Asshole Animals, with Alice

If you grew up in the 80s or 90s, you'll remember how much of an effect Hogamania had on young minds, the music, the violence, the smashing of chairs on someone's back...oh wait...okay, sorry guys - I might have meant HULKAMANIA. My bad. But! You can't spell Hulk Hogan without "hog". With Alice today to talk all things hog is the fabulous Vinny Thomas, who joins her to discus...

Are you a millenial with a slightly nihilistic take on life? Can't afford kids but bored of gaming and doom-scrolling on Hinge? Why not take up birdwatching? If you're over 30 and wanted to feel a semblance of excitement towards something that isn't generated by pixels on a screen, birdwatching is the hobby for you! Comedian and bird-acknowledger, Max St John, comes on this episode to...

Deep in the Eucalyptus forests of Australia, a fluffy grey creature dozes peacefully in the nook of a branch, blissfully unaware that across the world, a Zookeeper and amateur comedienne is determined to get to the bottom of whether or not Koalas are "assholes" or not. Thankfully for the small-brained Koala, they never will know. And you're not going to tell them...right? Joining Ali...

Alright, so we may need to up our PR budget for this one...NO ONE is protesting on the side of Ticks. They are bitey, blood-sucky, gross-looking little creatures that look like they belong in a sci-fi movie...or are they? It just so happens that we managed to find an expert willing to put his reputation on the line to defend the tiny Tick - vet, conservationist and hilarious human Dr Sean McCormac...

What do you think you know about Iguanas? That they're big ol' Lizards that hang around Florida? That they make great emotional support pets for lonely spinsters? (Shout-out to Jub-Jub from "The Simpsons"). What if we told you that Iguanas are some of the most diversely located reptiles on Earth? What if we told you that they have the quiet dignitas of an animal that's achiev...

It's difficult not to be jealous of Eagles, isn't it? Their giant wingspan, their majesty in the air, the gasps of wonder that follow them wherever they fly. The awe they strike upon us by simply existing in our skies is something to behold. And yet here we are - talking White-Tailed Eagles today... On the show to talk about his relationship with these majestic birds and to discuss his new...

We've really shot ourselves in the foot with this one, haven't we? What possible asshole-rating could Alice give to man's closest animal companion? The Scooby to our Shaggy? The Gromit to our Wallace? The Hachiko to our...whoever Hachiko's owner was? We brought out the big guns for this one. Anthrozoologist Hal Herzog - who studies the relationship between Humans and Dogs, joins Al...

If you're a Millenial, then chances are you grew up watching The Rescuers, so are somewhat traumatised by Gators, having watched young orphan Penny be tormented by Madame Medusa and her two, thicc pet alligators. But, this is reality, so we have important questions to address, the most pertinent being: "Are Gators actually assholes?", and to help Alice answer that question, we brough...

Quick fire: what carnivore found in both Africa AND Asia is a highly intelligent, highly successful apex predator with a complex social structure? If you said Lions, then you are DEAD wrong, idiot. Today we're talking about one of the most badass animals that you probably don't know too much about (or what you DO know is incorrect...thanks, Disney ) . Standing with Alice to present the bes...

What do you think of when you think of an Emu? Dark, sweeping hair? Eyeliner? Lip piercings? Well, I hate to blow your minds, but you're actually thinking of Emos, you absolute spoon. Far less moody and listening to way less My Chemical Romance is the humble Emu, native to the chaotic Australia. Emus are tall, curious and make EXCELLENT Dads, so why are they on this podcast today? Joining Alic...

Okay, okay. We know we're going to have to work overtime on this one, because this is a hard sell. Yes, Rats carry diseases, cause damage, eat food that doesn't belong to them and MAYBE most people are weirdly creeped out by their tail. But they are also smart, compassionate and determined individuals, so maybe you should shut the hell up. Here to give Rats some positive PR is the incredib...

It's hard to imagine that Alice would be poking fun at a bird with iridescent feathers, a beautiful flight pattern, and whose name LITERALLY means "little star", but here we are. It was hard to imagine that Donald Trump would turn out to be a wannabe Dictator....crazier things have happened in this timeline. Here to discuss one of Britain's most under-the-radar birds is celebrated author, TV produ...

