So Very Wrong About Games

Rest assured that every topic we address here at SVWAG will be utterly comprehensive and final, unless and until we decide to address it again. Thus, when we discuss tile-laying games, we perforce will cover all of them, each and and every one, and failure to specifically mention any title means it does not exist and must be scrubbed from all records as a revisionist lie. 01:41 AYURIS: Kutná Hora:...

"A quipu usually consists of cotton or camelid fiber cords, and contains categorized information based on dimensions like color, order and number. The Inca, in particular, used knots tied in a decimal positional system to store numbers and other values in quipu cords. Depending on its use and the amount of information it stored, a given quipu may have anywhere from a few to several thousand cords....

We are staunchly body positive here at SVWAG, but we do prefer our bears fat. "Let me have about me bears that are fat," said Shakespeare's Julius Caesar, or he would have, had he known about the glory that is Fat Bear Week. I guess Caesar wouldn't have been totally down with the democratic aspect of the whole voting thing, but whatever! Exercise your franchise and vote for the moist chonkers bear...

We tempt fate and refer to a number of third rails in the hobby community. For one, we acknowledge a loss in Regicide Legacy, which reliably summons the chattering mobs. Further, we mention both Star Trek and Star Wars, so undoubtedly we get a detail "wrong" that will "justify" a detailed response. Look, we're experts here. We completed the Kobayashi Maru in under 12 parsecs. We're regular callers...

"Well, that was your mother And that was your father Before you was born dude When life was great You are the burden of my generation I sure do love you But let’s get that straight" -Paul Simon, "That Was Your Mother" 01:34 AYURIS: Nucleum (Simone Luciani & Dávid Turczi, Board&Dice, 2023) Games Played Last Week: 04:04 -SILOS (Reiner Knizia, Bitewing Games, 2025) 09:34 -Ayar: Children of the Sun (M...

On this day of Labour, we offer our solidarity to you. We also offer our labour, because we don't take many days off. No union for us in the opinion mines! I'd complain to my manager, but since that's me, I guess I'd be inclined to ignore it. Classic conflict on interest. The gibbons only complicate the org chart in unhelpful ways. Games Played Last Week: 01:01 -Hot Streak (Jon Perry, CMYK, 2025)...

I've always chafed at the conventional wisdom that young goats are good at trick-taking games. Or, at least, ones where you are not incentivized to go null. Do they hold their cards in their cloven hooves? Do their dead eyes come to life when contemplating the vagaries of trump suits? It must be true, though, because I have it on good authority from a cartoon rabbit that tricks are for kids. 01:23...

Losing a component is rough. Knowing that one of your games is incomplete is like having a permanent absence in your soul. It's one thing to eschew that one added expansion--that's a triumph of restraint. But that missing block in Viking See-Saw will taunt you forever, a blight on your consciousness that can never be healed. Maybe I'm exaggerating. Games Played Last Week: 00:52 -Uprising: Curse of...

Inigo: I am waiting for you, Vizzini. You told me to go back to the beginning. So I have. This is where I am, and this is where I’ll stay. I will not be moved. Brute: But the Prince gave orders — Inigo: — So did Vizzini — when a job went wrong, you went back to the beginning. And this is where we got the job. So it’s the beginning, and I’m staying till Vizzini comes. -The Princess Bride (who knew...

"We don’t ask that you stop loving your fantasy world. We ask you stop paying money for the privilege to dream of it. If you want to read the [Harry Potter] books or watch the movies, consider buying second-hand or renting them from a library. Small changes can make sure you never put your hard-earned money into JKR’s hands." -Blacklist CGE zine Games Played Last Week: 01:01 -Through the Desert (R...

A chief misgiving Mark has about the con is that he is a terrible playtester. He was able to play two unpublished games, and while the designers were gracious he is seldom able to offer anything of much substance. "This game," he might say, "has cards. And other things." Past that, for some reason, when confronted with a prototype his faculties often fail him. 01:48 AYURIS: Arborea (Dani Garcia, A...

The purest juxtaposition that reveals the absurdity of "take that" effects can be found in many of your heavier games and some consims with cards. You gather the resources, marshal your forces, laboriously haul those troops hither and yon, and then sometimes have to manage some activation tokens or whatnot to finally get it on. And then your opponent plays the "nuh uh" card. Fun! 01:19 AYURIS: Day...

"Dear friend, if you wanna feel better Don't let the devil make you toss this letter If you've been crossed up by hoodoo voodoo A wizard or the lizard You got family trouble, man trouble, woman trouble No light through the tunnel If you're lookin' for a true friend, or a true lover Or if you've been livin' undercover Well, I'm comin' to your town to break it all down And help you with all of this...

