in everyone else’s story… but somewhere along the way, you became a ghost in your own. In today’s episode, Dr. Phyllis is sharing a message that so many women need but rarely give themselves permission to hear: You are allowed to matter in your own life. When you spend your days caring for everyone else—your family, your team, your friends, your community—it’s easy to forget that y...

Dr. Phyllis speaks to the woman who’s craving real connection but feels guarded after being let down, overlooked, or even wounded by past friendships. When trust has been broken, it takes courage to open up again. But staying isolated only deepens the ache. Dr. Phyllis invites listeners to look honestly at their relationships and ask: Who is in my inner circle? Are these friendships rooted in fait...

Presence doesn’t show up on its own—we have to create it. That’s something Dr. Phyllis knows deeply, both personally and professionally. In this episode, she shares why making presence a daily priority is one of the most powerful shifts we can make in our lives. For a long time, Dr. Phyllis was going through the motions. Life felt like a loop—autopilot routines, passive days, and that quiet questi...

Guilt can be subtle, but its impact is heavy. It clouds discernment, distorts priorities, and often pushes people into cycles of overdoing. It convinces high-achieving women that more effort means more value. But God never asked for hustle. He asked for trust. Dr. Phyllis reminds us: Presence begins where guilt ends. Letting go of what God didn’t assign makes space for peace, clarity, and joy. Tru...

“Let it go.” “Shake it off.” “Don’t let what they said get to you.” We’ve all heard these lines. Maybe we’ve even said them to ourselves. But what happens when the words don’t bounce off? When they actually stick—and quietly start shaping how we see ourselves? Dr. Phyllis unpacks the unspoken agreements we make with hurtful words. The ones we don’t even realize we’ve internalized. Maybe someone at...

When Dr. Phyllis started this podcast, she didn’t have all the answers or perfect timing. What she had was a tug on her heart—a quiet knowing it was time to begin, even without feeling fully ready. Now, after 90 episodes, one truth stands out: progress begins before perfection. Many believe they must wait until everything is perfect. But showing up in the mess moves you forward. Dr. Phyllis’s jour...

For so many of us, there's this constant push to perform. You can be doing all the things —leading, achieving, producing—and still feel like it’s never enough. Dr. Phyllis knows that tension well. There was a season where she didn’t just do the work… she became the work. The roles, the pressure, the nonstop motion—it all got tangled up in her identity. Slowing down felt dangerous. Like if she paus...

You’ve heard it all when it comes to self-care: grab a coffee, get a massage, sip some tea. But Dr. Phyllis realized something important—real self-care isn’t something you schedule. It’s something you reclaim. For a long time, self-care felt impossible to fit in. She was running from one thing to the next, barely catching her breath. And when she did squeeze in a moment for herself, it often felt...

What if your strength has become your silence? For a long time, Dr. Phyllis felt proud when people called her resilient. The more praise she got, the better she felt about herself. She thought she was stacking value and worth in the eyes of others. Her resilience became her identity, and external validation became her measure of success.  But resilience doesn’t mean you ignore your feelings....

It’s Mental Health Awareness Month, and this is the part we often skip over. The unseen. The unspoken. The quiet unraveling that happens when you stay in motion too long, carry too much, and check in on everyone but yourself. Dr. Phyllis has been on that treadmill. She’s run herself into the ground trying to hold it all together. And she knows firsthand: looking like you have it together doesn’t m...

You know those emails marked time-sensitive? The ones that make you pause and pay attention? Consider this your version of that—but instead of a deadline or a task, it’s an invitation. An inner nudge from the part of you that’s quietly asking to be seen. Dr. Phyllis knows this feeling all too well. There was a season in her life where she was constantly overcommitted, always doing, always chasing—...

There are seasons when life feels like it’s asking a bigger question—one that can’t be ignored or brushed aside. In these moments, there’s often a crossroads: one path is known, predictable, and familiar. The other carries the weight of uncertainty but also the possibility of something more. Today’s episode explores that very moment—what Dr. Phyllis calls “the crossroads of yes.” It’s the space wh...

How Are You Really Doing? It’s a small question. One we often toss into conversation without pausing to hear the answer. But when asked with intention, How are you really doing? becomes a powerful invitation to pause, reflect, and move toward deeper emotional honesty. Dr. Phyllis has spent years making this question part of her regular rhythm—with friends, family, clients, and even herself. Not ju...

“Why me?” “Why now?” We’ve all had seasons where those questions take over. The conversations play on repeat. The decisions get rehashed. And somehow, we convince ourselves that if we could just figure out why , we’d finally feel peace. But here’s what Dr. Phyllis gently reminds us: You don’t have to know why to move forward. You just have to trust that forward is still possible. That shift—from w...

It’s easy to catch a glimpse of ourselves in the mirror or in a photo and immediately start picking apart every detail. The way our clothes fit, the shape of our body, the expression on our face—we find flaws before we find anything to celebrate. And then, without realizing it, we start believing that the mirror defines us. Dr. Phyllis is here to challenge that mindset. She reminds us that our val...

Dr. Phyllis used to struggle with being transparent, vulnerable, or truly authentic. In her mind, admitting that something hurt or disappointed her felt like exposing weakness. Saying it out loud made it real, and that was scary. So she kept things to herself, believing that staying silent was the strong thing to do. But over time, she realized that holding it all in wasn’t strength—it was keeping...

For years, Dr. Phyllis believed her worth was tied to the roles she filled. She chased perfection, sought external validation, and measured success by what she accomplished. But standing at her retirement party, reflecting on a lifetime of experiences, she shared a truth that had reshaped her journey—relationships matter more than roles. The titles, the responsibilities, the endless striving—it wa...

Your mind is always racing. You’re constantly in fix-it mode, solving problems before they happen. Always preparing, always anticipating. You tell yourself that if you stay ahead, you can avoid the crisis. But in reality, you’re just living on edge—trying to control every detail, yet feeling more disconnected than ever. It’s stressful, isn’t it? Your nervous system is on high alert. You get into c...

Is burnout due to stress or ego? We often think of burnout as a response to external pressures—work, family, volunteering—but it’s more than just stress. Compassion fatigue happens when we give and give without refueling, leaving us empty. And autopilot living kicks in when we keep pushing through the exhaustion, ignoring the signs until we hit a wall. But here's the real question: Is burnout driv...

Have you ever caught yourself going through the motions, only to stop and wonder—did I even lock the door? You drove the usual route, did the usual tasks, had the usual conversations, but none of it fully registered. It all feels like one big blur.  That’s auto-pilot living. Your body is present, but your mind is somewhere else. You’re not engaged in the moment, and over time, life starts to...

Life is full of twists and turns, unexpected transitions, and moments that make us question if we’re heading in the right direction. But what if every step, every change, and even every detour is part of God’s plan? What if instead of seeing these shifts as mistakes, we saw them as stepping stones leading us toward alignment with His purpose? This journey isn’t about standing still or forcing your...

Somebody is going to lose the game. That’s just how it works. One team walks away with the win, the other with a loss. And just like in football, life presents us with choices—plays we think will move us forward, decisions that look good on paper. But what happens when both options seem right? When saying yes feels like the obvious next move, but deep down, we’re unsure? Not every opportunity is m...

Transitions can feel uncertain. Even when change is necessary or positive, it often stirs a mix of emotions. But embracing these sacred shifts allows us to grow, discover deeper purpose, and align with God’s calling. Dr. Phyllis shares her personal journey as she steps away from decades of service in medicine into a new chapter. Drawing wisdom from Luke 10 and the story of Martha and Mary, she enc...