Babe Patrol

Steph joins the babes again this week to discuss the results of their Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator tests. Turns out Steph & Ashley are twinsies, and rare af. Also, it turns out that all of them--Steph, Lauren, and Ashley--were basically defense lawyers as children. They gossip about Ashley's landlords and make up a completely ridiculous story with absolutely baseless claims, and Lauren bri...

If there is one thing for sure, Steph George hates space. But thankfully, she loves us, and she loves a fair bit of eavesdropping. Today Steph joins Lauren & Ashley for Pizza Ennui Night and shares a killer train eavesdropping story, which includes a little internet sleuthing interlude, and an accidental dragging of JJill. Ashley dusts off her press credentials and brings us a little bicoastal...

Lauren & Ashley have returned to snap sh!t on America's aristocrats this week. They drop some busybody gossip about a McMansion visit gone wacky, and Lauren takes us to the CraigsList Activity Partners section for nine innings. We try a little TikTok trend that is supposed to tell us the type of men we like (spoiler alert: gray sweatpants come up). We discuss the intricacies of egg salad vs ch...

Lauren takes us on a hero's journey of perfume and gossips about a warhead, which leaves Ashley wondering a particularly seminal question: "what IS terminal c*m, anyway?" Ashley reads from her teen journal--a list of her teenage self's Perfect Man (spoiler alert, it's a shero's journey) and gossips about a shocking Instagram caption that blew the mind of a busybody. We talk about hot UPS men, the...

When is it too soon to ask if you're going to eat your pickle? This, and other questions for the ages come up in today's episode. Ashley & Lauren gossip about some wild busybody-supplied 23 & Me gossip, and Lauren introduces us to some truly verbose, loquacious, pleonastic, well....WORDY local copywriting. Ashley nearly weeps over the Chinese spy balloon, we discuss aerial phenomena and "s...

On today's episode, we welcome the absolute delight: Rob Loucks! Rob is an artist, DJ, cloud enthusiast, and very bad hockey player. He's currently living in Boise, ID where he has been desperately trying to learn how to make incense from tree sap, and tame his anxiety. He gossips with us about the Idaho bumper sticker scene, a sexting situation that made Ashley gag, and a multi-decade MYSTERY NOT...

It's time to celebrate V-day busybodies, and no matter your relaysh status, we're here to heat your seats and take this party from romance dry to, in Ashley's words, Romance Wet™. In this special edition episode, we step outside our usual format and slip-slide through some Valentine's Day fun. Let us moisten your ear holes with tender moments involving love matches delivered via rudimentary hetero...

One time Lauren saw a guy in a pair of Pit Vipers and called them "a full facial windshield mirrored joe dirt situation." And that one time was in this episode! Today we're gossiping about an incident in a bagel shop and the ins and outs of bathroom door etiquette, and Lauren teaches Ashley about Chat GPT, who is a TOTAL BORE who DOESN'T GOSSIP. We discuss objects that look like sex toys but aren'...

We recorded this after 10pm, so buckle up, because it's loose, babyyyy. We gossip about Ashley's favorite weekend spot: The Laundromat, and Lauren talks about historically weird musical instrument, the Glass Armonica. We ask ourselves about emojis as punctuation and crypto as a red flag, and talk about an entire website a man built for dating, a local earthquake, and Ashley's competency kink. Tang...

Jeeez, they let us make 10 of these?? For our illustrious 10th episode we recorded **After Dark**, and Ashley was over-caffeinated, so consider listening at .5 speed. We gossip about a backwoods doomsday prepper & DNA surprises. Ashley simply passes out over a smokeshow of a profile that Lauren found on OKCupid, and we discuss dating out of your attractiveness range and whether that is real? W...

What's your New Year's *iNtEnTiOn,* busybodies? Ashley & Lauren discuss theirs while potentially editing all of the intentions down to: ORGASMS 2023. Small gossips include a car/bridge/laundromat episode & a surprising fact about Celine Dion. We roast a few men who were rude online, including a man Ashley describes as a "potato carving of Quasimodo" after admitting she sort of looks like h...

Helloooooo and welcome to another episode of Tangent Patrol! Ashley shares a piece of deeply relatable gossip from a busybody about social terror in a local small business, Lauren shares a "tragic" pie plate story, and then we bring in our first guest!! Steph George, our fearless producer, hops on the mic to join us in a discussion of her own history of gossip, and to break down a couple of solid...

Today, busybodies, Ashley tells another gruesome story, while Lauren tells a charming local one about Santa. We delve into a wild Craigslist lobersterman personal ad who describes to us "where my safe place is" (yikes) and a kitchen surprise. Notable tangents include: our upcoming FUNDRAISING RACE: The Stoner to Boner 3K!!! Start training!!; the charm of a good highway information booth, Glad Brad...

The church bell chimed 'til it rang twenty-nine times / for each man on the Edmund Fitzgeraaaaald!!! A little Piscataqua River historical gossip comes to you today, fresh off the old Middle Bridge, as well as a juicy morsel from one of Lauren's coworkers. We talk about DM slippage, sh!tting your pants on a date, the panty-dissolving quality of good conversation, and the perks of "Magazine Zero." T...

Grab your dELia*s cardigans, busybodies, because Ashley brings Lauren back to high school (shudder) with some vintage Presidential gossip from the early days of the Internet, & Lauren finds us a 2-for-1 special for the booklover of your dreams. Notable tangents include REALity and filters, our love for Gen Z, Barnacle Billy's rum punches, The (beloved) Black Bean (RIP), vagina dentata, & m...

An integral part of being a busybody is the willingness to eavesdrop, and this week we fight children and the cacophonous sea to overhear some beach gossip & recreate it in a Choose Your Own Adventure style. Lauren introduces some Reddit tales that shock the senses, and we discuss chain restaurants, Rae Dunn, the greatest tattoo in the history of the world, finding the Pam to one's Jim, and Sk...

This week, busybodies, we clop over to a dude's house and interrupt him while he's laying sod in order to get the beef in the neighb. And we discuss some gossip on the town Facebook page that was shared by the ice cream parlor. We talk about gossip as a political tool, Lauren's liberal use of exclamation points to fool the patriarchy, the hotness of John Goodman, friendships between men, and final...

How many dead bodies have you kissed, anyway? In this week's episode, we share some Irish Catholic funeral goss, and take you on an aural "Mr. Toad's Wild Ride" of tantalizing tangents: social mores around kissing a dead body (or as producer, Steph, lovingly refers to it: "the final kiss"), Hare Krishna chanting, Ashley's first vibrator, Twin Peaks, Babe Patrol's Official Cookie, and the perils of...

Welcome to Babe Patrol--a podcast about...well, you'll see. For our fledgling episode, we’re bringing you into our world, but mostly stumbling around as we do it.  We have gossip about a secret relationship at work, a CELEBRITY in Portsmouth, and multiple dating profiles we gently dissect. Notable tangents include VH1’s The Pickup Artist, the Free-Stater Movement in NH, Chris Maloni? Maroni?...

Babe Patrol--a podcast about low-stakes gossip & modern dating from your pals Lauren Audet & Ashley Bliss. Episodes drop every Tuesday, starting next week 11/22/22!