Side note before we get started: does anyone else remember Cadbury's "Taz"s? The chocolate bar? The one that was kind of like a Freddo but had caramel inside? What ever HAPPENED to those? In any case, Tasmanian Devils are definitely one of those creatures that the general public knows little about, other than through the portrayal of a beloved yet crazed cartoon lunatic. Could you even DRAW a Tasm...

Quick question: how much do you know about Slug penises? Not very much? Well, that's SUPER embarrassing for you...Thankfully, Yussef Rafik (children's TV presenter/zoologist/slug enthusiast) is here to tell you all you need to know about Slugs (genitalia and otherwise). The human experience with Slugs can probably be best described as one of "disgust", right? No one is happy to s...

You've got to hand it to Elephants - for an animal THAT large, they've managed to invoke a range of emotions in us pretty well. Whether you were moved to tears by Dumbo, terrified of the Heffalumps in Winnie the Pooh or laughing at Stampy, Bart's Elephant from the Simpsons - us humans have a special kinship with these large creatures and it's about time we explored that... Here to...

We all love a good crossover episode, right? Jetsons meet the Flintstones, Family Guy vs The Simpsons, Angel and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Well, all of those crossovers PALE in comparison to the shenanigans brought by the teams at "How Many Geese?" and "Asshole Animals with Alice"... Join Jack, Roddy and Alice as they set their differences aside to crown the "Worst Bird in...

Are you a certified bird nerd? Does birding in the great outdoors, come rain or shine, tickle your fancy? Are you looking to meet other bird people, while hearing about the incredible things people out there are doing to protect and preserve our winged friends? Then Global Birdfair is the place for you! It is bird lover's Mecca. It is the congregation of those who love to see nature thriving....

Signs that you might be a Kookaburra: - You love to laugh <3 - You're close with your family - You like to keep it simple with decorating your home, instead of making your nesting complex - You're a great partner to your significant other - You can be a jerk at times Kookaburras MAY just be the animal embodiment of "Live, Laugh, Love" - with close family bonds, being excellent...

We, as humans, DO love to use animal names as insults, don't we? You might call your cheating ex boyfriend a "dog", you might call someone going to the police a "rat". Hell, you may even go as far as to call people who support Trump "sheep". It's called speciesism - look it up. Among those brutish insult-names, is the humble Snake, which is what you might call...

Growing up, your first experience with a Coyote quite possibly may have been watching a cartoon Coyote attempt, in vain, to catch and eat a cartoon Roadrunner. What if we told you that while you're rooting for the Roadrunner as a kid, as an adult you're probably identifying more with the Coyote? With Alice this week is YouTuber, wildlife expert and all-around badass Coyote Peterson, to tel...

The term "Bear" can evoke a number of feelings depending on the context. If you're an avid hiker, hearing the word "bear" may induce a sense of sheer terror. When coupled with the word "hug", the term "bear" might be a source of comfort, especially when you need an extra-strong source of affection. If you love burly, hairy men, then "bear" may...

It's difficult to imagine a more intense rivalry than Humans and Geese. We eat them at Christmas time, they terrorise our picnics. It's a feud as old as time, with countless tears and bloodshed, and yet we are doomed to torture each other as long as we both walk this Earth. Championing the Goose's side of the war, while still acknowledging the living chaos that our feathered friends ra...

We all know there are cat people and dog people, it's a fact of life. But just for the sake of this episode, we'll be asking all the cat people out there to take off their cat hats and consider loving instead the humble African Wild Dog. The most cat-like dog species in the world, due to the fact they are obligate carnivores, are revered in Ancient Egypt and have no time for human bullshit...

In case any of you were wondering, this episode brings Alice no joy. To be forced to dunk on your favourite animal of all time for the sake of comedy is a bittersweet and hollow experience. Listen with caution, you may be able to hear Alice's tears of sorrow...amidst the laughter. Joining Alice to talk about the bird with the highest beauty to crazy ratio is content creator and Toucan dad - Br...

What do you see when you look at a Pigeon? A "dumb bird" wandering aimlessly through life? A feathered rat delving through our garbage? A government surveillance drone hell-bent on documenting your secrets? Whether you think these things or not, Pigeons are here to stay. And they COULD just be the most stable and reliable presence in your life right now, so why not learn more about them?...