Being there for your kids

All kids act out. It's one way that they explore their world, assert themselves, and nurture their natural curiosity. However, there are three kinds of acting out that create difficulties both for you as the parent as well as for your child. Check out this podcast to learn more.

Have you ever had your child jerk your chain so hard that you couldn't wait to give them a piece of your mind (or maybe THE BELT)? What parent hasn't? Today I have such an example. However, I put the example in context as a learning experience for your child. Making your child into a "mini-me" is not the goal of parenting. While our kids are the best and the worst of both of their parents, first a...

As parents, we all are hard-wired to fix things, problem-solve, kiss the boo-boo. That is sufficient most of the time. But what about when your child is in an emotional meltdown? That's when he needs your compassion. Help him to weather the emotional storm before trying to make things better. This way, you give him the tools to right his own ship when he's grown and you're not always there anymore...

Families have drama all the time. It comes in all shapes and sizes. How you handle the drama in your house sets the tone for all others living there. I've given three examples, the wrong ways to handle them, and a sample of healthier ways to handle them. Make sense? If you want to share your drama with me, contact me at www.thereformykids.com.

Every parent has a superpower, but often it goes unused. When things are great at home, at work, with your kids, well, life doesn't get much better than that. When things are not so great, that's the time to invoke your superpower. Resilience is your superpower. In this column, I explain all the facets of resilience and give an example of mom using resilience to recapture equilibrium. Check it out...

Are you an "Ella?" She's a young mom caught up in a life she can't seem to escape. She has spent all of it preparing to die. In my brief article, I share the differences between preparing to die and preparing to live. Some minimal lifestyle changes can make a world of difference. Blessings, Jon

Home stretching the school year. Time to get summer plans started. In the first letter, mom frets over summer expenses, kids' activities, and not getting enough me-time. Planning ahead and delegating, with accountability, works wonders. In the second letter, mom is all over an upcoming residential move ruining summer fun activities. I encourage planning for both/and, rather than either/or. Familie...

Even though the pandemic is mostly behind us, some families are still reeling from its effects. My first letter asks about using family planning meetings to plan for summer activites. I encourage full participation, using active listening and problem solving to create a great, fun summer for all. A mom writes me in the second letter feeling overwhelmed with kid activities and bemoaning no  time fo...

Stuff happens. Even bad stuff can happen. How you all respond to it helps define the kind of family you are. In my response to the first letter, I help a mom sort out ways to help her younger son deal with tragedy that befell her older son. In my response to the second letter, mom is befuddled as to why her 5-year-old has migraine headaches and how to deal with them. Feeling a kindred spirit? Chec...

Showing interest and involvement in your child's schooling is a blessing of good parenting. Where she might be having difficulties, it can be helpful for you to supplement her classes with schooling at home. The one-on-one attention you give her can help her catch up, become more interested, and enrich her potential. Emily Graham, a "mighty mom" indeed, offers suggestions for maximizing your child...

Danger lurks and tragedy can occur in a nanosecond. Being aware of some statistics regarding child safety will help you focus on prevention. Know the potential dangers and take the appropriate precautions. Check out the quicklink references for more information.

Bullying is a pervasive phenomenon, particularly in schools, but also with adults in their workplace. Wearing glasses can be a trigger for being bullied. Nvision provides this article on the topic, and I'm happy to share it with you.

Very few families get by on one income these days. It takes two incomes to make expenses in most homes. That means someone, even both of you, will be juggling home, work, and kids. Mastering the baby balance takes some effort. Check out this podcast to find some ways to keep things in balance.

A "mompreneur" is the best mom combined with the best entrepreneur. Creating an in-home business can be challenging, but also rewarding. It can be a whole family endeavor that creates teachable moments and connectedness. Here are some thoughts by guest columnist Emily Graham to help you get started

Our guest contributor has great tips for saving money. Check it out.

How can you both corral the kids, but also get them to be helpful and useful during stress-filled holidays and moving days. These two letters tackle this question to help frazzled parents get through family transitions and difficult times. Check them out.

Holidays can be chaotic, with kids home from school for chunks of time. Beginning with a family meeting, these times can be fun for everybody. Getting everyone involved from planning to completion is the ticket to having holidays go well for your family. In my second letter, mom is having a pity party about not having "me-time." I helped her distinguish between selfish and self-caring. Getting "me...

Transitions of any kind are stressful. Moving your family into a rental can be the worst! The following article comes from contributing podcaster Cheryl Conklin. Check her work out at https://wellnesscentral.info/  Great stuff!!

Families aren't supposed to be win/lose propositions. We need to build them to be win/win for all members. Making family plans for the summer can be taxing and stressful, where one or more family members feel left out. Enter the family planning meeting. This process gives everybody voice. The first letter addresses this. In the second letter, mom fears not getting her own needs met. I encourage he...

This pandemic has taken its toll on all of us. While things are much better, we're not there yet. How can you be there for your kids and for others in these tough times? The first letter is from grandparents who want to be active again. I counsel, go, but go slowly and with safeguards in place. A mom writes me about her son's best friend who is very ill from this pandemic. While encouraging her so...

Summer is almost here. Kids almost out of school. What to do? What to do? A mom shares her frustrations and worries about planning amidst pandemic and world crises. Active listening is the tool to use to help calm your kids down. After you have their attention, use brainstorming techniques to open up a family planning meeting. Any and all options are on the table, within family time and money cons...

Tragedy can befall any family at any time. In the first letter, mom wants help not with her elder son who is quadriplegic, but rather with her younger son, whom she fears will be left out. There's a place for all in the family, no matter what the trauma. In the second letter, how could a sweet, adorable, little 5-yr old girl suffer from migraine headaches. Mom is fraught with worry and concern. I...

Parenting a special needs child is challenging under any circumstances. Add COVID-19 and the situation compounds. This podcast is not letters, my usual format, but rather an article sent to me that I'm passing on to you. Take heart. You can both self-care and tend to your special needs child.

What to do when one of your kids embraces the awe of Santa Claus, and her older brother intends to burst her bubble by saying that Santa is "not real?" As parents, we are to respect our children's developmental stages and convictions, while guiding them away from power plays. Also, how do we keep the family and spiritual side of Christmas alive in our family? In the second letter, mom is frustrate...

Stuff happens. As parents, we are charged with helping our kids when stuff happens. In our first letter, mom asks about psychosomatic tummy aches her 6 year old daughter is having. Yes, psychosomatic illness is real, not "all in your head." I give her some hints for easing her daughter's pain. In our second letter, mom wants help with her middle schooler having to wear an eye patch the rest of the...