It is remarkable to reflect on how much hobbies can demand of us, and certainly board gaming is no different. Setting aside the administrative, economic, and social burdens; we then have to spend so much time teaching, setting up, and tearing down. Alas! 23-step processes for general set up prior to the 12-step individual player board set up. It was not always thus, but here we are. 01:42 AYURIS:...

Apparently the American custom of the "push present" can trace its roots to the Anglo-Indian tradition of the "baby bauble", although in the latter case jewellery is the more standard gift (instead of, say, boardgames). Can we acknowledge that baby bauble is a much less crude term? Let's try to be classy here, people. There is already enough about childbirth that is fraught. Games Played Last Week...

Walker's approach to parenting eschews what he sees as the coddling endemic in other families. He believes in competition above all else, where newbs must be pwned and even babies must git gud. "L2P" is his family motto. Some appalled anthropologists tried making a documentary about the Walker household, but they were forced to tone it down and release it as Squid Game. 01:21 AYURIS: Through the D...

"Because of the long-standing mutual enmity between Meany and Brown, Meany was named among the suspects in The Case Of Encyclopedia Brown’s Mangled Corpse. Meany denied the allegations. 'It’s true that Detective Brown and I didn’t see eye to eye, but I would never do something so downright dirty rotten as murder him,' Meany said. 'Besides, it’s a matter of public record that, at the time the crime...

We generally frown on ad hominem here at SVWAG, ensconced as we are in our glass houses. In the case of Jean-Jacques Rousseau (known affectionately as "Ja-Jay" by no one), though, who wrote extensively about proper methods of childhood education, we shall report that he confessed to rather callously sandbagging his lover into abandoning their children (Rousseau claimed there were five of them, tho...

I've read several different accounts of the battle of Sekigahara, and I swear there's no mention of Kevin Bacon or anyone bleaching their hair. How am I to know if Pony Boy stayed golden?  Games Played Last Week: 01:42 -MicroMacro: Kids--Crazy City Park (Johannes Sich, Edition Spielwiese, 2025) 04:20 -Good Puppers (Chris Cieslik, Asmadi Games, 2021) 07:38 -23 Knives (Tyler J. Brown, Play to Z, 202...

Walker and Mark almost come to blows over Flip 7 this week. Their disagreements over the merits of the product (Game? Experience? Way of Life? Sub "Roll a 6, Win a Cookie" distraction?) have long simmered, but the fundamental schism can no longer be ignored or papered over. They finally have it out.  02:27 AYURIS: Knarr (Thomas Dupont, Bombyx, 2023) Games Played Last Week: 03:36 -Autobahn (Fabio L...

"Observers brought attention to [Gritty's] appearance, which could be construed as frightening, while The Guardian described him as an "acid trip of a mascot." Response to Gritty's introduction was immediate and sharply mixed, with many fans on social media expressing bewilderment and some fright at his appearance. Public perception of Gritty became increasingly positive as Gritty's antics, which...

"gibber--intransitive verb :to speak rapidly, inarticulately, and often foolishly" -Merriam-Webster "gibberer--noun :the hosts of SVWAG" Games Played Last Week: 01:17 -Sausage Sizzle (Inka and Marcus Brand, 25th Century Games, 2012) 05:22 -Landmarks (Rodrigo Rego & Danilo Valente, Floodgate Games, 2024) 09:11 -Skara Brae (Shem Phillips, Garphill Games, 2025) 14:20 -Moving Company (Guo Jiahui & Wu...

Chaka Khan, let me rock you Let me rock you, Chaka Khan Let me rock you, that's all I wanna do Chaka Khan, let me rock you Let me rock you, Chaka Khan Let me rock you, 'cause I feel for you -Chaka Khan, "I Feel for You" 01:26 AYURIS: Barcelona (Dani Garcia, Board&Dice, 2023) Games Played Last Week: 03:10 -Snap Ships Tactics: Swarm Box (Josh Derksen, Snap Ships, 2025)  10:13 -Battle of Mekaverse (R...

While we pride ourselves in playing more games in a week than many play in a month, when we take a week away from the SVWAG studio we often face a truly herculean backlog of games to discuss. This two-week period is no exception. Rest assured, we would never leave our dear listeners in the lurch, so we will keep you updated so you need not miss a thing. 01:00 AYURIS: Race to the Raft (Frank West,...

Tiebreakers are arguably a kind of endgame scoring. I respect the fact that they are invariably necessary (I mean, if for no other reason than if they're omitted some smartass like me will complain). That said, clearly if the scoreboard goes to 200+ I don't imagine we'll be hauling out the second tiebreaker condition all that much. Frequently the endgame conversion of resources to points already s...